On May 8, 2020, an employee of Bank of Ningbo Jiangbei Sub-branch jumped off a building due to excessive pressure. Judging from his wife's many times in Weibo about this matter, I can only think of one sentence: in the world of adults, there are no easy words.

The grievances and pressures of work are similar in the workplace. Between the lines, do we see our own shadow?

Under the working atmosphere of PUA (brainwashing in the workplace) for a long time, this employee may have lost himself and can no longer make objective judgments and the most basic cognition of himself. He pessimistically thinks that he has low IQ, low EQ and poor ability. If he resigns, it is uncertain whether he can find a better job after he loses his job. In addition, the resignation has long been defeated by reality.

Sometimes, facing the unknown is far more terrible than facing the immediate difficulties. It is obviously pessimistic to the extreme, but it is only superficial trouble to outsiders.

Perhaps in the eyes of friends and family, he is "rational". After all, the increasing unemployment rate has given many people a shot in the arm: their heads can be broken and their blood can flow, but they can't resign. After all, there is another saying that often refers to poisoned chicken soup: no job, no grievance.

02

On the morning of 20 17 12 10, the senior programmer of ZTE received a phone call from the company leader and learned that he was on the layoff list and his shares would be transferred at a low price. The middle-aged man took the elevator to the 26th floor of ZTE's headquarters, pushed open the window in the corridor, jumped and left this world.

As a graduate student of Beihang University, he is excellent and has been conscientious in his work. Even if layoffs, finding a better job is not a problem at all, but in the end, instant confusion has become his most fatal blow.

Perhaps unemployment is not terrible for him. The terrible thing is that he can't see hope. Although, when the sun rises tomorrow, the hope of a new day has also risen in Ran Ran.

Psychological research shows that men are most vulnerable at the age of 40. I think so, but all the old and young men in the family are the most vulnerable.

After all, too many of us are not the second generation with their own light, nor are we internet celebrities with unlimited traffic. Our goal is not poetry and distance, but how to solve the various expenses one after another every month.

In the eyes of outsiders, our strength may only be endless forbearance, burden and hard support. Even psychology has proved that men are fragile, but the word "fragile" is not allowed in men's dictionaries.

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Speaking of men's vulnerability, why not women?

A few years ago, Wanda female executives jumped off the building, which made many people sigh. When faced with the public criticism of the leaders attending the meeting and the obvious need to replace her position, she angrily left the meeting room on the spot: "I will not open this meeting today, I will quit!" " "

Later, the HR director met her and asked her to go to the coffee shop. The HR supervisor went to buy coffee, and when she came back, her descendants were gone.

The appointment of the personnel supervisor can be decided by the leaders at the executive meeting. It took only two hours from the time when the leader revealed at the meeting that he was going to change posts to the appointment of the personnel director. The leader is so eager, how can she not be chilling?

It only takes a few hours for a person to go from injustice, anger and disappointment to despair of the world. No one knows what kind of struggle she went through when she took that step.

Finally, all I left for my family was a sentence of self-blame: I'm sorry.

She loves her job and family, but the only thing she doesn't love is herself. How many people have been recruited at this point?

Such an excellent woman, even if she is dismissed, even if she leaves, you will still be you, you will still encounter more surprises, and there will still be one million possibilities in your life. Unless you are alive.

There are always some people in the workplace who can accept the recognition and praise of the leaders, but they can't accept a criticism from the leaders, and they can't accept the fact that the leaders have to get rid of themselves. After all, we still cannot afford to lose.

If you say you can't afford to lose, you have already lost. A really strong leader won't let you leave. If you leave, you should also thank him for giving you more choices. Really can't. Smiling at him is actually a powerful contempt.

04

A few days ago, a netizen sent me a private letter: this job seems to make me depressed. I work hard, but I still can't get the approval of the leader. I thought I had the highest performance and was isolated by my colleagues. The company is not big at first, but there are all kinds of intrigues every day. The boss is also a variety of paintings, brainwashing. You can talk to him about anything as long as you don't talk about money.

I want to resign, but I dare not. Afraid of not finding a job for too long, afraid of being looked down upon by others. Anyway, I think I can't hold on any longer, and I don't know what the meaning of life is. ...

Seeing this, I was lost in thought.

If a job has brought you to the brink of collapse, it is better to put yourself down and start over than to struggle with yourself. After all, there is no small matter in front of depression.

