The so-called temperament beauty is all thin.

Beauty always comes at a price.

If women are not cruel to themselves, men will be cruel to women.

Beauty is a must, regardless of age. There is no excuse to lose weight. If you can fatten yourself up, you will definitely lose weight. Women in their thirties should be smarter than girls in their twenties. You should know how picky this society is about women. Be thin and don't think too much.

Still thin! Or die!

Fat people with brothers and sisters! If you are fatter, your brothers and sisters will treat you badly! It's true that he said you were cute and fat, and that you were in perfect shape! You have no brain or anything! If your brothers and sisters are CMKG, do you look cute? ! !

No one can help you, you can only rely on yourself. If you don't want me to call you fat, stop eating and drinking from now on and go to bed when you are hungry!

Do you know that?/You know what? You look like an ordinary barbecue bag now!

Look at how well the beautiful women live. Why? The beauty is beautiful and natural, and can pick up more than 100 cars at a time. What about you? Dragging a bloated body and a thick coat trying to hide obesity to squeeze the bus? Or did I risk drifting in cold weather and drive late slowly?

I won't laugh at a woman's figure, I will laugh at the word temperance and self-knowledge in a woman's dictionary.

I tell you this is a cruel society. Don't think you have real skills. Appearance is more important.

If you tell me that you can't stand being hungry and ask me what to do, I can only say that you don't lose weight.

If a woman can't control her weight, how can she control her life!

Be sure to push yourself! Can't die!

Think about the supercilious look of the service girl in the mall.

There are many people around you who care about you, so just bear it.

In my twilight years, I recalled the past and suddenly found that my weight was never what I wanted. It's a pity that I haven't lost weight in this long life.

Humorous quotations about losing weight

1.50 years later, show your grandchild your slightly yellow wedding dress: Grandma's waist is only such a grip!

2. I think we should all act in a movie called "In those years, we girls who can't lose weight". ...

3. I originally planned to lose weight and turn it into lightning this year, which will make your eyes shine, and I don't want to become a nut wall and block your sight.

Don't wear green down jacket, it looks like watermelon, and don't wear red one, it looks like tomato. Not even yellow. Wear grapefruit or something. Don't wear white, put it on like cabbage. Don't wear black, put it on like a bear. And don't wear beige. Wear it like a potato. Even if you don't wear anything, you look like a steamed stuffed bun

Don't worry about spraining your ankle when you wear high heels.

6. Try to tie three or five sandbags to your legs. What's it like to go shopping with a heavy load?

7. I just want to play with water. How can I get stuck in the swimming ring?

8. I won't go to a men's clothing store to find a "women's dress" that suits me.

Thanks to being a fat man, he can pinch his stomach when he is sad.

10. Obesity is not conducive to the health of future babies.

1 1. Many people interpret "generosity" as "pregnancy".

12. It's easy to crowd buses and subways.

13. When you guide a guest to the sofa, you won't talk about him because of the two big holes above.

14. There are actually two children playing hide-and-seek with you!

15. Scientists say that the more overweight you are, the shorter your life expectancy will be!

16. When you go out romantically, you won't smooth the back belt of your boyfriend's bike.

17. Every big weight loss at a turning point in life has ulterior motives.

18. People who say I don't need to lose weight are all bad people.

19. It is an anecdote that Pavarotti collapsed the piano stool, and it is a joke that he went to a friend's house to collapse the chair.

20. The fat man's song of youth is really the adventure of meat buns.

2 1. Fat people can be confident of course, but if you can't lose weight, you'd better lose weight.

22. A fat man's life is like a measuring cylinder, destined to be read all his life.

23. The three most beautiful words in the world are not "I love you", but "you have lost weight".

24. Although I am a real Madrid fan, I still want to draw a line with Cristiano Ronaldo!

25. When I was fat, there was no one who disliked me. I will definitely repay you if I lose weight.

26. Go shopping with your boyfriend in summer, and he won't always want to walk in the shade behind you.

27. You have to pay more for smoking now. Who can say that after 20 years, it will not be stipulated that you should pay more when buying life insurance, because it is extremely important?

28. When learning snorkeling, no matter how hard the limbs are, they are all floating on the water. I was so angry that I wanted to throw myself into the river only to find that I still couldn't sink. ...

29. You know, it's a shame to say "Do you have any extra-large clothes" to the salesgirl. But "the clothes here are too fat" can be said with confidence.

