01.

Weak people always like to hug together for warmth, while strong people naturally like to walk alone.

Sometimes, others are unsociable just because they disdain to be with them. When a person has higher pursuits, he will appear out of place in the crowd. Eagles will not be with weak chickens. Some People are suitable for fighting alone.

Lin Yutang wrote in "The Wind and Cranes": "If you don't fight, there will be a big fight; if you don't fight, the world will not fight with you."

When a person lives a clear and clear life, When you don't ask for things that don't belong to you, and don't fight for things that are meaningless, your life will enter another realm.

Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu are unsociable people. They do not fight for fame or gain. They only work hard in the fields they are good at, but they live a life that everyone envies. appearance.

At that time, everyone was not very optimistic about women, thinking that women could not do much academic work, but Mr. Yang Jiang was different. Not only did she get admitted to Tsinghua University, she continued to study after graduation. Eventually we will become a generation of people.

Her "We Three" uses extremely life-like language to tell an ordinary story about "life is not just about chicken feathers, but also delicious shrimps".

In books, you can see true love.

They also had a lot of suffering in their lives, but in Mr. Yang Jiang’s writings, time was not heavy at all.

Probably because they have never forced themselves to be gregarious or cater to anyone, but only live their own little lives, so time will appear particularly gentle.

02.

Being gregarious actually means you are ordinary, because everyone thinks the same and has the same view on problems. Only in this way can we be unified. Once different views appear among this group of people, they will be treated as aliens.

But real life requires such different views and different voices to improve our society step by step.

Mr. Yang Jiang has experienced China's dark times. At that time, many literati chose to go abroad to seek refuge, but only Yang Jiang and his wife chose to stay when China was in the most critical moment and devoted themselves to China's rise. Strength, this kind of courage is our role model. The current prosperous New China cannot be achieved without the selfless dedication of our predecessors.

People should maintain their own independent thoughts and should not follow the crowd because they are afraid of not fitting in. Sometimes the truth is in the hands of a few people.

Just like Zhao Gao called a deer a horse. He forced the people in the court to stand in line and said in front of the emperor that the deer was a horse. Although everyone knew it was a deer, they still praised it as a good horse. This kind of so-called Being so gregarious is actually confusing right and wrong.

03.

Everyone knows that people’s words can be scary, but they are able to stick to their own ideas in this environment and do not go with the world. Such people are great and choose to be gregarious. is easy, but taking a different path is fraught with difficulty.

If you are not gregarious, you must learn to tolerate isolation and enjoy the happiness of the spiritual world in your own life.

As the saying goes, summer insects cannot talk about ice. There is no need for people from two worlds to talk to each other.

Even if you lower your stature in order to cater to others, such gregariousness cannot bring you happiness, and such gregariousness cannot actually make you a better person.

Even if people around you say that it is virtuous for a woman to have no talent, many of her friends have indeed lived a life of raising husbands and raising children for a long time, but are you willing to live like this?

Every day you live around the kitchen with your children. Is that really the life you want?

It is better to choose not to be gregarious. If you like reading, stick to your hobbies. The world in books is broad. If you stick to it, you will find that you are getting better and better, and people will follow. Reach a new level.

04.

There are many modern people who are urged to get married. They are arranged by their families to go on a blind date just after graduation. It is too late to start their own careers and realize their ideals and ambitions.

The blind date is not the person you like, so you get married hastily, but you become a role model in the eyes of everyone. Because you are married, you can get married after graduation and become a gregarious one, as if you have arrived. If you are not married at your age, you will be out of tune with the crowd, so don’t be so gregarious.

Marriage should be with the person you love, rather than hastily entrusting your life to someone who is not suitable to deal with your parents, which will eventually end in divorce.

You must stick to your inner principles. The rest of your life is very long, and you have to be with the person you love to stay together for a lifetime.

The same is true for the encounter between Mr. Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu. Before meeting Qian Zhongshu, Mr. Yang Jiang had never thought about getting married, and before Mr. Qian Zhongshu met Mr. Yang Jiang, I never thought about marriage.

If you meet your beloved, you should start a family first and then start a career. There is no contradiction between starting a family and starting a career. As long as it is the person you like, it doesn't matter no matter how late you meet.

It is precisely because of the "unsociability" of Mr. Yang Jiang and Mr. Qian Zhongshu that there are more topics between them.

05.

Everyone in the world loves money, but a gentleman loves money in a proper way, and the husband and wife have the same attitude towards this matter.

So, while the outstanding Mr. Qian Zhongshu was studying abroad, he encountered many temptations of money, but he rejected them all and maintained a gentlemanly relationship with others.

Even if life is difficult, he will never give up for five buckets of rice. Others may look a bit "pedantic", but the backbone of China is held up by literati like Mr. Qian Zhongshu.

As for Mr. Yang Jiang, she supported him unreservedly and trusted him. She disdained to associate with others and was willing to wash away all her glory and become a "servant under the stove" for Mr. Qian Zhongshu.

Life belongs to two people and has nothing to do with others. Whether two people are living well or not, you can just know it yourself and there is no need to seek approval from others.

They are true soul mates, the people who understand each other best. They don’t cater to others, don’t smile at people they don’t like, and just live their own quiet little lives.

This free and easy, this calmness is enviable.

As Mr. Yang Jiang once said: "I don't argue with anyone, and I don't care to argue with anyone."

You have probably seen through life and have your own unique understanding of life before you can say such free and unrestrained words.

As long as you are with the one you love, nothing else matters.

06.

At the end of "The Three of Us", they were separated. Mr. Yang Jiang wrote: "I am alone and miss the three of us."

The person who understands her best and tolerates her the most in the world is gone. Maybe no one can understand her incompatibility anymore, but so what?

As long as there is one person who has walked into her heart, pointed out her indifference, understood her unsociability, and tolerated her little temper, this is enough.

People's choices will always be interfered by the outside world. If you have other ideas, you will be said to be unsociable, but if you always do things according to inertial thinking, it will be difficult to make a big breakthrough.

So if you want to start a business or become an outstanding person, you will inevitably be regarded as a person who does not fit in with others.

All "unsociable" people are controversial, just like Mr. Qian Zhongshu insisted on staying.

It is precisely because of his persistence and his unsociability that "Fortress Besieged" came out.

Being "unsociable" is to be able to be your true self. Being gregarious will only cause noisy voices to disturb your true nature. From today on, be a "unsociable" person.