From the day we joined the company, each of us worked hard for a job, and at the same time placed high hopes on it, hoping to get recognition, love and support, until our hope was constantly destroyed and hit by reality, but we could only return to the original point: not being unemployed.

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What should we do in the face of layoffs, the disapproval of leaders, the pressure of work, and the units that want to escape but dare not?

First, work is important, but life is more important.

I read a sentence in The Reader the other day: The meaning of life may be to live with your heart, work hard and live well. In a word, it seems that we suddenly understand life.

Yes, it is alive, which is the most solid meaning of life, not success and fame. These lives will not bring what death will not bring.

Not everyone can tolerate PUA in the workplace. The atmosphere of some companies and the management style of leaders are like this, the survival of the fittest. If you are really bitter, you might as well take a step back. Tens of millions of unemployed people are really not bad for you every year.

Second, which should I lean towards, career or family?

A person can be a mountain, half the sky, and the pillar of the family. At work, we are just a screw. A machine without a screw will not have obvious influence, and your family will collapse without you.

Career is important, so is family. If you have to work hard for your family, please don't work too hard. Because the result of hard work is not necessarily what leaders want. If the leader is used to your efforts, a little slack will make the leader dissatisfied and think you have an idea. that this is not the important question. The point is that a little carelessness may kill us. Cases of overwork or sudden death under nervous pressure have long been common.

If Wanda female executives look down on their career and lean slightly towards the family between family and career, maybe the end of the matter is that she said to the personnel director, "Hey, it's just a job, but I'm not rare."

Just, there is no if in life.

Third, being laid off is not terrible. Accept it with the right attitude.

If being laid off is not your subjective reason, don't lose heart, hope is at the next corner; If so, don't be discouraged, reflect on yourself, change, improve and learn. Only in this way, you will have more choices and are unlikely to appear on the layoff list.

Being laid off is not terrible. What makes too many people uncomfortable is being laid off and facing unemployment. The ability to find a job is very important, but it is also affected by the whole environment. Faced with unemployment, it will make people a little scared, especially this year. Even if we survive this epidemic, what can stump us? We have no choice but to stand up and get through it.

The so-called growth is to bravely accept the fact that you are afraid but have to face, and your heart is full of frankness.

In addition, in the case of being laid off, we must try our best to get the economic compensation we deserve, and we must never be silent lambs.

Fourth, let exercise heal our fragile hearts.

Whether you are on the job, unemployed, comfortable in the workplace, or you don't know how many times you have called for resignation. Go to exercise, stick to it and make it a habit. Because dopamine is a good thing, it can make people feel happy and relieve stress and anxiety. Maybe one day, the pleasure and sweat after exercise will wash away your inner haze and let you find your future direction again.

Have you found that people who like sports also like to laugh? They love life, are optimistic, open-minded and fearless, which is enough to convince us to exercise.

Fourth, develop the habit of reading.

There are no more than three reasons for adults to study: first, learn to charge. Second, solve the problem. Third, hobbies.

If you are really not interested in reading and learning, you might as well read in two ways, with your own questions and doubts, looking for answers in the book, so that over time, you may love reading.

There is a Jenny Rosen in America who is depressed. In the process of struggling with depression, she wrote a book called "I am so happy", which is a book about how to create happiness. You might as well go and have a look. It is said that this book has occupied the bestseller list in The New York Times for nearly half a year.

5. Find your own sideline and cut yourself to the end.

You can have a main business, but you can't have a sideline. In the future, your identity can be inspirational and interesting: maybe you are a sales manager of a company, you are a writer, and you are a media expert. Let yourself cut to the end. This is the future trend.

Of course, if you make a sideline more brilliant than your main business, it is ok to turn it into your main business. The sideline is not brilliant enough. As long as you persist in your efforts, you can still find the meaning of struggle in the sideline. Even in the face of workplace pressure, workplace PUA, and company layoffs, you will not be willing to wronged yourself, nor will you feel bleak in the future. After all, you still have a card in your hand-sideline.

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Whenever, please remember: life is fair. When God closes one door for you, he will definitely open another door for you. It's just that sometimes I lower my head and miss that door. Please believe that there is another door, which will appear soon. ...

Life is too precious for us to trample on, let alone abandon. Only living is the strength in a person's bones. After all, life is given by parents, and we can only cherish it. This is respect for parents, respect for life and respect for yourself!

Life is too heavy, I wish you a happy life and a bright future.