30. People who come face to face turn around because of appreciation rather than curiosity.

3 1. In some places, when riding a hot air balloon, the weigher will write your weight on the back of your hand! ! !

32. Intimate contact on the beach was originally a romantic thing, but if you finally want to dig each other out of the sand, it is another matter.

33. Find a job you like, and you won't be rejected because of your size.

34. Prove your ability: You can do it, but you can't do anything!

35. Because you live on14th floor, you won't have the idea of hiding in a friend's house when you find a three-day maintenance notice posted at the elevator door.

36. Sitting in a small table and chair in a bar, you won't feel like playing bumper cars with people around you.

Humorous quotations in one sentence

1, I used to be young and energetic, but now my youth is gone, and I am so energetic.

You forget that there is no beautiful you in eternity, but as long as you are in the cycle of generations, that is enough for me!

3, the sky didn't fall on me, so it broke my heart and hurt my bones and muscles.

When we were young, we often made faces in the mirror. In old age, mirrors are flat.

5. Love is like icing on the cake. We swallow it and enjoy the sweetness of this moment.

What should I do if I am hungry? Come to the hot pot to rinse; What if I have no money? Find a fool to cheat; What if you have no guts? Go to the cemetery to practice; What should I do if I miss you? So send a text message and try it.

18, loneliness is a person's carnival, and carnival is the loneliness of a group of people.

19, junior high school physical education teacher said: Whoever dares to wear a skirt to my class again will be punished for handstand.

20. Unless the country changes its monogamy, I won't meet netizens.

2 1, boss, give me a sad haircut! thank you

22, love is like a fart, high-profile start, low-key end.

23, fart, bad heart; Do not fart, exercise; I'm going to fart, everyone. Fart rang, everyone applauded!

If you are worried or sad because I love you, nothing can replace my guilt. I'm sorry, what should I do to you?

25. The online girl turned around and scared a cow to death. Online girls look back and the Yangtze River flows backwards. Online girls turn again, and Halley's comet hits the earth!

26. What people want to see is not you at the starting line, but you at the finish line.

27. I'm so tired, I want to make a cut on the back of my head, and then collapse to the ground and install the piggy bank.

28, even wash your hair carefully, afraid of brain water.

Humorous short sentences (usually 60 sentences) shared after drinking alone at home.

Humorous phrases shared after drinking alone at home-1. Go back to Jialing River and drink it as soup.

2. A hundred rivers return to the East China Sea. When can I drink again? If you don't drink now, you will be sad later.

Would you like to be an old friend? You can also go drinking together if you are white.

4. I can't drink, I have no future, I only drink, and my promotion is unpredictable.

As long as you are in good spirits, drinking is like drinking water.

6. Shallow feelings, lick it.

7. It is rare to get drunk several times in life. If you want to drink, you must drink it properly.

8. Don't blame men for smoking and women for drinking. Smokers have stories. The drinker has something on his mind.

9. Youth is dedicated to a small wine table. Drunk is drinking!

10. swim all the way to the end against Yanghe Daqu.

1 1. I will never be your name when you are drunk. I'm just the woman who stood at the forefront of the years and grew up with you.

12. All rivers return to the East China Sea. When shall we drink again? If you don't drink now, you will be sad in the future.

13. When the wine enters the throat, there is a crack, as if singing in despair.

14. When the drinker rises to propose a toast, the person advised to drink will say, "The bottom is lifted, and it starts again", which means that the drinker has another drink. At this time, the drinker should respond, "When the ass moves, it means respect".

15. Two cups a day, you will feel uncomfortable if you don't drink it. The more you drink, the more you can drink. Don't come back until you're drunk.

16. Don't drink if you win, and cheat if you lose.

17. heartbroken drinking, drinking hurts the lungs, and finally heartless.

18. The mangroves in Qian Shan are full of mountains and clouds, and the wine is fragrant.

19. Drink, drink, drink, drink.

20. Alcohol consumption is courage, wine bottle is level, wine style is style, and wine virtue is morality.

Humorous short sentences shared after drinking alone at home 2 2 1. Ordinary women don't drink, and women who drink are unusual. I am a woman who drinks.

