(Hate like autumn water)

The author has a history of stuttering for 40 years. 65438-0988, went to Shanghai alone to receive psychological guidance from Mr. Zhang Jinghui, the founder and pioneer of stuttering correction in China. Deep inside, the rusty iron gate opened, and the warm sunshine shone into the cold heart. Spring returns to the earth, full of vitality, and a new journey has begun.

The First Concept Change (Zhang Jinghui Cognitive Therapy)

An accidental incident made me realize a truth: because there is an air-conditioning hole in the corner of the new house at home, small sparrows often get into the house from the hole. The birds that came in flew around the house, desperately flying towards the bright window. I hit the transparent glass and stopped for a while. The bird turned and flew to other windows, and the result was still the same. In order to escape, the bird flew around the room, constantly hitting the window and the wall, and finally it was terrible.

In fact, birds can't find holes to come in, which is an instinct to survive. When it saw the bright and transparent window, it thought it was a way out, but it was actually a trap.

The authorities are confused, and the bystanders are clear. Outside the house, the bird can easily find the hole in the wall there, but after going in, it gets lost. This situation reminds me of eating friends, and so do patients! I think I'm smart, I hit everywhere, and finally I broke my head, and I have to hit the south wall and never look back!

In the long-term practice of fighting stuttering, patients have accumulated rich "experiences and lessons". The understanding of stuttering is also "very profound", but our patients' understanding of stuttering is almost wrong.

Generally speaking, stutterers are physically and mentally healthy, excellent in study and work, and their thinking and judgment abilities are not worse than those of normal people. They are just caught in the fog on the "point" of stuttering, stubbornly holding prejudice, which leads to turning a blind eye. "Confusion between right and wrong" means that if you are addicted to stuttering, your attitude towards stuttering can't be correct. The patient's morbid psychology and wrong attitude towards stuttering is largely due to the wrong understanding of stuttering. Therefore, a comprehensive and correct understanding of stuttering, and then change the wrong psychology about it, can eradicate stuttering. If only by using some skills and means to fight stuttering, this correction method is necessary, but at best it is only an auxiliary therapy that treats the symptoms rather than the root cause, just like taking some painkillers, it is impossible to cure stuttering.

We should fully and correctly understand stuttering and the law of its formation and development. Only by finding out the law of stuttering and applying it to the practice of correction can we finally tame stuttering and really cure it effectively.

Patients often complain that others don't understand and sympathize with themselves, and even blame stuttering for all mistakes in work and life. They often feel distressed about this, but in fact, the patients themselves don't understand themselves. Fascinated by stuttering, I have lost the ability to judge myself and my stuttering, so all emotional activities expressed by stuttering are exaggerated and wrong. People who stutter must never ignore their emotional activities. Correct cognition can avoid detours and embark on a benign and healthy track as soon as possible, while wrong judgment will induce patients to enter a vicious circle and get lost in the maze of stuttering. The results of cognition help patients to establish certain beliefs, which directly affect the performance of patients' personality and behavior.

People who stutter clearly know that the environment plays an important role in stuttering. But what really matters is not so much the environment itself as people's attitude towards the environment. Traces of past experience and current stimuli have a great influence on the role of individuals. Stuttering is always associated with past sad and intense experiences, which can only be explained by emotions and attitudes. Therefore, the incorrect attitude towards stuttering is the root of psychological disorder and symptom fixation, so it is necessary to educate yourself to change the wrong attitude towards stuttering. This change is only possible through psychotherapy.

Encouragement, comfort, hypnosis, slogan suggestion, etc. Does not belong to the category of suggestion therapy, even if it will produce immediate results, it is only temporary. Because hinting can't change patients' wrong understanding and attitude towards stuttering. Moreover, most patients tend to be rational, critical and curious, and are easy to accept hints that encourage anxiety, while positive hints are not easy to affect them.

Pronunciation method, systematic desensitization method (including breakthrough method), beat method, breathing method, gesture method, stamping method, line of sight transfer method and idea transfer method all belong to distraction therapy. Although these methods are effective, they are only temporary. Because diverting the brain's attention is based on the principle that the human brain cannot use both: shifting the patient's attention to stuttering can effectively express what he wants to say. But repeatedly stimulating the brain for a long time, the intensity of stimulation needs to be increased, otherwise the brain will ignore it. It should be noted that any method and means to divert attention will be ineffective if it is used for a long time.

