No leaves in the world are exactly the same, and the same is true for people. Everyone’s experience is unique. At the same time, everyone's "three views" are not exactly the same. At most, they are just what Confucius said is "harmony without difference": they are consistent in large aspects, but different in details.

What are the "three views"? The popular understanding is world view, outlook on life and values. In recent years, statements such as "the three views are destroyed" and "the three views are not correct" have become common on the Internet. Destruction of the three views refers to those people, things or things that subvert the general views of most people; incorrect three views refers to the negative impact that some people's words and deeds in society have on society.

I often hear people say that "the three views are not correct", but do you know what determines the "three views"? In fact, a person's "three views" are mainly affected by these three aspects, and the "three views" exactly correspond to a person's life pattern and height of occurrence, which is very accurate! Let’s take a look below!

1. Relatives, friends and other people around you;

"Warring States Policy" records a famous fable - "Three men become tigers". The minister said to the King of Wei: "If one person said that a tiger appeared in the market, would the king believe it?" King Wei replied: "I don't believe it." The minister asked again: "If two people said that a tiger appeared in the market, would the king believe it?" King Wei said Said: "I will have some doubts."

The minister then said: "If a third person appears and says there is a tiger in the market, will the king believe it?" King Wei replied: "Of course I will believe it!" The minister said: "Obviously, there will be no tigers in the market at all, but after three people spread the word, it seems that there really are tigers in the market."

In fact, this is also the case in real life. We get Some of my experience and skills in doing things, as well as my understanding and judgment of things, are often heard from relatives and friends around me. It can also be regarded as hearsay from my seventh aunt, eighth aunt, or a certain colleague.

If we do not have our own independent thinking and opinions, over time, our values ??will be gradually homogenized by those around us, and we will become what everyone else says. We will follow what others do, and we will do the same. For example, when you see people around you getting married and having children, you get married and have children too; when you see people around you taking out loans to buy cars and houses, you feel embarrassed and pretend to be fat to buy them.

This is like being kidnapped by some invisible "social morality". You get on the bus without knowing it, and you have no idea where you are going and what your purpose is. Some people think this way: since everyone is like this anyway, it shouldn’t be wrong; even if they are wrong, everyone is wrong together, and they can still comfort themselves and deceive themselves.

But as Mr. Lu Xun said, "It has always been like this, is it right?"

Just imagine: If society does not have innovation and breakthroughs, wouldn't it become a stagnant water? What is the difference between one more person and one less person? Therefore, only the weak like to hug together for warmth, for fear that they are different from those around them, and strive to have their three views consistent with the environment. Cattle and sheep only travel in groups, only wild beasts like to travel alone!

Writer Jiang Fangzhou has a famous saying: "Read more books, otherwise your three views will be determined by your relatives and friends!" This sentence sounds very heart-breaking and enlightening. , even more pointedly pointed out: People who listen to their relatives and friends around them and have no opinions of their own are very scary, like a child who will never grow up.

Even if you always listen to the words of relatives and friends around you, it is easy to make mistakes. For example, if you start a business, no one around you is starting a business, and they all have stable jobs. Therefore, they all advise you not to bother with it, and even exaggerate the risks to you infinitely, and then add, "It's all for your own good."

However, when it comes to making money, we must not listen to the opinions of an ordinary person. If his opinions are really useful, he himself will not live an ordinary life. If you have relatives and friends around you who have made money or are successful, you can listen to their advice appropriately; otherwise, don’t listen to other people’s opinions easily, after all, their cognitive level is also very limited.

2. Internet;

In today’s society, values ??are not only affected by relatives and friends, but also by social media such as the Internet. A few days ago, I saw such a heart-wrenching sentence, "In the past, relatives were all relatives, but now some relatives are, to put it harshly, just passers-by who are somewhat related by blood!"

Why did it happen so early today? What about this phenomenon? It’s because people nowadays spend a lot of time and energy playing with their mobile phones, watching short videos, live broadcasts, chicken soup for the soul, etc. on the Internet. A person's life can be very fulfilling, so his dependence on family ties becomes weaker and weaker, and he is less affected by family ties and friends.