22. I have plenty of drinks. It's better to get drunk after a long night.

23. Half awake and half drunk, meet again in the dream.

24. Never drink again in my life. If you see me drinking, forget it.

25. Wine is the essence of food. The more you drink, the younger you get. It's a sin to drink or not.

26. Show your talents in the crisis. My sister drinks a cup of Song He for my brother.

27. When we get together, we are bosom friends. I'll start with two soothing drinks.

28. He told me that my stomach would hurt if I didn't drink, and I said that my heart would hurt if I put down my glass.

29. Buddies don't drink and have no good friends.

30. Too sentimental to drink.

3 1. Be careful when drinking, and don't get drunk after drinking.

32. Middle-level cadres don't drink alcohol and have no information at all.

33. From now on, throw away the wine.

34. One for you and one for me. Let's dance after drinking.

35. I have been in a daze for one year and half my life. Gain and loss never wake up, only a glass of wine is the most intimate.

36. The world is drunk and I wake up alone, so I have to wait on them again.

37. To make the guests drink well, the individual must drink first.

38. No drinking, no future;

39. Life is rare and you get drunk. If you want to drink, you must be drunk!

40. There are no clouds in the sky and the underground is dry. That cup doesn't count.

Humor phrases shared after drinking alone at home 3 4 1. The east wind blows and the drums beat. Now whoever's afraid of drinking, one for you and one for me. Who's afraid of drinking now?

42. Two or three performances a day, with four or five meals. Wine fields are like battlefields. Give your stomach to the party.

43. A woman who drinks wine pours affection, while she is drunk with love.

44. People are floating in rivers and lakes, so you can't drink too much.

45. A woman's love is like wine. The more it is brewed, the stronger it is. A man's love is like tea, the more it is brewed, the weaker it becomes.

46. No matter how hard life is, wine will choke, and nine times out of ten it will be unpleasant.

47. Leading cadres don't drink and have no friends.

48. The host raised his glass and said to the people present, "Women should open their mouths and men should go in."

49. Oh, let a man with spirit take risks where he wants to go, and never point his golden cup at the moon empty! .

50. The biggest pain-I am not drunk, I can't get drunk, I can only pay the bill.

5 1. If you don't drink, you will get nothing. It's really contradictory to let go of a bunch of friends after drinking.

52. In life, drinking is everywhere.

53. Drinking is an interesting thing. When I look back, I find that all our important decisions were made while drinking.

54. Brothers don't drink and have no feelings at all.

55. As long as you have it in your heart, tea is also wine.

56. What can't a glass of wine do? Two cups, if any.

57. Intentionally, everyone is tired, unintentionally, everyone is drunk every day. When the iceberg melts, you sleep well!

58. Never drink, but drink until you are unconscious!

59. Six sixes. Hello, brother! Who's afraid of who? Turtles are afraid of hammers!

60. As long as we have a good relationship, we can drink as much as we can.

A humorous sentence, a humorous classic quotation.

In a word, humorous classic quotations, excellent articles

1.c rummaged through QQ and couldn't find anyone to talk to.

2. Parents bring up hard, and only study hard.

I just wanted to be a quiet child, but I became what they called a cold woman.

Everyone says it's good to bask in the sun. It's getting dark these days and I haven't seen anything good.

The world is big, and a bed is small. The two people in the bed used to be fine, but they can't be old.

6. Brave men don't mention their bravery, and good women don't mention their embarrassment.

7. If a woman dares to go, she is sure that a man will turn back. Men don't look back, but they dare not leave because they are sure of women.

8. Compared with your heart, your penis is not as honest as yours.

9. Doing things may not be successful, just try your best. Don't ask too much in life, just be happy.

10. In summer, the vicious sunshine burned my unhealed wound.

1 1. A report card has destroyed the harmony of many families.

12. The most knowledgeable person is the warmest partner.

13. indisputable-indisputable-life is in vain, not bitter-not tired-life is tasteless.

14. What you are looking for is only the flowers on the other side, which are blooming in other places that can't be touched.

15. The fleeting time has brought something different, and you are still the same.

16. Don't be afraid, I'm not a good person.

17. Non-mainstream people either bow their heads or cover their mouths. Can you change anything?

18. People who care don't understand, and those who know don't care.

19. Our love turned to ashes before it solidified.

Fortunately, love is not everything. Fortunately, nothing is love.

2 1. The Tao lies in people walking, and everything depends on people; High-profile work, low-key life.

A humorous classic quotation

1. A despicable friend is more terrible than an honest enemy.

2. Find friends, boyfriends, kiss and hold hands, get married and have children.

3. True love is not afraid of the test of distance, and believes in the top.

I can choose to give up, but I can't give up my choice.