There are active and passive migration, or conscious and unconscious migration. The migration method mentioned above belongs to active migration and is a conscious activity. Do not take the initiative to speak, wait for the other party to ask questions, do not take the initiative to call, etc. It belongs to passive migration and unconscious activities. Can't be satisfied.

These behavioral therapies are essential in the early treatment of stuttering, especially for patients with many stuttering phenomena. Behavioral therapy can reduce the repetitive stimulation of stuttering to the brain, relieve psychological pressure, reduce the resistance of patients to cognitive therapy, and pave the way for patients to receive cognitive therapy. We must understand that behavioral therapy cannot fundamentally solve the psychological essence of stuttering, on the contrary, it will hinder the rehabilitation of stuttering. Therefore, in a sense, these methods to combat stuttering symptoms belong to tossing, and even aggravate the psychological entanglement complex.

Only on the basis of a correct understanding of stuttering can we consciously change the wrong attitude towards stuttering and fundamentally solve the problem of stuttering.

Actively criticizing one's wrong attitude is of great significance for correcting stuttering and is also a sign of progress. Local associations and correction classes can organize patients to hold a "complaint meeting" so that they can fully and unreservedly tell the secrets that have been in their hearts for many years and are afraid to tell anyone or even their close relatives. By talking, you can relieve your inner pain, ease your psychological entanglement and make yourself feel comfortable. And in the process of complaining, patients often spontaneously and actively criticize their own and others' wrong attitudes.

Only by self-criticism can we change the wrong attitude towards stuttering, can we change the content of our inner world.

I don't know the true face of Lushan Mountain, just because I am on this mountain. Patients must observe themselves objectively, dissect and analyze themselves, uncover the etiology and pathogenesis of stuttering, and analyze in detail the factors that promote stuttering and immobilized stuttering and the conditions that hinder complete recovery. Only by further understanding and familiarity with one's inner world, one's attitude towards stuttering, and the experience of mental trauma can we find out the complicated causes of stuttering and improve one's attitude and mood towards stuttering. Free from the ideological burden closely surrounding stuttering and free from fixed psychological obstacles. It's not specious, but really understand your stuttering, and the pimple in your heart will gradually untie like the melting snow after returning to the earth in spring.

You can't see the mountain when you enter the mountain, but you can see the scenery when you leave the mountain. Only by completely changing the wrong concept of stuttering and getting rid of wrong ideas can we embark on the correct track of eradicating stuttering. When you enter this orbit, you don't need motivation, you rely entirely on the patient's consciousness. This is a closed rehabilitation track for stuttering. This is a thoroughly remould oneself in thought, a pain in soul, a thorough awareness in consciousness and a brand-new height in understanding. We call it the top of Mount Tai. Only by climbing the top of Mount Tai can stuttering be regarded as the first recovery. The "goal" of radical cure is within reach.

The second psychological rehabilitation (Zhang Jinghui's inaction therapy)

This step is for those who have reached the top of Mount Tai, and those who have not yet arrived can understand it. See Chapter 6 of Zhang Jinghui's Introduction to Stuttering Treatment for details.

Zhang Jinghui said, "No one who has recovered from stuttering will say how he was cured. He can't remember how and when he recovered. If a person who claims to be cured says that he cured it in some way, he is lying to you. His illness was not cured at all. The rehabilitation of stuttering is self-healing. "

After the patient's stubborn wrong attitude towards stuttering is shattered, he will give up his extravagant hopes and unrealistic dreams about stuttering. This is undoubtedly a milestone for the radical cure of stuttering.

The rusty iron gate was finally opened, and the closed atrium was seen again, and the warm sunshine shone into the cool atrium. Patients will feel at ease.

At this point, it can't be said that stuttering is really cured.

First, consolidating the foundation and cultivating the yuan is fundamental.

