1. Money is not the problem, the problem is lack of money!

2. I won’t accept anyone when I’m drunk, so I’ll hold on to the wall!

3. I’m like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future but looking for No way out.

4. Senior brother, do you know? The second brother’s meat is now more expensive than the master’s.

5. If eating more fish can replenish the brain and make people smarter, then you must eat at least a pair of whales...

6. If the water is clear, there will be no fish; if the people are humble, they will be invincible.

7. Youth is like toilet paper. It looks like there is a lot of it, but when you use it, it is not enough.

8. Pregnancy is like pregnancy. It takes a long time for people to notice it.

9. Friends around me, please hurry up and become famous, so that my memoirs can sell well

10. When a colleague goes to meet a client, he may be nervous and starts talking It was: "Hello, Mr. Liu, what's your last name?" Sweat

11. A female classmate was too dark, and her boyfriend was too fair. One day in the dormitory, the venomous diva suddenly said something to her. A sudden sentence came out:

"You can't do this, you will give birth to zebras"

12. I have always regarded handsome men and money as dirt, and they have always regarded me this way.

13. Don’t compare yourself to me, I am too lazy to compare with you

14. I am not a casual person, I am not a human being when I am casual

15. God Said, there must be light, I said I opposed, and from then on there was darkness in the world

16. I am in a bad mood today. I only have four things to say. Including this sentence and the previous two sentences. My words That’s it

17. To be a human being, you have to be a person who hovers between cow A and cow C

18. My big name is God, my nickname is Jesus, and my English name is God. The name of the Dharma is Tathagata...

19. You cannot hang yourself on a tree. You have to try to hang yourself on several nearby trees.

20. The tree does not need bark. , will undoubtedly die; if a person is shameless, he will be invincible in the world.

21. The farmer’s three punches hurt a little

22. In fact, I have always been very popular: when I was a child, everyone loved me, but now I am loved by bitches

23. Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs

24. Go your own way and let others take a taxi (Go other people’s way and let others get desperate)

25. Rats carry knives and look for cats in the streets

26. As long as you work hard and poop seriously

27. Who is the fastest among Chinese people? It's Cao Cao (not Liu Xiang). Because Cao Cao and Cao Cao are here

28. Get away as far as your thoughts go

29. Only when you stand in a long queue at the train station can you truly realize that you are "Descendants of the Dragon". < /p>

32. Lie down wherever you fall

33. If the tiger doesn’t show its power, you think I am HELLO KITTY!

34. Don’t think too hard~

36. Lost...

37. No money, no power, I won’t treat you better. , can you follow me?

38. Take a newspaper to the toilet, I am a scholar.

39. Go to Google and Baidu.

40 Women, be kind to yourself.

41. Your ugliness has nothing to do with your face...

42. Grandfathers are all descendants...

43. God, Have you let summer and winter live together? ! What a hell of a weather!

44. Big birds can be found in any forest!

45. Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs.

46. Summer is just not good. When I was poor, I didn’t even have to drink the northwest wind...

47. Do whatever you want!

48. Pregnancy is like pregnancy, it takes a long time for people to see it.

49. Don’t come to me if you have nothing to do, and don’t come to me if something happens.

50. Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes.

51. The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly...

52. I want to fall in love early, but it is too late...

54. Get away from me as far as your thoughts go!

55. It’s been a long time since anyone has made cowhide look so fresh and refined!

56. Boss, is money really that important to you? I talked for more than three hours and didn’t get a penny drop?

57. When I woke up, it was dark.

58. If I became the HR manager, the first thing I would do would be to promote myself to the position of boss.

59. I spend all my time losing weight except eating, and you still say I don’t have perseverance?

60. Water can carry a boat and cook porridge.

61. Buying a computer but not having broadband is like having all the food and wine prepared but becoming a monk before eating.

