2. There is a saying: "Drums and gongs". My dad has been listening to "big ass, cock up". He still wants to know, why are you sticking your ass up?
3. The first time I heard Zhao Yonghua's The Most Romantic Thing, the sentence "The most romantic thing I can think of is to grow old with you" I heard: "The most romantic thing I can think of is to sell computers with you!" At that time, I thought Zhongguancun was advertising.
4. Cheng Lin's The Journey to the West "The geese listen to my song, and the river kisses my face" was heard as "the uncle listens to my song, and the teenager kisses my face". I thought to myself, what kind of woman is this!
5. The theme song "Make me sad or drunk ..." always sounds like "Make me sad or drunk ..." in Richie Jen's version of "The Condor Heroes". Hey, why do you always have a problem with the leading actor! ! !
6. Make a weight-loss advertisement on TV, put your hand on your waist, come out and shake it and say, "If you want to lose weight, why not use Sofitel?" Hear "if you want to lose weight, why don't you support it with your hands?" I thought, how can I lose weight just by holding it in my hand?
7. When Donald was a child, "Ah-oh, the performance began" and what he heard was: "Ah-oh, wild boar shit!
8. My colleague listened to Jeff Chang Shin-Che's Love Like Tide, and asked me doubtfully, "Why did he sing' Promise me you won't line up in the middle of the night'?"
9. The first time I listened to Tong Ange's Girl in Jelja, I was surprised and heard: "Wild donkey, mysterious wild donkey ~ ~ ~".
10 《 Listening to Mom's Past Stories 》: We sat next to a high grain pile ~ ~ ~
Listen: we are sitting next to a pile of tall bones ~ ~ The scene of piles of bones comes to mind, sweating like a pig!
1 1. Listen to Unforgettable Tonight: Bye, bye, see you in the morgue. .................................................................................................................................
12, I have listened to Elva Hsiao's "Love Title Song" for a long time. "I feel everything when I sing, so you are my title song." At that time, I always mistook this "opening song" for "Brother Zhu" or "Brother Pig". I wonder what this lyric means.
13, Eason Chan >; There is a saying like this: "There are thousands of doors, one person goes first", and every time I hear it, "From street to door, one person goes first".
14, there is a phrase "It rained all night" in Jay Chou's "Li Qixiang". I have been listening to it as "You are blind".
15, Stephanie's "Magic Capital" song has a sentence: "We are both wearing cloth gauze ..." What I hear is: "We are both wearing underpants ..."
16, a song in Jiang Meiqi said "It's not easy to laugh", and suddenly it became "It's not easy to pee". I don't know what happened to this MM!
17, Jay Chou's Love Before BC and Staring at My Picture, I always listen: You are my bowl of noodles!
18, Sammi Kao's Waiting for a Thousand Years, Water of West Lake, My Tears were listened to as Water of Daughter-in-law, My Tears, and Water of Washing Clothes, My Tears, alas!
19, Tao Jingying's "Sister Stand Up" and "Then Wait for Fall" is really easy to hear as "Then Wait for J》~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Sweating to death! !
20. The first sentence of Song of Macao, which was popular when Macao returned to China, said, "You know Macao is not my real surname." I always thought it was: "It's good not to eat me!"
2 1. I recently listened to "Sweet and Sour is Me" by Baby Zhang, a super girl, and heard that "... it's really me, and my desire is fresh every day" ... I was shocked. What a bold little girl consciousness! ! ! After listening to it several times, it turned out that "every day is new to me"
22. Listen to a sentence in Fish Leong: "I went to sleep as soon as I knew it, and I slept very quietly". I heard that it was "eat and sleep" and I exclaimed at that time: How can there be such vivid lyrics!
23, Sun Nan's "Be there or be square", I don't know what happened to my ears during that time. Every time I hear "Oh, be there or be square" in the climax of the video store, I always think it's-"Oh, Cambodia" ....
24. There is also a fire wind song played outside the university dormitory every day: "Big red sail, good wind", and I always hear it as "Big red sail, good sheep herding"
25. Listen to Zhang Mingmin's Country Road: Walking on a country road, the old cow who came back at dusk is my companion. I used to think that walking on a country road, the tortoise and the old cow were my companions.
26. Mai's "Come to Taipei to See the Winter Rain", how to listen to it is: "Everyone crowded to Taipei to see you", wondering, is it so good? Does everyone have to squeeze in to see you?
27. Adu: I should be under the car, not in the car; I should be in the car, not in the car. ~ ~ What's going on? '
28. There is a sentence in A Du's "He must love you very much", "I want to give you a surprise with champagne in my hand". I can hear it as "I have an eraser in my hand". I can't figure out what the rubber has to do with breaking up.