The patient just escaped from the magic cave of stuttering, as if he had recovered from a serious illness and was still very weak. Do everything, everything starts from scratch. As a result of the long-term struggle with stuttering, the body and mind have been devastated, fragmented and seriously distorted. All this needs to be restored and cured. But rehabilitation needs nursed back to health and takes time. The process is bit by bit. As the saying goes, illness goes away like spinning silk. Only after a long time, when you look back at the road you have traveled, will you find qualitative changes.

The so-called short-term radical cure within one year is unrealistic. Stuttering didn't happen overnight. Rome was not built in a day. Long-term unremitting struggle with stuttering leads to the gradual aggravation of stuttering and increasing fear. We see stuttering and mention stuttering, just like seeing a tiger.

Once beaten, twice shy. What's more, we all have medical records for more than ten years or even decades. When it comes to stuttering, patients will be jumpy when they see the words "mouth" and "eat". This fear is hysterical and irresistible.

Patients all know that if there is no fear of stuttering, they will not stutter. Yes, fear always accompanies the process of recovery. Fear is the "brand" of stutterers. For example, an unforgettable experience in After Lovelorn, you can't just forget it, but time is the best forgetful agent. One year, three years, five years, or even ten years, our broken hearts will gradually heal and the "brand" will gradually fade. There is no forgetfulness in the world, so it is unrealistic to forget stuttering in the short term.

Second, even-odd stuttering is a curse.

Why stuttering cannot be cured for a long time is because stuttering is not a single lesion, but a series of intertwined malignant pathological chains. Evaluating stuttering is its lubricant and power source. Failure to evaluate stuttering means that pathological stuttering has lost its lubricant and "power source". The pathological chain of vicious circle will gradually lose its activity.

What is evaluation? Overcomment on what I have said, whether it is good or bad: speak well, be cheerful, get carried away, and talk more and more to show off my eloquence. I stammered and made a fool of myself, so I was very sad. I suddenly fell into the ice room and blamed myself. Reflect on the causes of stuttering, simulate the scene, and practice stuttering sentences and words repeatedly. I don't eat or sleep. Immersed in infinite disappointment and pain. Even worry, imagine, imagine what will happen after stuttering, what impact it will have on your future, and worry that it will affect your life. Whether stuttering or not, proper evaluation is human nature, but over-evaluation is tossing and pestering.

Because the recovery process is endless, patients often lose patience and wait for a radical cure. There will be indecision, vacillation and even retrogression in the middle. This is because the symptoms of stuttering always develop and change periodically like people's emotions. When the symptoms are serious or the mood is at a low ebb, stuttering symptoms such as stubborn stuttering, intermediate stuttering and recurrent stuttering will greatly stimulate the injured mind of patients and breed negative emotions. In addition, patients have the idea of urgent recovery, which leads to the phenomenon of looking back, wandering and retrogression frequently during the recovery process. Just like a rice cooker, opening the lid from time to time will affect the cooking speed.

So during the recovery process:

1. What if you have a premonition of stuttering?

2. What should I do if I stutter and lose face?

3. What should I do if I have difficulty pronouncing?

4. What should I do if I have fear?

This series of questions is enough to make patients doubt repeatedly, and even shake and lose confidence in Zhang Jinghui's theory.

1, what should I do if my stuttering premonition comes?

With a premonition of stuttering, patients usually brew feelings, launch fierce psychological struggles, and suggest not to be afraid and speak out bravely.

Remember: the strength of stuttering premonition is directly proportional to the desire to express, and inversely proportional to the importance of the expressed content.

Generally speaking, if what you want to say is so important that you have to say it, the patient will be desperate to rush over, and the premonition of stuttering will be suppressed by the psychology of "what you want to say is very important" (rather than the brave spirit of "rushing over"), then the patient can fully express what you want to say; If all you have to say is irrelevant nonsense, then the premonition of stuttering will not disappear so easily. At this time, if the patient encourages himself to speak out, there is only one dead end: the more he wants to express himself, the stronger his premonition of stuttering; The more I want to rush over, the more I worry about the consequences of not being able to do it. The more worried, the more unwilling, I have to say! To this end, he desperately brewed feelings, tossing and turning, and finally the fear of stuttering would be extremely inflated in an instant! This expansion is geometrically proportional to the patient's desire to rush over. Let the patient be extremely scared! If the patient wants to break through at this time, it is tantamount to throwing eggs at the stone, which is bound to break his head and make him feel sad! In fact, he can't cross this "iron wall" built in an instant.

