I read a question on Zhihu: What is the greater realization when people reach middle age?

One upvoted answer is:

Half my life has passed, and I have finally seen the truth of life, learned to act soberly, and live in confusion.

I deeply agree.

Human life is actually two things, one is to do things, and the other is to be a human being.

Doing things is the foundation of one's life, and being a human being is the foundation of one's life.

Having both is a person’s greater wisdom.

1

Working soberly is the skill

When we were young, we were high-spirited, rampant and fearless.

Even if his head is broken and bleeding, he refuses to surrender, thinking that everything is under control.

As we get older, the burdens on our shoulders become heavier and heavier, and the world we face becomes more and more complex.

So I slowly understood that life requires not only courage, but also wisdom.

In the TV series "Dajiang Dahe 2", Song Yunhui, played by Wang Kai, was appointed as the deputy director of Donghai Chang because of his outstanding business ability.

Song Yunhui devoted himself to his work, but because of his uprightness and recklessness and his lack of attention to work methods, he was quickly ostracized and isolated by the entire unit.

In order to apply for the East China Sea project, he offended Director Lu and the leaders of the Ministry of Chemical Industry.

Subsequently, two anonymous letters appeared one after another, reporting problems in his life and work.

Song Yunhui was isolated and struggling.

At this time, he remembered the words of his old leader, Secretary Shui:

"Society is made up of the masses. Some people may not be as good as you, and some may not be as motivated as you. So strong, but you can't live without him, you have to cooperate with them.

Work is often done in compromises and games, which is the essence of "Harmony."

So. , Song Yunhui began to change, learned to compromise and turn around, and slowly won everyone's support.

When a person reaches middle age, he will let go of his unrealistic arrogance and reckless impulse, and the road of life will become wider and wider.

However, being like the light and the dust does not mean that you are greedy for profit and opportunistic.

Instead, he is mature and calm when faced with problems, round on the outside and square on the inside, clearly knowing what to do and what not to do, knowing how to advance and retreat, and knowing gains and losses.

If you are blinded by desire and only see temptation but not the benefits, you may one day fall into a trap.

Some time ago, six well-known anchors of Dragon TV were collectively banned for attending the birthday party of a "bad rich man", and they learned a painful lesson.

I have read a sentence, a clear mind is more important than a smart mind.

In life, only by always alerting yourself and doing things with your eyes open can you avoid detours.

Opportunistic people may go faster temporarily, but people with a clear head will go further.

2

Being confused is wisdom

In real life, we often meet people who like to be more serious.

Everything has to be competed and understood, and as a result, one is exhausted physically and mentally.

As I get older, I realize that the more sober I live, the less happy I tend to be.

Many times, happiness is hidden in the word "confused".

This kind of confusion is not stupid, but clumsy. It is not stupid, but a kind of tolerance and cultivation.

There is a story told in the novel "Mr. Know-It-All" by the British writer Somerset Maugham:

On the passenger ship from San Francisco to Yokohama, the British man Kelanda, known as the "Jack of All Trades", I met Mr. and Mrs. Ramsay, the staff of the embassy.

During the chat, Kelanda discovered that Ramsay’s wife’s pearl necklace was very valuable.

But Ramsay laughed at him and said that the necklace was bought by his wife before she left New York and cost only $18.

Kelanda, who was familiar with pearls, became angry and insisted that the necklace could be sold for up to 30,000 US dollars.

So the two made a bet of $100.

Kelanda took the necklace and looked at it carefully with a magnifying glass, with a confident and proud smile on her face.

When he was about to speak, he suddenly saw Mrs. Ramsay's face turned pale, as if she would faint soon. She looked at Kelanda with desperate pleading in her eyes.

Kelanda suddenly realized something, calmed down and said: "This is a very good imitation, and the price of eighteen dollars for this kind of defective product is just right."

Amidst everyone's laughter, Kelanda gave Ramsay $100.

He pretended to be confused and lost the bet, but he maintained the dignity of the wife and the peace of the family.

I am reminded of a sentence I read, no one is really stupid. If you think the other person is stupid, it is probably because he is too lazy to argue with you.

There is a popular question and answer on Zhihu: Why do smart people like to pretend to be stupid?

One of the answers is impressive:

"Everyone can act smart, but it is difficult to pretend to be stupid. This requires the wisdom and grace to pretend to be stupid, to be both stupid and stupid. You can afford to be stupid. ”

Many times, being confused is a kind of kindness that shows consideration for others, and it is also a way to protect yourself.

If you are a little confused about financial interests, you will have a clear conscience. If you are a little confused in marriage and family, you will be happier for a longer time. If you are a little confused about career and economics, you will be free and easy.

It is a kind of wisdom to see through without telling the truth, to see through without exposing it; to forget what should be forgotten, and to turn over what should be reprinted.

Ji Xianlin once said: "In life, sometimes you need to be smart, but you can't be less confused."

Life is really hard, and an extra amount of confusion is an extra three points to life. sweet.

3

A person’s greatest wisdom is,

To do things soberly, to be a confused person

In life, being sober is the way to do things, being confused is the way to do things. It is the foundation of being a human being.

Only by working soberly can we maintain a clear direction, steady steps and avoid detours.

Only when you look at people confused can you be more tolerant and understanding, and live a transparent and comfortable life.

Zeng Guofan's officialdom had been ups and downs for decades, and he was known as "the most perfect man in the ages".

In fact, when Zeng Guofan first became an official, he was very serious and often broke up with his friends on bad terms.

Once, when his father passed his birthday, a large group of friends came to congratulate him.

Unexpectedly, at the banquet, Zeng Guofan actually quarreled with a friend, so that he "sweared and was angry and ignored."

Afterwards, Zeng Guofan reflected in his diary I am determined to correct myself.

From then on, I pursued a sober approach to work and a confused life.

Don’t be confused about big things and don’t care about small things.

As a disciple of Zeng Guofan, Zuo Zongtang received much support and help from Zeng Guofan throughout his life.

However, he had an unruly personality and often spoke ill of Zeng Guofan behind his back.

Some people really couldn't stand it, so they told Zeng Guofan. Zeng Guofan always laughed it off and didn't care about it.

When Zuo Zongtang suppressed the Nian Army, it was difficult to raise wages.

After Zeng Guofan learned about it, he tried his best to defy all opinions and did not owe Zuo Zongtang any military pay.

Later, after Zeng Guofan passed away, Zuo Zongtang showed great concern for his descendants.

Zeng Guofan once said in a letter to his friend Hu Linyi: "Only forgetfulness can eliminate all opportunities, only ignorance can dispel ominousness."

Perhaps it is this kind of understanding. The open-mindedness of pretending to be ignorant eliminated the bad luck and accumulated blessings for himself and his descendants.

4

I read a sentence that true maturity means having pursuits in life, having a bottom line in life, and knowing how to make choices.

When a person reaches middle age, he should be half awake to do things and half confused to treat others. This is not only a life attitude, but also a kind of survival wisdom.

Chen Guo, a professor at Fudan University, once said:

"Sobriety and confusion are not contradictory. You must have a clear mind and a generous mind. The combination of the two , can you better express yourself. ”

Only by knowing life clearly and seeing the direction can we get through the chaos of the world and reach the spring of our own life.

For the rest of our lives, may we all live transparently and comfortably.