Some people in modern society, whether parents or other adults, always use the filial piety of Confucius and Mencius to scare people.

There is no shortage of "foolish filial piety" in daily life. The essence of foolish filial piety is brainwashing. For example, foolish filial piety is a great harm to marriage. Many foolish filial piety people (such as Ma Baonan) cause unhappy marriages and increase the divorce rate. For another example, when dealing with people in society, you are always hesitant and uncertain when faced with decisions, and always seem to want to wait for other people's suggestions and reminders. This is also immaturity caused by foolish filial piety. Also, the most difficult thing to repay in our society is the emotional debt. "It's not easy for me to give birth to you", "It's not easy for me to raise you", "I thought I couldn't move you anymore because of you", but there is no clear explanation. Relatives also need a certain distance and boundary, and some even blindly ask for it.

Do these people really understand what filial piety is? Do you really understand what Confucianism calls filial piety? Maybe it’s half-assed and based on hearsay.

Confucianism advocates filial piety, especially Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty who only respected Confucianism. Ruling the world with filial piety became an idea of ??governing the country. Filial piety is also a traditional Chinese virtue. Confucius said: "Filial piety is the foundation of virtue", which means that the essence of filial piety is benevolence. To be divorced from the essence of benevolence is to misinterpret filial piety. Mencius believed that telling your parents about your thoughts and situations without concealing them, practicing self-love and cultivating benevolence, and serving as an example for future generations.

Confucius and Mencius advocated "loyalty and filial piety", but did not advocate the idea of ??"foolish loyalty, foolish filial piety". First of all, "Confucius' Family Collection, Six Books" believes that in order to escape the wrath of his elders, a truly filial son should learn from Shun's behavior and not be like Zeng Shen - no matter whether his father asked him to work or beat him unconscious, Zeng Shen would not run away. Just stand there and let him be beaten. Secondly, "Mencius Li Lou Shang" explains that the relationship between king and minister is a reciprocal relationship, and also says that an unruly king should be punished or replaced.

Judging from the above-mentioned famous sayings of Confucianism, obedience and blind obedience are not loyal and filial people. Obedience depends on the circumstances and the purpose.

Blindly listening to the words of parents and elders is possible if it is legal, reasonable and ethical, but there are two points that require special attention: first, whether the parents and elders have enough knowledge and experience to make it reasonable and well-founded Convince you; secondly, whether their conclusions or suggestions are subjective, don’t question them if they are not objective after hearing them.

People who always obey their parents' arrangements will not be successful. They must be independent in life. Don't always think that filial piety means listening to what they say without talking back and resisting. When they all go to the Paradise and you are the only one left, you will understand the importance of thinking and doing.

However, it was too late by then.