Where you spend your time is where your success lies. In the same way, if you are frequently exposed to the Internet, your values, good or bad, will be inadvertently affected by the content you see on the Internet. For example, some emotional masters like to make some "poisonous chicken soup" that calls men bad and encourages women to be selfish. Many brainless people believe it, and if they are used in real life, they will be confused.

Why are there more and more scumbag men and scumbag women nowadays? On the one hand, it is the result of their parents educating them to be selfish since childhood, and on the other hand, it is the bad influence of the Internet’s poisonous chicken soup about “refined egoism”.

There are some negative and bad values ??on the Internet, but they often touch people's emotions. In addition, many people have poor discernment, so they are easily affected by Internet values.

Many people regard what they see on the Internet as reality, regard some emotional complaints specially written by jokers as their own guide to love, and regard some marketing accounts launched for marketing purposes. "When a girl is angry, she should give her lipstick" and "empty the shopping cart" to guide her actions, as well as what some emotional bloggers say: "long legs, good temper, good at dressing up, good at hurting people, and her hands are particularly beautiful." Boys "use it as their own criteria for choosing a mate" and so on.

If your thoughts are easily changed by a piece of online content, it means that you have no thoughts at all and do not have stable values ????on the Internet. Values, then your ideas are always being influenced by others, your opinions are always being influenced by others, and your thoughts are always being manipulated by others. However, others will not be responsible for you at all, so only you can be responsible for yourself. , a person's formation of independent values ??is the first step towards maturity!

3. Read and study;

It also said "Read more books, otherwise you will "Three views are determined by your relatives and friends." It can be seen that reading and studying can increase knowledge, improve cognition, and form one's own independent values ????through independent thinking and perception.

Francis Bacon in "On Reading" It is said that "reading history makes people wise, reading poetry makes people intelligent, mathematics makes people precise, philosophy makes people profound, ethics makes people cultivated, and logic and rhetoric make people eloquent." Therefore, reading and studying play an important role in cultivating people's values. Function.

Our ancient sages also warned people to read more and then change their thoughts and temperament. For example, "people's temperament is inherently difficult because of their nature." Change, only reading can change your temperament."

Books are the ladder of human progress. Reading classic books is like talking to many great and noble souls. From them, we can obtain the enduring and righteous path of the world. It is the correct value of vicissitudes of life. Moreover, the more books we read and the more truths we understand, the wider our horizons and landscape will be. Therefore, people who read more will feel that they are insignificant and ignorant, and then behave in a humble and low-key manner. < /p>

As Liang Wendao said in "The Meaning of Reading": "Reading is to challenge what you originally believed and to subvert your own cognition. The more we read, the more we know our limitations. ”

So, if we continue to read and read good books, we will continue to nourish ourselves, improve our own limitations, and correct our own mistakes, so that our values ????will become more and more consistent with the eternal "Tao", and we will become more and more enlightened. Close to the truth and success. A person who can truly read is knowledgeable and knowledgeable, and has accumulated a lot of knowledge. "Traveling thousands of miles is not as good as reading countless people; reading countless people is not as good as being guided by a famous teacher, and being guided by a famous teacher is not as good as enlightening yourself." It can be seen that it is not enough to just study hard. It must be combined with social practice and communicate with different people. , broaden your knowledge. Only in this way can you connect various knowledge, apply what you have learned, and maximize your effectiveness.

However, reading is the foundation for solidifying values. If you don’t have this foundation, just listen to your relatives. No matter what your friends say, if you only learn some fragmented knowledge from the Internet and drink some chicken soup that is difficult to distinguish between true and false, you will be led by others and have no backbone.

In summary. As mentioned above, a person's "three views" are mainly affected by these three aspects - relatives and friends, the Internet, and reading and studying. Find out which one you belong to! Moreover, what determines your "three views" also corresponds to that! It depends on the pattern and height of your life. Therefore, we finally calm down and read more good books to enrich our souls, cultivate our temperament, and cultivate independent values.

Friends, what do you think?