62. There is a very old legend - those who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever

63. Life is easy; easy.

64. I won’t tell you even if I beat you to death.

65. Problems that money can solve are not problems.

66. After studying for more than ten years, I think it is easier to get along in kindergarten!

67. You even believe the advertisements. Are you stupid by reading?

68. How can you lose weight if you don’t eat enough?

69. Sleep is an art - no one can stop me from pursuing art.

70. The early bird catches the worm, and the early bird catches the worm.

71. Oh my God, my clothes have lost weight again!

72. My name on my girlfriend’s mobile phone is “him”. After we broke up, I became “it”.

73. I am different from you because I am human.

74. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel

75. I only drink pure water and pure milk, so I am very simple< /p>

76 God gave us youth and acne at the same time.

77 When problems arise, first look for the cause within yourself. Don’t blame the earth’s lack of gravity for constipation.

78 Although I am not very handsome, when I was a child, some people praised my left nostril for being idol-like.

79 Mom’s advice: Girl, you must eat appropriately to lose weight!

80 Spring is the season when colds and emotions are most common. Some people accidentally catch a cold, while others accidentally fall in love. I belong to the former.

81 I was also an infatuated person back then, but it rained~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ and I drowned.

82 Money is not everything, sometimes a credit card is needed.

83 I allow you to enter my world, but I will never allow you to walk around in it.

84 I hope that one day I can double-click my wallet with the mouse, then select a hundred-dollar bill and press "CTRL+C". Then "CTRL+V" continuously.

85 I am a lonely tree, standing by the roadside for thousands of years, waiting lonely, just for you to pass by me one day

I fall in love with you when I walk by. If I can’t smash you, I’ll count you down. Live in vain.

86 If you love me, please raise your hands; if you don’t love me, please stand on your head.

87 People are afraid of being famous and pigs are afraid of being strong, men are afraid of being poor and women are afraid of being fat.

88 If being rich is also a mistake, I would rather make the same mistake again and again.

89 If marriage is the tomb of love, then I hope someone will bury me.

90 Never hang yourself from a tree. You can try it several times on the surrounding trees.

91 Don’t set the bank card password to your girlfriend’s birthday, otherwise it will be a lot of trouble to change it.

92 The happiest thing: sleeping until you wake up naturally. Counting money makes my hands cramp. The saddest thing: sleeping until my hands cramp, counting money until I wake up naturally. 93 Money can buy a house but not a home, it can buy a marriage but not love, it can buy a clock but not time

Money is not everything, but the source of pain. Give me your money and let me bear the pain alone!

94 Boys must be poor, otherwise they will not know how to struggle. Girls must be rich, otherwise they will coax them away with a piece of cake.

95 A man pretends to be dead to be a confidant, and a woman undergoes plastic surgery to please a man.

96 Fate is responsible for shuffling the cards, but it is ourselves who play the cards!

97 When we were young, we often made faces in the mirror. When we are old, the mirror is even.

98 When I give birth to a son in the future, I want to name him "So Handsome." Then when people see me, they will say, "What a handsome dad."

99 Loving someone is a helpless thing. Love is a gesture, waiting for love is a kind of expectation, and lovelessness is a kind of ability.

100 The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets, and the beauty of a man lies in telling lies in the daytime.

101 When will the bright moon come? Ask your roommate for a drink. Does the handsome guy next door have a girlfriend?

102 Even if you are good at martial arts, you are also afraid of kitchen knives.

103 Everyone has at least one. A dream has a reason to be strong.

104 Mature people don’t ask about the past, smart people don’t ask about the present, and open-minded people don’t ask about the future.

105 Love is like two. The person who is holding on to the rubber band is always the one who is unwilling to let go!

106 If the heart has no place to rest, it will wander wherever it goes!

107 The brain! It is the most noble organ - because it is the brain that tells you.

108 Cherish life - God must have His arrangements for you to live.

109 Work, quit. One step leads to a brighter future for love, but one step back leads to empty space.

110 We had a little disagreement: she wanted me to treat gold like dirt, and I wanted her to regard gold as dirt.

111 The highest state of work is to watch others go to work and receive other people’s wages