people like to associate with people with good character, while those with bad character will eventually be spurned.
so how can you tell a person's character in a short time? There is a book gentleman to give you advice.
1. Look at what he said.
As the ancients said, "You can spit roses as well as briers." Words reveal a person's character.
A few days ago, it was a hot summer. We talked about couriers and food delivery workers, saying that they all earned hard money, and they had to run on the road whether it was extremely hot or rainy.
Just as we were feeling that life was not easy, a colleague didn't agree. She said that people are divided into three classes, and they have no ability and background. If they don't work as couriers, what else do they want?
Another colleague is outspoken. She said that we should not look down on people like this. We are not much better than them. Although people are coolies, they all make money by their own sweat. Hearing this, you Shujun didn't want to say anything more.
modest people don't talk big, and practical people don't talk nonsense; Gentle people don't swear;
a moral person will never swear. Therefore, if you want to see a person's character in a short time, you might as well listen to what he says with your heart.
2. Look at the details
Sima Qian once said: Small things see the pattern, and details see the character. In the face of right and wrong, people often deliberately "decorate", while some small details are often ignored. However, it is these undisguised details that can best show a person's true colors.
You Shujun's mother was once very close to an aunt. The aunt spoke very well and we all liked her.
but after a while, my mother stopped seeing her.
I just found out after asking, once, my mother and aunt went shopping together and bought a big bag of fruit for them to share at home.
Later, my mother found that she gave all the good ones to herself, and all the small and bad ones to her mother.
Therefore, the best way to see a person's character in a short time is to look at the insignificant little things and details related to it.
3. Look at an emergency
In an emergency, people will instinctively react. These instinctive reactions may be deeply hidden by people, but they can best explain a person's character. There is a book that tells two personal experiences.
A few years ago, Shu Jun went out to play with his relatives and family.
At that time, my relatives just bought a new car, and I was sitting in the back seat with Dabao and my relatives. I didn't know that all of a sudden, Dabao spilled all the milk on his hand, and my pants with my relatives were all wet. The milk also penetrated into the gap between the sofa and the backrest, and it took a lot of effort to clean it.
at that time, I grabbed the baby's milk in a hurry and scolded loudly, and the baby cried with injustice.
On the contrary, she is a relative. While protecting the children, she advised me that it was no big deal.
Another thing is a typhoon that Shu Jun experienced in 213.
At that time, we were still running a business. Suddenly, the whole office building was like an earthquake, and the front and rear glass walls were all blown down. The front and rear storms were caught together, and Shu Jun and a female colleague hugged each other tightly, shaking with fear.
At that time, the boss was in the office next door, and his office suffered the same destruction. A bookcase was blown to the ground, and no one could predict what would happen next second.
but I remember very clearly that the boss came to our office as soon as something happened to ensure our safety.
after experiencing these two things, you will know that your reaction and instinct in an emergency are the expression of your character, which is the most deceptive.
So, if you want to see a person's character in a short time, you might as well "artificially" create an emergency and see the other person's reaction, so you can see his character roughly.
4. Look at the moment of interest
The conflict of interest is like a touchstone, which can often reflect the true form of character. As the saying goes, a brand is like a character. Why? Because when playing cards, there is a conflict of interest between them.
Take playing cards as an example. If no matter whether you win or lose, you don't show great joy and anger. This kind of person is more broad-minded.
There is a card friend of Shujun. Every time she plays cards, she is relaxing the atmosphere. No matter whether she wins or loses money, she won't care too much.
In life, she is an easy-going and optimistic person.
On the contrary, as soon as some people lose money, or don't paste cards for a long time, they will start to complain about others, complaining about this and that. Most of these people are haggard and impatient.
Someone did an experiment about honesty. In a small shop, the experimenter asked the store to look for 5 yuan more in the change, and tested the honesty through the buyer's practice.
Some scholars think that this experiment is also suitable for testing personality.
Although it's 5 yuan's small money, whether it's pocketed or coming clean, the two choices reflect completely different attitudes towards life.
Therefore, if you want to see a person's character in a short time, the above two methods are good.
In fact, all through the ages, whether in life or in the workplace, those who can be invincible are those with good character. Therefore, whether it is spelling ability, spelling performance, spelling background, in fact, in the final analysis, it is still character.