The person you like doesn't like you, even if people all over the world like you, you will be lonely.

6. Holiday life, a set of pajamas, a pair of splints, all day.

7. If you think, if you dream, you can rely on your thoughts and dreams.

I like to use spaces instead of all punctuation marks.

9. Tell me from the bottom of my heart that the air conditioner is good to have you, and how can I live without you!

10. A woman who doesn't take a shower won't smell good no matter how much perfume she wears.

1 1. Thanks to mental illness, the whole person is much more energetic.

12. Why does pangolin keep digging? Because I'm looking for Kawasaki.

13. After studying for more than ten years, I think kindergarten is better.

14. Old people can't make phone calls. Children can't fight. Women don't fight. Men. Fight to the death

15. My hobbies can be divided into static and dynamic. Static is sleeping, dynamic is turning over.

16. I bought a razor online, but my hands are shaking after shaving.

17. When I woke up this morning, I thought I had grown up. I took a closer look and found that the quilt cover was horizontal!

One sentence humorous classic quotations recommended articles

1. Stinky fart doesn't ring, loud fart doesn't stink, and serial fart stinks.

2. After a long time, I finally treat you as a normal person, and even looking at you feels redundant.

Jealousy won't happen to me. I'm glad you like it. If it's not mine, I don't want it.

Right or wrong, I prefer what I love.

Being casual doesn't mean having no temper. I never said I was a kind person.

6. Don't write about your love all day. I don't have that much time to pay attention to you, and the love I want is not just talk!

7. Thank you for letting go of the chain when I need you.

8. Although I watch movies, chat and play games in Weibo all day, I sleep hard the rest of the time!

9. Four words describe the separation of wives and children in different classes.

10. Once you like someone, your IQ will basically fail.

1 1. Love is a gamble. If you win, you will be together for life and grow old together. If you lose, you lose everything. Those who are closer than friends are all familiar strangers.

12. Please don't feel how unforgettable you are. The smile is real, not that I'm trying to be brave.

13. Spring breeze loves a hundred miles, and thousands of peach blossoms are not as good as you.

14. Those who keep saying that they are good for you are actually not. Remember one sentence, don't be simple!

15. You are my distant future and my unforgettable present.

16. Read-only, the moment we meet, I will travel through time and space for you. Stop complaining, this stubborn look, in a flash, things have changed.

17. Who failed to live up to his persistence, who stuck to his hoary head. You use silence to avoid me, then I will help you without contacting.

18. Don't get what you can't get. It's good to die alone.

19. It's normal to care about other people's opinions, but you have to understand that not everyone is human.

I don't take you seriously. I always look down on things that are too cheap.

2 1. Youth is a heavy rain. Even if you have a cold, I hope to take another bath later.

22. Bajie, I'm fighting the goddess Chang 'e, and I'll meet you in Gaolaozhuang later.

Beethoven told us that the more you recite, the more you score. This is the rule of remembering more.

24. The boy took his girlfriend for a walk and passed by the restaurant. My girlfriend exclaimed, how delicious! The boy with a hard bag said very gentlemanly, if you like, let's walk in front of the restaurant again.

I can assure you that the deepest and longest gaze in your life has been given to your mobile phone. I don't know what it's like to have thin legs, thin waist, thin hands and thin neck when I grow so big.

A humorous sentence, a classic quotation, is about mood.

A: I came home from work early and found that my wife was having an affair with my boss. B: Ah! A: I rushed back to the office immediately, and was almost discovered by the leader that I left early.

Twelve, forever, just a promise before the quarrel; Immortality is just a lie, I didn't see your truth.

Thirteen, you are the wind, I am, lingering into a sandstorm.

14. I used to regard you as my life, but now I smile at myself. You love him, not me. You are really blind.

Fifteen, cry to yourself and laugh to others. This is the so-called life.

Sixteen, brothers are brothers, and women are clothes. I'll strip anyone who touches my hands and feet.

Seventeen, neither cold nor hot, is the most comfortable temperature in nature, but in the emotional world, it is really the most desirable temperature.

When you can't hold on, you can tell yourself that I'm tired, but don't tell yourself that I can't.

Be hard on yourself now, and you will have a better chance of success in the future.

In fact, we are all just children. I'm just beginning to understand camouflage.

Twenty-one, freezing is not a cold, and the third floor of the lower abdomen is not greed.

Twenty-two, who does not learn to be strong when injured.