The correct attitude is to say whatever you want, and if you can't say it, don't say it! I have no objection to patients using some unique pronunciation skills to express themselves at this time. I really can't open my mouth, so walking is the best policy (silence). Never hesitate, let alone hint and encourage yourself, in an attempt to overcome this fear! After that, whether I was lucky enough to say it or not, I forgot all about it. Even if there is a feeling of depression and unfinished business (if you don't say what you want to say, you will be a little depressed and upset), let this feeling be fully vented. Don't stop it head-on, let alone add fuel to the fire: blame yourself, sum up the lessons of failure, and even repeatedly simulate the scenes that happened during the drill. I can only convince myself and comfort myself from the side. Even if you can't help but simulate what happened, you can't help it. You have to follow it and convince yourself. You can only ask yourself silently: Is it necessary for me to blame myself and rehearse the scene like this? In a word, after all the emotions are generated, don't control them, let alone indulge them. You can only persuade them and guide them from the side to calm them down as soon as possible.

Please remember: emotions can't be suppressed, and the result of repression will inevitably lead to greater emotional outbursts. But the behavior it causes can be controlled.

The degree of control over movements is the cultivation of people. I can't restrain my anger when my husband and wife quarrel, but I can control myself not to hit people or smash things.

2. What should I do if I stutter and lose face?

Not evaluating stuttering is the key. After that, I don't evaluate what happened. Even if I am sad and depressed, I don't restrain myself, I don't block the vent of this emotion, I don't repeatedly simulate the scenes that happened in the drill, I don't blame myself, and I even want to punch myself in the mouth. To say the least, if all these emotional things happen involuntarily: I repeatedly simulate what happened, I blame myself, and even want to punch myself in the mouth, and so on. We shouldn't stop them from happening. Let these feelings be fully vented. At most, I can only convince myself from the side, comfort myself, and let the uneven heart restore calm as soon as possible.

Please remember that it is more valuable to allow stuttering, premonition and fear after speaking than to allow before speaking.

Generally speaking, in the scene where the premonition of stuttering is very strong and the fear of stuttering is very strong, few people dare to say it. Although Zhang Jinghui, a stuttering master, has repeatedly asked his students: If they are afraid of returning, speak out and bite the bullet and rush over! But few students dare to cross this step! Although everyone knows that as long as you dare to cross this step, you will speak fluently. This leap is the highest state of life after death. In the face of the abyss, even if there is a cry, there is hope for life if you jump. But who dares to jump until do or die (followed by suitors)? We can have the courage to treat stuttering, and the cure of stuttering is one step away.

An inappropriate metaphor: Do you dare to open your eyes and watch others throw sand into your eyes? If you were thrown into the sand without any help, would you allow this to exist? My answer is that I will never allow others to put sand in my eyes in front of me unless I have to. To say the least, what can I do in this unfortunate and painful event? I can only allow this fact. What's the help if I complain? I'm sorry, and I regret it. Can you change this fact?

Before I speak, it will be embarrassing to see myself stuttering. Seeing stuttering will damage my image. This series of worries and fears made me afraid to stammer. I will instinctively hide and suppress this stuttering, and even I will run away in despair. Isn't this human nature?

After that, I will feel sad, depressed and even blame myself, or I may simulate the scene myself. When I understand that these feelings and inner activities belong to human nature, do I still need to stop them from happening? I can only obey them and let them vent freely. At most, I can only convince myself from the side and comfort myself: since there has been such an embarrassing incident as avoiding the important or stuttering seriously, it is futile to feel sad again, and it is too late to regret it again! Comfort yourself in this way and let your mood return to calm as soon as possible. If you do the opposite, it will stir up the churning of the sea of hearts and set off more waves! Imagine, isn't that how our stuttering disease is increasing day by day?

Therefore, we say that it is more important to allow stuttering after speaking than before speaking.