Some scholars think that a gentleman means righteousness, while a villain means profit, so you should never lose your character for petty gain.
A person's character is often reflected in the details of life. There are three aspects to see a person's character in a short time:
First, speaking: 1. Humility, not swearing; Rigorous, not abusive; Speak face to face, tell the truth; Civilization, speaking without dirty words; At first glance, you should ask your name, and you should answer without your name; Not arrogant, talk to people and ask more questions; Don't speak ill of others behind their backs, but talk more about their advantages; Improper "microphone", no right and wrong, no rumors; If you don't understand or pretend to understand, you should not be ashamed to ask questions; Say thank you when you accept others' help; Civilized language often says: please, hello, thank you, you're welcome, I'm sorry, it doesn't matter, excuse me, borrow the road, excuse me, ask for advice, please, goodbye and so on.
2. Treat people: respect and care for the elderly, and don't grab the road, give way, give up your seat, tea and food; Respect leaders without losing etiquette and treat colleagues with mutual respect; Take the initiative to change slippers when entering other people's homes; Don't touch other people's things without permission; Always face others with a smile; Promise others not to be late, and the most important thing is to borrow money and return it on time! ! .
3. Morality of public places:
No loud noise in public places; No littering; No spitting; Get on the bus and consciously queue up without crowding; Dining in a restaurant is not loud and small; Cherish public property when staying in the hotel, and don't use pillow towels or sheets to polish shoes; There is also walking the dog with a rope! ! !
there are many seemingly insignificant actions, and a sentence that sounds indifferent can reflect a person's quality.
how to see a person's character in a short time?
first, active interaction. If you move around too much, you will inevitably show your true nature.
second, have dinner together. Observe his table manners and see if he knows humility.
third, travel together. Observe his ability to improvise and see how he handles things when they meet.
fourth, meet friends together. See if his interaction with friends is sincere and popular with everyone.
fifth, if the other person is a man, it depends on whether he respects the elderly. If the other person is a woman, it depends on whether she likes children. Men and women who respect the elderly and like children are kind at heart.
It's hard to get to know a person in a short time. You can only see your character through experience. Take your time.
1. See how he feels about his parents. How bad can a person be if he is filial to his parents?
2. Look at his attitude towards money. If he is selfish, he can't be intimate! If you are generous, it means that this person is not haggle over every ounce, but it should also be carefully distinguished. Some people don't like to owe others, and they don't like others to owe themselves. Such people belong to normal! Don't ask too much. However, there is a kind of person who likes to be a big-tailed wolf. Don't fraternize! Or you'll have to wipe his ass for life!
3. See if he changes his mobile phone number frequently. If a number has been used for a long time, it means that he is not in debt or in debt, and he is a nostalgic person. Such people value feelings!
4. Don't get to know a person from other people's mouths, which is the most unreliable! You need to observe with your own heart!
In a short time, it is unrealistic to see a person clearly, but you can see the basic quality and accomplishment of this person through some small details in life. If the quality and self-cultivation are acceptable, the tone of this person's life will be similar, so what about those details?
Eat a meal
Let him decide everything, choose the place, the kind of food, the environment he chooses, the process of ordering food, the attitude towards the waiter, the quality and quantity of ordering food, whether he is worried about waste and needs to pack after eating, who will pay the bill, how much he spends, whether he will listen to your opinions, whether he will think of you, etc. A person who will only think of himself, no matter what he does. This meal, which takes about an hour, can give you a preliminary understanding of your friends.
The main purpose of visiting his parents
is to see his attitude towards his parents and his current life. In fact, a person's dress shows many problems, especially hairstyle and shoes, which can reflect a person's taste and preferences from the side. Let's look at his parents, who are the children's first teachers, and we can get a general understanding of him from their attitude towards others.
it takes time to get to know someone. It is a wise saying to see people's hearts for a long time. Everything takes time. Take your time and don't delay your youth because of a temporary judgment. Time flies, there is no time to turn back.