Twenty-three, now weigh it, and even want to pull out my eyebrows.

It is better to love others than yourself, at least you will never give up.

As you can see, 20xx is a funny sentence.

Funny humor, a word, a humorous sentence.

Funny and humorous, talk about excellent articles

1. If one day you leave me, I will stick to you like chewing gum.

2. People who love me, please continue. People who hate me, don't give up

If you choose to leave, never look back. Finally, we are old and dead.

I want to be the only one for you, so I can't copy and paste.

If you add me out of curiosity, don't play with fire.

Even if you are already taken, I will replace another flower with another.

7. I'm going to put you aside to dry and bring it back.

8. The red rose falls to the ground and becomes your wedding dress in heaven.

9. All shall be well that ends well for the rich, and the poor become house slaves.

10. I went too far in love and saw through all the scenery.

1 1. If you can't see me one day, I may come to see you at night.

12. In addition to beauty, there is also a shrew mentality. It seems that you love such people very much.

13. The person I love, I am willing to use my life to taste the joys and sorrows you gave me.

14. It takes no effort to really forget.

15. I fucking love you, but you fucking ignore me.

Funny and humorous, talk about classic articles

1. You have the right to hurt me, but I have no obligation to be hurt by you.

Please don't show up when I'm eating. I'm afraid I'll throw up in your face.

There will be light in your world, because the sun in my memory protects you.

I want to be the tooth in your mouth in my next life, because if I hurt you, it will hurt you.

That man dares to say that he is pure, and your eyes are cloudy.

Superman's briefs are very stable, which is why he flies so high.

7. My dream is to daydream in my dream.

8. benefactor, if you bully the poor monk, he will lose face to God.

9. A nearsighted person looks at you as a beauty from a distance, but it turns out to be a diaosi.

10. Don't push me, or I will get out of hand.

1 1. Don't think that just because you look like a wolf, I can treat you as a big pervert.

12. The sky is falling. Hold on, I'll find a stick.

13. Men and women quarrel. Men are like pistols and women are like machine guns.

14. Do you understand the feeling that wolves fall in love with sheep? That's just to eat its meat.

15. This morning in spring, I woke up carefree, yawned at home, couldn't sleep at night, and couldn't wake up during the day.

16. In fact, you have an advantage. Ghosts dare not run to your house at night.

17. I'm in a bad mood now, and I can't do anything but eat.

18. If the exam can be upgraded, I'm afraid I still have a negative score.

Funny and humorous, talk about recommended articles.

1. Every night, it feels like being buried.

People think I'm meditating, but I'm actually looking at whether I should pick up a hair on the ground.

Life is too short to be sexy or understand the hard life.

4. Heroes don't ask for a way out, hooligans don't look at their age!

I came quietly, walked quietly, waved a dagger, and left no one alive.

6. Life is really interesting because life is always playing with me.

7. I only trust two people in the world, one is me and the other is not you.

8. Why go when there is no way out? Just take the bus

9. Take off my clothes, I am an animal. Put on my clothes, I am the devil wears Prada!

10. Sleeping is an art, and no one can stop me from pursuing art!

1 1. God said there should be light, and I said I opposed it, so the world was dark.

12. Men conquer women by conquering the world! Women conquer the world by conquering men!

13. You fish and people eat you.

14. No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

15. Men have gold under their knees. I cut off my whole leg and didn't even find a copper coin!

16. It's better to learn Chinese for one year than to talk about QQ for half a year.

17. If my friends can sell them for five dollars each, I can make a small fortune.

18. Teacher, just follow the old lady! It's been a long time, teacher, please spare the old woman!

19. When I was a child, I thought I could save the world when I grew up. When I grow up, I find that the whole world can't save me.

20. It takes thousands of years to change from a monkey to a human, and only one bottle of wine is needed to change from a human to a monkey.

2 1. We can avoid everyone, but we can't avoid a fly. What makes us unhappy in life is often trivial things.

22. Stupid man+stupid woman = marriage; Stupid man+smart woman = divorce; Smart man+stupid woman = extramarital affairs; Smart man+smart woman = romantic love.

23. Women have countless QQ numbers just to flirt with a man. Men often use a QQ number to fill in all kinds of women.

24. The unfairness of this world lies in God's saying that I want light! So there was this day. Beauty said I want a diamond ring! So she bought a diamond ring. Rich people say I want women! So he had a woman. I said I want to take a shower! I can't believe the water stopped.