Gift to Wang Lun (revised version)

Published by: Laughter 2007-12-07

Li Baichengzhou went to shit,

Suddenly I remembered that I didn’t bring any paper.

The water of Peach Blossom Pond is three thousand feet,

It is not as good as the paper Wang Lun gave me.

What diseases do Chinese people suffer from

■Zhuge Liang

Cause: Rheumatoid Arthritis

Symptoms: Sitting in a wheelchair for a long time

p>

■Guan Yu

Cause: excessive capillaries in subcutaneous tissue

Symptoms: red face

■Zhang Fei

Cause : Eyelid muscle disorder

Symptoms: Not closing eyes while sleeping

■Wei Yan

Cause: Postcranial bone hyperplasia

Symptoms: multiple "reverse bones"

■Mi Heng

Cause: congenital mania plus excess fat (also: Xu Chuyi also has this disease)

Symptoms : Afraid of heat, likes to be naked

■Xiahou Dun

Cause: Blindness (accident)

Symptoms: One-eyed

■Sima Yi

Cause: excessive protein in the whites of the eyes, farsightedness (presbyopia)

Symptoms: eagle looking like a wolf

■Jiang Wei

Cause: gall bladder disease Big, gallbladder desmoplasia

Symptoms: Bold as a hammer

■Yang Xiu

Cause: Too long tongue, lingual smooth muscle disorder (referred to as "Long tongue")

Symptoms: Unable to control one's mouth

■Zhou Yu

Cause: Congenital narrow chest, insufficient lung capacity

Symptoms : Low vital capacity (referred to as "stingy")

■Sun Quan

Cause: hair melanin variation

Symptoms: purple beard

■Cao Cao

Cause: epilepsy, stroke, hysteria, etc.

Symptoms: many, such as headache, avoidance of medical treatment,

talking nonsense, and in severe cases, killing people in dreams.

■Liu Bei

Cause: Developmental disorder of limb skeleton

Symptoms: ears catching wind, hands longer than knees, patella hyperplasia, etc.

■Sima Shi

Cause: Eye cancer

Symptoms: Eye tumors

■Dong Zhuo

Cause: excessive obesity, blood fat Too much,

Cholesterol excess

Symptoms: Light a lamp on the navel and it will not go out for three days.

■Deng Ai

Cause: Stuttering

Symptoms: Ai Ai Ai Ai Ai...

■Lu Bu

Cause: Narcolepsy

Symptoms: Falling asleep at the most critical moment.

■Lu Meng

Cause: unknown (yet to be dissected)

Symptoms: mysterious death

■Zhang Bao

Cause: Incessant internal bleeding (accident, horse lost its front hoof and fell down a mountain stream)

Symptoms: fractures, internal organ damage.

■Shao Di

Cause: drug poisoning

Symptoms: highly confidential

Four classics in one sentence

Red Mansion: This troubled stone

Three Kingdoms: This group of resourceful and helpless people who were in chaos

Water Margin: The Unbearable Armor in Life

Journey to the West: Turning bustle into eternal silence

Red Mansion: The red building is just opposite the green lantern, the image is beautiful

Three Kingdoms: The rolling Yangtze River flows eastward, fishermen and woodcutter Happy reunion

Water Margin: Heroes shed tears

Journey to the West: It’s so late, where are you going?

Red Mansions: Dream of Red Mansions Me I feel that the lives of teenagers aged 14 or 15 are very empty. You can blame the society, blame the society

Three Kingdoms: I only have sporadic memories, I like Zhou Yu inside

Water Margin: Very annoying, the bad guys are always old Is to let Song Jiang go

Journey to the West: Journey to the West is beautiful, and Journey to the West is the youngest rogue

Red Mansion: The heart is as high as the sky, and the life is as thin as the paper

Three Kingdoms : The Rolling Yangtze River Passes East

Water Margin: Young people don’t read

Journey to the West: Five hundred years have passed, I ask the common people, you ask the ghosts and gods

Red Mansion: Shut up

Water Margin: The Power of Humanity and the Power of Indifference to Humanity

Three Kingdoms: The most suitable masterpiece for fill-in-the-blank questions

Journey to the West: The gimmick attracts me more than the story

p>

The Red Mansion: There is a fly in the ointment, but now we believe, and the beautiful family is wasted in vain

Three Kingdoms: Right and wrong, success or failure is empty

Water Margin: Hot blood is dry, hot tears are dry, enthusiasm is empty

p>

Journey to the West: I remember when I was young, you loved chatting and I loved laughing; when I was tired and threw books away for a long time, I woke up and realized that my dream had become empty

Dream of Red Mansions:

Just Like a finely knitted sweater, the words are all there and clearly visible, but you still can't see the hidden stitches behind it. Even if you learn these stitches, whether you have the physical strength to knit an equally beautiful sweater is another important question.