29. My colleague Kang Jie has a standard Shaanxi accent. Every time she goes to the love song classroom, she likes to sing "Heart Rain" by Mao Ning and Yang Yuying. Every time, she sings the lyrics "My thoughts are no longer the sea that burst its banks" as "My thoughts are no longer the sweat on my feet", which makes me want to vomit every time.
In the 1930s and 1980s, the advertisement of the domestic "Yanwu" tape recorder (Yancheng Drop) read: "Yanwu, Yanwu, a song brings a feeling", and what I heard was "Dislike, Dislike, let's get together and kiss".
3 1, "Descendants of the Dragon", the sentence "Keep your eyes open forever" has never been understood at first, but it always sounds like "forever, two years apart". I have always wondered why it is always two years apart.
32. In Andy Lau's People in China, "How many dreams have been hidden in five thousand years" sounds like "How many dreams have been hidden in Jacklyn Wu". Strange, maybe they are related?
33. In Zhang Mingmin's Descendants of the Dragon, there is a saying "black eyes, black hair and yellow skin". I always thought it was "black eyes, black hair and yellow ass", damn it! Yellow skin, Mandarin is great!
34. In the past, You Hongming's "falling in love with someone is easy to lose your mind" was heard as "falling in love with someone is easy to lose your body". Strange, why is it so easy to lose your virginity?
35. Jolin Tsai's "Love 36 Plan": I can score points without being ruled out ~ ~ ~ I can only knock it over and not be thrown out. I don't know what it means for a long time.
36, Jolin Tsai-Women's University learned eighteen changes, how to listen to how is "your uncle died eight times"?
37. When I was a child, I listened to Xintianyou: "I bow to the ravine" and always thought it was "my head is in the ravine".
38. Jacky Cheung sang "The ending is not what I want"-"... The ending is not what I want ... I'm not the one waiting at the window ..." My friends and I listened to it many times and thought that "I'm not the one waiting in the toilet ..." I didn't understand.
39. There is also a mythical saying "flying butterfly". I've heard it for more than n times, but I still heard it as "flying color TV" At that time, I especially understood that even color TVs and hammers could fly. No wonder it is called a myth.
40、gt； Look, I can't see, riding a cockroach, the grass grows! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~^
4 1, listen < >: dragon, dragon, you shine, listen: dragon, dragon, you put your eyes in. I thought there was something wrong with this man at that time. It's okay. You need a dragon to enter your eyes.
42. Learn from Lei Feng and set a good example. . . . . Stand firm, Douxiang. . . Why do beans smell good when they stand firm? Because beans are patriotic, right? I've always understood it this way.
43. Listen to Lu Huabing: Every night when I think of my mother's words, my tears are shining. Lu Huabing-Listen: My tears are shining when Grandpa thinks of my mother's words. ~ ~
I always thought so. I don't quite understand other lyrics. I thought it was a ballad. My mother should tell my grandfather what to do. ...
44. Jolin Tsai is "inexplicable words, inexplicable words". Many of our friends have heard that "you are pregnant for no reason, you are pregnant for no reason." Still wondering why ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
45. When I watched Young Yang Jiajiang, I liked listening to Farewell Poems very much, so I went to Baidu to download them. Every time I hear the lyrics of "A horde of horses is sore", I feel depressed. How can such an atmospheric song have such abnormal lyrics? I looked up the lyrics and finally understood that it should be "a thousand troops and horses alone." I am sweating.
46. "Aurora" I heard: (Love is a lamp) Love is a cauldron ~ ~ ~
47. At that time, Jay Chou had just released Star Clear, and my classmate bought an album to listen to at home. Suddenly, her father rushed out of the room and said, "What song did you listen to? How come there are even lyrics like "no three no four"? " My classmate is very confused. What is no three no four? Later, I learned that her father heard the phrase "hand in hand, one step, two steps, three steps and four steps" as "hand in hand, one step, two steps, no three, no four steps". . .
48, a thousand years and so on = a thousand years of female ghosts, my female ghosts ~ ~ ~-
49. Love Song 1990: It is rare to find a stupid donkey (partner) to know again in life.
50. There is a song in "White-haired Girl": The north wind blows and the snow floats. How I listen to it is: the north wind takes the hammer and the heavy snow takes the ladle! I thought who had a fight with whom!
5 1, the code name of Jay Chou: "They guess, just guess. Not important. " Always hear: "He doesn't guess, it doesn't matter who is abnormal ~ ~ ~ ~"
52. When I was a child, I always listened to the radio singing: I am a cake, and I like to eat ordinary people.
53. There is a sentence in How Can It Be So Stupid: "My panda eye was stung by the sunshine ...". I always hear: "My chest hair is also stung by the sun ...". My heart is freezing ~ ~ ~
54. The first sentence of Wusuli's boat song is still: "I peed in the river. I pee in the river, ................ "You said that the man didn't have self-restraint, so he peed in the river and sang smugly. The world is getting worse, and people's hearts are not ancient.
