I accidentally came across this introductory psychology book on World Book Day. After reading it in one sitting, I was really moved and felt healed in my heart!

This is a national-level psychological counseling introductory book that has been best-selling in the UK for more than 20 years. The author uses his years of psychological counseling experience to describe a standard template for psychological counseling treatment.

The protagonist of this book, Mr. Toad, the author borrowed the protagonists from the classic fairy tale "The Wind in the Willows" and let them appear on the stage again.

Mr. Toad went through 10 psychological consultations in one ***, from a state of depression to a final surge of heart and strength.

Those who were shocked

1. Children are divided into two states. One is natural children. They face the world normally and have the basic emotions of children (happiness). and affection, anger, sadness, fear, etc.), normal emotional release is conducive to a sound personality in adulthood; the other is an adaptive child who has to hide the child's emotions early due to the moodiness and elusiveness of the caregiver or the environment. Normal emotions.

2 A person’s growth experiences three states: child ego state, parent ego state, and adult ego state. In a successful life, these three states are necessary. They influence each other and achieve each other.

3 In our relationship with others, it can be summarized as four life coordinates,

A I am good, you are not good

B I am not good , hello

C I’m okay, you’re okay

D I’m not okay, you’re not okay either

4 The key to everything is to prepare yourself for What kind of "life coordinates" have been set. Once we decide which attitudes and perspectives we will adopt in childhood, we stick with our choices throughout the rest of our lives. These attitudes and opinions become the underlying structure of our existence, and we turn our lives into a "self-fulfilling prophecy"

5 Whenever our emotions are truly understood, we can have Opportunities for growth. This is truly learning by doing. This is how we learn anything important from birth.

6 A person with high emotional intelligence can identify the feelings of others. This skill is called "emotion". He can build good relationships with others by understanding and responding to the other person's emotions.

This book is very short, only about 100,000 words. It seemed that it only took me an afternoon from opening the book to finishing reading. The story is so exciting and worth pondering.

Many of the ideas in this book are similar to Adler's "Inferiority and Transcendence", and I felt very emotional after reading it. It turns out that the original family environment really has a great impact on us, and our inadvertent emotions during the parenting process leave irreparable marks on our children.

When people reach their thirties, they begin to let go of their obsessions and think about themselves and the past. At this stage, it’s time to cultivate yourself. What are your thoughts on psychology and its impact on life? Welcome to discuss~