Originally, I was very insecure. Seeing your problem, I think I can be a Muslim teacher for you. As for what the sage said, the question of being a good teacher was put aside for the time being. My advice to you is: quit your job and go to a big city.
As you said yourself, you have no political ambitions, and you don't want to be a leader, climb up, or die. Such ambivalence can only explain one problem: the work within the system is not suitable for you.
There is a famous saying that soldiers who don't want to be generals are not good soldiers. This famous saying embodies a person's love and fighting spirit. Because I love my military status, I hope I can become a leader among soldiers. Because he was full of fighting spirit to become a general, he showed his love.
According to this famous saying, it's easy to find that you don't love the job of civil servants, so you don't want to grow up in the civil service, and you don't want to be the best among civil servants. Because you don't love, there will be no passion for doing things, and there will be a feeling of eating and waiting for death.
And the feeling of eating and waiting for death makes you extremely anxious. You really want to get rid of this state. You don't want your life to be like this. You really hope that you can get continuous promotion. You really hope that your income can also increase through the improvement of your ability.
You see, the reason why you are in this state today is because you don't love or even hate the job of civil servant, so you want to do some sideline work. I come from the countryside. When I was a child, I fed pigs and herded cattle at home. My elders often use pigs, cows and dogs to teach me some life truths. One of them is: cows press their heads if they don't drink water. Your current state is cattle, and the job of civil servants is water. You were forced to be a civil servant by your family. The best way to solve this situation is to try to raise your head and think carefully about whether you are really thirsty. If you really don't need this bucket of water from civil servants, quit your job and go to a big city.
Although life in big cities is very stressful, there are also many growth opportunities you need. When you arrive in a big city, facing the pressure of life, if you are a brave person, you will turn the pressure into motivation and grow rapidly.
Please believe me, you are still young, and you are only 28 years old. At present, in such a backward place as Heilongjiang, the average life expectancy is 75 years. In other words, even if you live in a backward place like Heilongjiang, as long as there is no accident, it is a high probability to live to 75 years old. Think about it, you are only 28 years old now, and you will be 75 years old in almost 50 years, which is enough for you to make a difference in a big city.
So, my advice to you is to quit your job and go to a big city to find your dream. Otherwise, you will eat and die every day for the next 50 years. What a boring thing it will be and what a wonderful time it will be.