55. There is a saying in A Farewell to Love, "Love me, love me". Steve Chou simply sang "Kill me, kill me". If you don't believe me, just listen!
56. Someone often plays a song in the office: "I always stand where you hurt me" ... I always hear "I always stand where you killed me", so I still feel creepy when I hear this song = _ =!
57. When I was in primary school, I listened to the popular "Race with the Bull" many years ago: passers-by in heaven and earth ran up and down, and I heard that "the pot shell of heaven and earth is very heavy, and it is fried and fried". I don't know how to cook smartly.
58. One of my classmates listened to "You are a deep brand in my heart" in the ending song of "Plum Blossom Branding" as "You are an eagle rising in my heart"
59. I remember a song by Jay Chou, who kept singing: Jay Chou, Jay Chou, Jay Chou, Jay Chou and Jay Chou. ...
As a result, I always hear: this bitch, this bitch, this bitch, this bitch, this bitch. ...
60. Wu Zongxian once sang Britney Spears Baby One More Time as Baby Playing with Blankets ~ ~ ~ ~
6 1, Jordan chan has a song "She is like a fairy, she is so beautiful". What I always hear is "She is like an antenna, she is so beautiful".
I have always wondered why she is so beautiful, just like an antenna.
62. I first listened to Jacky Cheung's Hello, Hello, Hello, Bald, Bald, Bald, Bald. . . . "At that time, I wondered which monk Lao Zhang had a hard time with, and I didn't have to make up a song to swear, did I?
63. Listen to May's sisters say, "You are my sister, you are my baby!" I don't understand why it belongs to my sister and my uncle! ?
64. Listening to Liu Huan's "Asian Hero"-the Asian wind blows-the two bald men in the village always thought they were "Asian bombers"
65. Listening to CoCo Lee's magic mirror, there is a saying: Mirror, tell me, what do men want? I heard it: hen hen told me, what do men want? Others listened: mom and mom told me, what do men want?
66. I often put it in Faye Wong. I am willing to do it for you, I am willing to do it for you, I am willing to feed you, I am willing to feed you ... I am willing to feed you anything. ...
67. Xu Wei's song A mature woman named Bu Jingyun is actually: a mature woman is light-footed.
There is a treasure Qingtian in space and a selfless braid *
68. Adu has a lyric that sings like "Untie your disgusting coat". I was depressed after listening to it, and later I learned that it was "unbuttoning your defensive coat."
69. There is a saying in "Three Lane of Plum Blossoms", and what I heard is "We walked through brothels".
70. When I first went to Liangguang, I got up the courage to accept it-I got up the courage to give it up.
7 1, Mai's How Many Good Sisters Do You Have, contains a sentence "Why does every sister marry a tear?" How should I listen? They are all "Why does every girl have to marry a human?"
72 ... Our motherland is a garden, and the flowers in the garden are really bright. The warm sunshine shines on us, and everyone laughs ... "The last two sentences were heard when I was a child," The sunshine in Henan shines on us, and Americans laugh ",which was suppressed for many years. ...
73. Listen to Terry Lin's Love Song for Singles: "Love should be more frustrated and braver …" Listen to it as "Love should be braver …" Wow, such an open slogan!
74. Our dormitory said that the lyrics in Little Dragon Man were also misunderstood.
"I am a little dragon, little dragon, and I have many little boobs, little boobs."
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Listening to Tu Honggang's "Shaolin Wudang Kung Fu ~ ~", I always thought "Shaolin martial arts under the crotch"!
Until junior high school, I have been thinking about what kind of work it is to cover my crotch.
One of Jane Zhang's lyrics is "Happiness is doing what you love", which I understood in high school as "Happiness is doing what you love ……", and then I criticized the pornography at my deskmate for a long time.
When I was a child, I always listened to "the stars in the sky don't talk" as "the stars in the sky don't brush their teeth"
78 Jay Chou:
I will accompany you to the end. Can you not look back?
Keep listening
Can I carry you to the end without a ghost head?
You are my title song = You are my big brother pig.
Come back at 80, come back ...
My dad loves to shout this sentence ... Come on, the ghost is coming. ...
8 1 Always listen to the famous lyric "Who are you for?" As "Who are you and am I a ghost?"
82 Fish Leong's "Little Hands Reaching Far": There is stupid confusion in the diary. ...
I have been listening: there is a diary about Chris Lee's confusion.