In a short period of time, we can focus on the following aspects: First, the attitude towards the superior and the inferior (to the rich and the poor). There is little difference between a person with good character and a poor person and a rich person. It is impossible to say that there is no such thing. A person with unreliable character looks like a grandson to the top and a Lao Tzu to the bottom. Friends are only bigger than themselves, have more money than themselves, have no feelings for the people and have no sympathy for the poor.
second, you don't keep your word. People with good character will not talk big, talk too much, and do what they say. People with unreliable character dare to talk, talk, talk, and make promises that have long been forgotten. Whether they can say it or not is an important criterion to measure a person's character.
thirdly, is it full of lies? Whether the character is good or not, the real word is the most important, first of all, it must be true, and only the truth will have sincere feelings. If a person is full of lies, there are several versions of one thing, and what he said before becomes another story later, such a person is definitely unreliable.
fourth, is it a simple message? People with good character generally don't ask about other people's private affairs, don't talk about people behind their backs, and don't gossip. Those who dig their brains to find out about Zhang's parents and Li's shortcomings, talk about things from the east to the west, love to expose others' shortcomings, vilify others, and intentionally or unintentionally reveal others' privacy will not be much better.
there are many ways to look at the character, but they are always the same. Ta's character is hidden in his behavior.
1. Look at the character, just the details. Everyone has a disguise, which, intentionally or unintentionally, will affect your judgment of Ta. But this influence can only be short-lived, and with contact, many details will be exposed.
Because details can be seen everywhere, you can see something when you walk, talk or even look at it. As long as you observe it carefully, a hypocrite can easily see it.
2. Look at the people around Ta. Birds of a feather flock together, and it is not unreasonable for people to be divided into groups. Like-minded, can play together, otherwise it is lovers.
3. Besides, you have to have a delicate heart and be good at observing. If you are careless, you have to pay more attention.
The above personal opinions are welcome to add
personality. Together, they are
the first trends and behavior habits in three fields. His habit casts his behavior, such as spitting, which we usually say, which shows that he doesn't pay attention to hygiene, brings disgust to others and affects children. This kind of person is a self-centered, I can do whatever I want, regardless of other people's feelings and has no sympathy for others.
second dress. A person who dresses in fashion shows that he insists on his own way, is not changed by other people's strange eyes, and is more determined.
People who wear ordinary clothes and are conservative are basically stiff. They are honest and patient.
People who dress casually are lazy and like to meditate.
the third talk. A person who speaks calmly and slowly is thoughtful and patient.
People who speak in a low voice are physically and mentally exhausted, and they are people who have obstacles in choosing.
people who talk loudly and angrily have dual personalities, are not practical and tell too many lies.
how to see a person's character in a short time? We can learn from the details of a person's parents, friends, ordinary people and ordinary things.
filial piety is the key to a person's character. Is he a dutiful son at home, amiable to his parents and family?
By looking at a person's personality, we can learn about the person, the friends he has made, and how his friends commented.
it doesn't matter whether a person has ability or not, but character is very important. A person's personality and character can be expressed in all the details when he treats some ordinary people and handles some ordinary things.
whether a person is selfish or not determines a person's character. A selfish person always thinks about his own interests and can't do anything good.
a person with a good character thinks of others everywhere, cares for others, and helps others regardless of his own interests.
I'm Nie Feng, a sincere and kind person. I know my horse power from afar, and I've seen people's hearts for a long time. Good character makes good popularity, and a person's character is more important than ability. Not afraid of real villains, but afraid of hypocrites. Be kind to others, be sincere to others, and be a sincere and kind person.
Character is a person's background color. In this complicated and materialistic era, people are eager to return to the original life, and at the same time they are eager to deal with people with simple hearts. But people's hearts are separated from each other, and it is not easy to see what is hidden in a person's heart. As an experienced person, I would like to share my personal suggestions:
1. You just want to be friends and colleagues with him/her
1. Listen to his/her words and deeds. Confucius said, "How can people be embarrassed to see what it is, what it is and what it is safe for?"? People are awkward? " It means: "To understand a person, we should look at his motives of words and deeds, observe the road he takes, and see what he is doing with peace of mind. How can this person hide?" How can this man hide? " First of all, listen to what he/she says, saying that it is a great learning, and the tongue is the smallest but also the largest in the hundred. If a person often lies, jokes regardless of occasion, talks nonsense or swears at each other, then alienate him! A white lie book