3. What should I do if I have difficulty pronouncing?

The result of the struggle between difficult pronunciation and difficult image. So the harder it is to pronounce, the more you spell it. How to eliminate pronunciation difficulties? The only way is not to resist. Any confrontation is to strengthen the difficulty of pronunciation. The correct attitude is to say whatever you want, and if you can't say it, don't say it! I have no objection to patients using some unique pronunciation skills to express themselves at this time, or bypassing the more difficult pronunciation or simply omitting it. I really can't open my mouth. "Walking is the best policy"-silence. After that, I don't evaluate what happened. Even if I am sad and depressed, I can't restrain myself. Let my mood be fully vented. I can only convince myself from the side, comfort myself, and let the uneven heart restore calm as soon as possible.

4. What if fear comes?

As the saying goes, people are as tall as Dont Ask For Help, and water is as flat as no flow. Distance leads to mystery, and mystery leads to awe. No matter who or what, only by recognizing its essence and finding out its temperament can we not be afraid of it, or even control it.

Please remember: what really scares people is not from the objective world, but from their own hearts. People are always filled with infinite mystery and awe of their inner world.

It is not a day or two since the fear of stuttering took root in patients' hearts. It gradually developed in the practice of patients struggling with stuttering for a long time.

If there is fear before speaking, the patient will instinctively reject it, suggesting not to be afraid. For example, if you hint at yourself: I am afraid of what he (she) will do, what he (she) can do to me, and so on, encourage yourself to break through bravely, so that the fear will be stronger.

Note: The more you suppress and stop fear, the more you help it. Fear will soar geometrically in an instant, making you extremely scared and chilling! In front of it, you must give in honestly. The suppression of fear will lead to the consolidation and deepening of fear.

What is the essence of fear?

We usually have two kinds of fears when we speak: one is stage fright (or social fear), and the other is our fear of stuttering. The former is not the object of our study, but the normal neuroticism that everyone has. The latter's fear of stuttering includes two situations:

(1) I am worried about losing face after stuttering and affecting my image and future. The purpose of its fear is to influence its future. This kind of fear belongs to the category of social fear. It is the initial reaction of stutterers before speaking on the spot, and it is the lowest psychological phenomenon of fear. Just like normal people get nervous and scared before speaking on the spot. Fear of making a fool of yourself in public, fear of rudeness and so on. Therefore, it is a natural psychological reaction for patients to worry about losing face after stuttering.

So how to eliminate or alleviate this fear? The treatment of social phobia can be used for reference. Breakthrough therapy in systematic desensitization therapy is a relatively direct and effective means.

(2) The embarrassing scenes and past events in the past are the biggest worries and worries in patients' hearts. Every time I think about it, the patient will have a lingering fear and shudder. This subjective factor is the real reason why patients are nervous and afraid before speaking. So all patients feel the same way: "If I forget all my past stuttering experiences, my stuttering disease will be fine", which is the truth.

Why is there such a fear? First of all, stuttering does lead to embarrassing situations, but what determines people is not what happens, but people's attitude towards it. If we had laughed at the occasional stuttering scene, treated it correctly, and smiled at me indifferently with you, maybe we wouldn't have developed into today's fear. The source of the disease is a misunderstanding of stuttering. In other words, a wrong understanding leads to a wrong evaluation, a wrong attitude, and thus breeds fear. Therefore, in order to overcome this fear, we must first accept the correct cognitive therapy, correctly understand stuttering, correctly evaluate the consequences of stuttering, dig deep into wrong ideas, fundamentally destroy the wrong idea of "one person eats the most" and effectively change the wrong attitude. As long as the source factors of fear are eliminated ideologically and the personal experience in practice is added, the fear of stuttering can be gradually alleviated.

It must be pointed out that:

Reducing non-pathological stuttering in a large area can alleviate the fear of patients with moderate or above stuttering to some extent;

Taking circuitous measures to avoid pathological stuttering as much as possible can alleviate the fear of mild and recessive patients to some extent.

The object of fear described in (1), that is, "fear of losing face after stuttering and affecting one's image and future" is an objective factor.

(2) The object of fear described in "embarrassing scenes and embarrassing past events" is subjective factors.

