Positive and funny jokes (hot articles) 1. On the bus, the son asked his father, Dad, when will we get to the park? Dad said: the car will arrive when it stops! The son asked again: When does the bus stop? Dad looked at the driver and replied, "When we arrived at the park, the car stopped."
2. Shanglian: I am diligent in worrying about people and things, and I wake up in the middle of the night thinking that I am working. Bottom line: I really work the night shift for you every day and always want to get off work every day. Horizontal criticism: the exhausted old man has lost all his hair.
3. Travel, there is a temple in the scenic spot, so I will stop by the temple to play. When you buy a ticket, ask if you have a student ticket. The result of the conductor's answer is super classic. He said: all beings are equal before the Buddha, and there is no student ticket!
4. I fell in love with dice when playing cards, cups when drinking, quilts when sleeping, socks when wearing shoes, and became a prince when I was complacent. When I miss you, I think of your boys and old friends. How have you been recently? I wish you happiness!
The rabbit sneered at the tortoise and couldn't climb fast. In front of me, you will always be a supporting role. The tortoise said slowly, no matter how you run, you are just an animal. Can you be Liu Xiang?
6. Going to dinner with friends, the female colleague ordered a cup of papaya milk, and the waiter said with a straight face that it was gone. The female colleague glanced at her magnificent chest, and the waiter also glanced at her flat chest and said coldly, I didn't drink it all.
7. Have you eaten? I'll treat you to a big meal: steamed good luck, spicy good luck, Muslim peace, healthy vinegar, happy skewers, a plate of pistachios, a bottle of Wahaha and a cup of Coca-Cola. May you eat well and be happy every day.
8.Grey grabbed Meiyangyang too hard and got pregnant with Meiyangyang. Hongtaro was very angry when he learned about it. He slapped the ash with a pan. Grey is too cruel and wronged to say: Honey, I just want you to eat one more lamb. ?
9. Dad accompanied his son to the exam by bus, because the traffic jam was very slow. My son said anxiously, when we have money, we will buy three planes, one for work, one for school and one for the toilet. Dad is sweating: there is a toilet on the plane!
10. One day, the swan said to the toad, If I grew up like you, I would have died long ago. Toad said: The pig is still alive and well. The pig on the side said angrily, I'm reading the text message, and whoever is recruited has provoked anyone.
Positive funny jokes (classic) 1. Just went out? My father is Li Gang? When we were on the bus, everyone was talking about the progress of the case. My father is Li Gang? As voices broke out, an old lady said with a sad face. Alas, Li Gang is bitter, raising so many children at once! ?
2.？ I have been urged by my parents all my life. When I was a child, I was urged to get up early, study and go to bed early. When I grow up, I urge me to find a partner, get married and have children. I don't know what they can do after giving birth. ! ? Urge the child. ?
3. An elderly mother, to her daughter? Lofty and humble? Marriage grumbles: girl! Where are so many white horses? Might as well find a donkey to make do with it. Don't wait until one day all the donkeys are robbed, and it's even harder to leave only mules!
4. Hong Kong Customs found that a mother took her baby to and from the Mainland and Hong Kong many times a day, and her behavior was suspicious. The customs officer stopped her and asked, Why do you go back and forth so many times every day? Mom replied: I brought my children to feed milk powder!
One day, on the bus, I saw a pickpocket stealing a girl's bag, and a young man patted the girl on the shoulder on purpose. Xiao Li, I can find you. Where have you been? The thief was a little at a loss.
6. Take out your mobile phone and read jokes when you take the bus. Seeing a funny, laughing person all smoked. As a result, the uncle next to him said to others? Oh, look at that twitching little girl. Go and help her. ? It's embarrassing.
7. You don't have a deep understanding of the importance of learning, but I do. I heard that you are often absent-minded and doze off in class, which can't be done! Look at me, I have never dozed off in class since I was crazy!
8. One day on the bus, the passenger and the conductor quarreled over trifles, and the passenger scolded:? Whoever marries you will die for eight generations! ? Still unconvinced, go to the driver and let him judge. The driver said calmly, the conductor is my wife. ?
9. My mother kept losing at mahjong, so my father gave her several names, Chinese names? Lose a lot? Korean name? Gold often loses money? What's the Japanese name? Didn't win at all , Russian name? Have fun losing? .
10. Anonymous quarreled with her husband and was very angry. The younger brother comforted her and said that a woman like you has a small chest and a big temper, less money and more rules, is short and demanding. If a fool wants you, you should snicker. Don't make him angry! Is this your own brother?
Positive funny jokes (selected articles) 1. I saw a colleague holding a black Tibetan mastiff in the distance, fat and strong. I greeted him warmly: Hey, Brother Zhang, is the new Tibetan mastiff long-winded? Colleagues turn blue when they hear it? Looking closer, his wife is wearing a mink coat and tying her shoelaces.
2. Many times, when we register on the website, we find that the user name has been occupied and have to try a new user name. Tell you a never-ending method: conveniently add an SB after the registered name, and the registration is absolutely successful!
A bearded man squeezed the bus and accidentally dropped a box of cigarettes. An enthusiastic person picked it up and shouted at the bearded man who had squeezed into the car: Dude, your cigarette dropped. With a beard, he growled on the window, you? Castration? Yes!
Be an open person and don't go out if you have nothing to do. The world can't stand harm, and Furong becomes a slim girl. Xifeng moved to the United States, and the model of Brother Sharp got wind of it. I can't afford a panda, so I'm a tough guy. Not if you refuse!
5. Netizens feel the current situation of anti-corruption: first, they rely on media attention, second, they rely on beautiful women to take off their pants, third, they rely on uncles to show off their wealth, fourth, they rely on house sisters to change their households, fifth, they look at official sex scandals, sixth, they look at Lankao helplessly, seventh, they have no way to cry when petitioning, and ninth, they look at forced demolitions!
6. I just talked to my happy boss. He wants to give you the happiness of being a younger brother, the wealth of being a follower, the happiness of being a best friend, the safety of being a best friend, the health of being a wife, and the good luck of being a mistress. what are you reading? Thank you quickly!
7. You are beautiful. This is my conclusion after seeing Xifeng. You are really introverted. This is my conclusion after seeing Gan Lulu. You are really rich. This is how I feel after I met Brother Sharp. Seeing how good you are, you should be happy every day and always smile.
8. As soon as I got on the bus, I heard someone shouting: Come to the front to buy tickets. ? I said angrily, why don't you come back? Answer in advance: I'll go in the back. Why don't you drive? It turned out to be an unmanned ticketing car, calling not the conductor but the driver.
To tell you the truth, I am very satisfied with the bride on the wedding day. It was her best day, but when the master of ceremonies asked, groom, would you like to marry the bride? I hesitated, but remained silent. After all, I'm just the best man.