This article is a postscript for the translator of Seven Rules of Getting a Happy Marriage, which has been modified. Published in Yiwenzhi 1 1 monthly. As a translator, I sincerely hope this book will be helpful to everyone. Before my husband and I got married, he took me to visit my elders. At that moment, I deeply realized that love can be a matter for two people, but marriage is a matter for two families or even two families. There is definitely a difference between love and marriage, but directly treating them as opposites and declaring that "marriage is the grave of love" goes to the other extreme. For me, I prefer to accept Mr. Bing Xin's famous saying about marriage: marriage is the beginning of love that combines soul and flesh. It is precisely because everything related to the material body, daily necessities, must appear in marriage, which makes many lovers who are addicted to intimate relationships and love each other unable to accept these trivial things in marriage, but C'est la vie (this is life). Whether we like it or not, this is life. Therefore, before we can change our lives, perhaps we should change our preconceived ideas about marriage, especially our ignorance of marriage, so as to truly and effectively understand the beauty of marriage. Different from the habit of China people who don't want to expose their dirty linen, foreigners are used to all kinds of psychological counseling. When they feel that there is something wrong with their marriage, they are also willing to consult relevant experts, and we can only talk to very few confidants. The author of this book, Dr. John Goldman, is the most famous authority on marriage and family in the United States and one of the directors of the Seattle Institute of Marriage and Family. Dr gotman regards marriage and family as a scientific research project. In this institute, he not only receives all kinds of couples who come to consult and deals with their problems, but also follows up the couples who leave this institute to see the effect of marriage therapy. It is precisely because of more than ten years of follow-up investigation and research that Dr. Goldman's advice on marriage is not just an armchair strategist like many marriage counseling experts, but full of practical wisdom. For example, if we are asked what a happy marriage is, we may think that we are happy without quarreling at the first time, but this is just a misunderstanding of marriage. Dr. gotman pointed out in "Seven Rules for Getting a Happy Marriage" that quarrels will inevitably occur in a happy marriage, but compared with those unfortunate marriages, these quarrels are only practical and will not rise to an insult to the other person's personality. This is actually very difficult to do, just like there is no need to simply punish a child. However, when we spank him, we can't help saying things like "you are worthless", which is the real harm. I think the greatest help of Dr. gotman's book is not to sum up the solutions to marriage problems into seven rules, but to help us understand marriage correctly by correcting some of our misconceptions. What he provided us was a marriage guide to read before marriage. I have only been married for more than a year, and I dare not rashly declare that I have become an expert on marriage issues by translating this book. However, personally, after reading Fromm's The Art of Love, I feel that love is far more difficult than we thought, while after reading Seven Rules of Happy Marriage, I feel that it is not difficult to have a happy marriage. Indeed, as Dr. gotman said, we will read the instructions before using something, but we will not think of having a basic understanding of marriage before getting married. This is actually a misunderstanding.