Objective factors are easy to deal with because they are visible and tangible. Direct and effective measures can be taken to eliminate it in a short time. Subjective factors are invisible, even more intangible, and cannot be directly eliminated.

Can you overcome your fears before you speak? The answer is no. Any fear of nervousness, once it attacks your mind, you can't overcome it. There is no universal way to overcome tension in the world. Only by facing the tension correctly. Go to work with nervousness. There is no hate without reason, no love without reason, and no tension and fear without reason.

Before speaking impromptu, can you care about the embarrassment and future consequences caused by stuttering? I believe that few people who stutter can do it.

Before making an impromptu speech, can you suppress the embarrassing scene you don't want to live? It is human nature to be moved by the scene! I believe no one can do it.

We should allow these fears to exist. Never block it from the front, let this fear have an exit. The best thing you can do is to convince yourself and ask yourself, "Why should I be afraid?" Never hint that you "don't be afraid", or even encourage yourself to overcome and break through fear.

There is a fear before speaking, so I didn't fight it directly and let it vent freely. I won't comment afterwards. There is a kind of fear that leads to abnormal expression, even stuttering on the spot, embarrassing yourself. It is inevitable that you will be sad, depressed and depressed. I also let them vent freely. I can only convince myself from the side. Do not blame yourself, do not repeatedly simulate the scene at that time, do not summarize the lessons of failure, and so on. Even if the above "don't" is difficult to do, you can only let them vent. In short, emotional venting must not be blocked! Otherwise, it will set off a bigger emotional wave.

Since we dare not confront fear head-on, we can always stay away from it and bypass it, right? Fear is like a cliff standing in front of us. We are afraid of it and can't break through. What do we do? Spend more time on its side or back. When you finally stand on the top of the mountain as a winner, will you still feel that the cliff you stepped on is still unattainable? Will you still shrink back? Look at your original position under the cliff, what kind of mood will you feel? At the beginning, the feeling of passing away, you will be dismissive. Because you are completely integrated into the universe, you are full of passion and pride.

Third, things are often unsatisfactory.

Stuttering is life. Without a correct outlook on life and values, stuttering is difficult to recover. Greed, indulgence, impetuousness and arrogance are our natural enemies. Being able to bear, being able to let go, being calm, broad-minded, caring, maintaining good interpersonal relationships and knowing the relationship between gains and losses are all excellent characters. Patients have high expectations for the future. I thought stuttering was the most troublesome thing, but I didn't know that the troubles of life always existed. Once the trouble of stuttering is eliminated, your work and life troubles will follow. In fact, they are already in front of you, but they were blocked by your stuttering before, so you couldn't see them. A leaf is blind, that is why. Life needs big and small troubles. If you have no worries, you will be very sad. You have Ma Pingchuan's eyes. Looking at the central plains, I am the only one. But a mountain stands in front of you. It is the wall of death, and you will directly face the extreme fear of death. On no account can you climb over this wall. This wall is invisible and invisible, because we are too busy with work and life and have too many troubles, so we can't take care of it. Once we have everything and have no worries, it will stand out in front of people. You will worry about it and even do a lot of ridiculous things. In ancient times, Qin Shihuang lived a luxurious and decadent life, but Qin Shihuang was afraid of the night and worried that once he fell asleep, he would never wake up. In the face of death, Qin Shihuang was very afraid. So he sent 3,000 boys and girls to the East China Sea to look for an elixir of life. Refining elixir of life means immortality.

Fourth, one advance and one retreat is life.

Stuttering often occurs repeatedly in the process of rehabilitation. There are many forks in the road to rehabilitation, which makes patients hesitate and hesitate.

The fear of stuttering occupied our hearts for a certain period of time, making patients almost lose confidence. "I don't struggle how can there be fear? I don't comment. How can you still stutter? " Yes, the author once had such a wandering. "For several years, stuttering premonition and fear how still the same? Is Mr. Zhang Jinghui fooling us? Is stuttering really a terminal illness? " With this question, at 1989, I wrote a letter to Zhang Jinghui, a teacher in Shanghai, telling her my recovery process and my ideological doubts. The teacher's answer is concise; One advance and one retreat is life. Wake up the dreamer in one word. From then on, I plunged into my work and life. This tie is 20 years old!