Mainly learned

(1) How should we better face the pressure of employment and studies.

When we face stress, the usual ways of coping include over-preparation and procrastination. The best way to deal with it is to make a plan and complete it step by step.

What are the consequences of poor handling? For example, I tend to like to escape when faced with pressure, or procrastinate until the last minute. The results of doing so are very bad.

1. It affects the progress and cannot complete the task; 2. It makes oneself sink into a negative emotion; 3. Interpersonal relationships are affected because one does not pay attention to other people's feelings; 4. Physical and mental health are both adverse effects.

Therefore, you must change the way you deal with stress.

(2) Let’s talk about why we choose to escape when we encounter stressful tasks?

The role of negative reinforcement---

For behaviors that are consistent with organizational goals, withdraw or weaken the original negative stimuli or conditions to increase the frequency of these behaviors. For example, when writing a paper is very painful and I don’t want to write it, I say that I will play with my mobile phone first and then write, since I still have time anyway. By playing with mobile phones, I transferred the pressure of writing the paper and temporarily relieved the pressure. However, the paper task was delayed again and again, and no progress was made. The result of such negative reinforcement is a continuous vicious cycle.

On the contrary, it is the effect of positive reinforcement. For example, if you complete a task and you are rewarded with time and opportunities for entertainment and shopping, it can often motivate you to complete new tasks one after another.

Therefore, in the face of procrastination, I must break out of the vicious cycle of negative reinforcement.

One thing to remember is that "I don't want to do it at the moment" does not mean "I can't do it at the moment." This is often an excuse for yourself to escape from task pressure. For example, I feel so tired that I won’t write a paper today. This is just because I think I can’t write today, but in fact I can still write. Even if I only write for 20 minutes (forcing myself to set a time period), it is far better. Yu doesn't do it. Because this is a kind of positive stimulation, you can continue to practice by doing only a few tasks, and do not let your "willfulness" go.

(3) Emotional management

1. Don’t be harsh on yourself. This does not mean letting yourself go, but changing the way you talk to yourself. I always keep saying, I'm so stupid, I don't know anything, why not stop complaining and see what improvements I can make. Because complaining only has a negative effect and cannot solve any problems.

2. Mindfulness-based stress reduction (consciously observing an object, living in the moment, paying attention to what is happening, without making judgments). Essentially, distract yourself by looking at things carefully. For example, when eating, carefully look at the structure of the rice, observe the color, taste, etc., observe carefully, and focus on chewing slowly, which can transfer the current bad emotional state.

The teacher gave the example of a: The thoughts are too complicated and are about to explode. Let all kinds of thoughts fall like fallen leaves. Pay attention to the falling process, but do not follow it. b. Think of thoughts as moving trains. Watch the train passing by, but don’t get on the train.

3. Statistical rules of emotions. The duration of an emotion lasts about 90 seconds (eg, depressed, happy). Don't stir up emotions and strengthen them after they come. Don't be too harsh and give your emotions some time to express.

4. Improve your mood well through regular exercise. Research has found that exercise produces dopamine and endorphins, which have antidepressant effects.

5. Build your own value on multiple dimensions. Don't put yourself entirely on the weight of one value, as it is easy to go to extremes. The value dimension can be the love of parents, lovers, self-requirements, friends, favorite things, hobbies (many kinds, preferably those that bring a sense of accomplishment), great ambitions, etc. In this way, you will not lose hope in life when you are frustrated in one aspect.

(4) Suggestions on dealing with procrastination.

Emotionally, you can write procrastination cards and ask yourself what supports me in procrastinating this task. What reasons can you give me to do it now?

Can I take even a small step now, even if the circumstances are not ideal?

What would happen and how would I feel if I took a small step?

If I don’t do this now, what will happen and how will I feel?

By writing down these problems, you can prevent yourself from being too emotional, so that you can face the task rationally and start taking action.

To deal with procrastination, you need to draw up a plan that conforms to the smart principle (the principle of goal management), that is, the plan setting must meet: s stands for specific, which means that the performance appraisal must target specific work indicators and cannot General;

m stands for measurable, which means measurable, meaning that performance indicators are quantitative or behavioral, and data or information to verify these performance indicators are available;

a That is, attainable, which means achievable, which means that the performance indicators can be achieved with hard work, and avoid setting goals that are too high or too low;

r means relevant, which means relevance, which means that achieving this goal is related to The correlation of other goals;

t is time-based, which means it is time-limited and focuses on the specific deadline for completing the performance indicators.

After the plan is set, it is to complete the decomposed tasks on time and in quantity within the specified time, and to defeat each new task step by step.

(5) Summary

0. You can draw pressure circles (events that caused your negative emotions?); use 0 to 10 points to evaluate the pressure of each circle. (the assessment itself can alleviate some of the pressure); choose a circle with greater pressure, immerse yourself in it, and write down what is in your mind at the moment; ask yourself how u feeling now and how should I do to deal with it?

1. A sentence

Action comes before motivation - this famous saying perfectly reflects the importance of action

2. Ask yourself, what you need to learn What are the skills, resources, and personal attributes required? ——

After knowing, make a plan/time management/emotion management (self-acceptance; positive self-talk; mindfulness techniques; cognitive restructuring)/self-discipline in the entire plan implementation process

Good habits contribute to good emotions and mentality, and affect the success of your life plan

l Regular work and rest

l Healthy diet

l Regular Do exercise

l Have appropriate entertainment and relax

l Keep doing important things

l Maintain friendly interpersonal relationships