Three Kingdoms:

Every reader participates in the construction of his own "Three Kingdoms" with his own life, between the fiction and reality of history.

Water Margin:

The joy of rivers and lakes actually does not make people happy at all. People are here, desires are there, and you can't escape all kinds of human nature even if you are far away from the rivers and lakes.

Journey to the West:

A major breakthrough in imagination. But what follows is a wholesale copying of tired stories. Much like today's serial soap comedies.

Red Mansion: Emotion is the greatest tragedy in life

Three Kingdoms: If a man wants to survive, he must be wise

Water Margin: Power harms people, and the system harms people

p>

Journey to the West: Ancient Rhapsody

Red Mansion: Classical mood, boring now

Three Kingdoms: Can't use it once a year

Water Margin: Peasant Uprising , it will never come true

Journey to the West: I like Westward Journey

Red Mansions: The love between children in the Grand View Garden

Three Kingdoms: Wei, Shu and Wu unified the world

Water Margin: Liangshan Po Hero Grass Bandits

Journey to the West: Assimilation in front of the Buddha in Leiyin Temple

Red Mansion: Too Much Trouble

Three Kingdoms: Too Much Trouble

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Water Margin: The annoyance is overwhelming

Journey to the West: The annoyance is overwhelming

The Red Mansion: Strength is humiliating, but deep love will not last long

Three Kingdoms:… …

Water Margin: Down

Journey to the West:…

Red Mansion:…

Three Kingdoms:…

Water Margin: I like to watch the heroes drink and eat meat the most

Journey to the West:...

The Red Mansion: One person achieves enlightenment, chickens and dogs ascend to heaven, and one person loses power...

Three Kingdoms: Heroes emerge from troubled times

Water Margin: The evil nature of the Chinese people causes trouble

Journey to the West: Pure nonsense, a model textbook for the policy of obscuring the people

The Red Mansion: Thousands of reds cry, and thousands of beauties share the same sorrow

Three Kingdoms: There is no hero in the world, so he became a strong man

Water Margin: If you rebel, fight to the end. Don’t think while rioting. To change my mind

Journey to the West: Monkey King is my ancestor and my idol, a symbol of freedom and strength

Red Mansion: I haven’t seen it, but I admire it very much

Three Kingdoms: A long-lasting read, I always pick it up

Water Margin: A classic, just some short stories

Journey to the West: A romantic journey, I once longed for it

The Red Mansion: One of the few good novels in China, apart from The Golden Ping Mei, is the Red Mansion

Three Kingdoms: This is just a fake story, among the novels I like the Chronicles of the Eastern Zhou Dynasty the most

Water Margin : You must watch Jin Shengtan's "tampering", then it will be interesting

Journey to the West: It is not very interesting, but the humorous part is worth noting

The Red Mansion: Melancholy and old joy are like dreams

p>

Three Kingdoms: One General's Success

Water Margin: Life is Like an Illusion

Journey to the West: The Weak and the Strong

The Red Mansion: Stubbornness is Sensable

Three Kingdoms: A Warm and Cool World

Water Margin: Conversion of Righteousness to Rites

Journey to the West: Ruthlessness is Compassion

Red Mansion: Everyone in a Flower Garden The phenomenon and rules of the decline of flowers and plants

Three Kingdoms: Description of Animal Competition for Food

Water Margin: The Distance between Ideal and Reality

Journey to the West: The Character of Humanity in Strange Divine Powers Promote or destroy

The Red Mansion: The most bourgeois book, yet despised by the petty bourgeoisie

Three Kingdoms: Sun Tzu's Art of War Senior Generals' Practical Exercises

Water Margin: II A picture of the work and life of a third-rate general

Journey to the West: It has the same "educational" significance as the other three books

The Red Mansion: Things are impermanent

Three Kingdoms: The Winner The loser of the prince is the thief. The Three Kingdoms taught me that there is no right or wrong, and everything is won by force

Water Margin: I don’t like it at all. I think it is just killing people. I suspect that the author himself is cynical and concocted this kind of thing. A Water Margin

Journey to the West: No Feeling

The Red Mansion: The Emotional Life of a Big Family

Three Kingdoms: If we unite for a long time, we must divide, and if we divide for a long time, we must unite

Water Margin: Peasant uprisings should not end with being recruited, and they can be free even in the wild

Far away

Journey to the West: Conquering demons is the nature of the Buddha

Red Mansion: Thousands of threads are confusing but the results are gone

Three Kingdoms: The red-faced hate the white-faced It's a bit cute

Water Margin: reasonable but not very interesting

Journey to the West: I don't like it

Red Mansion: Can't tell

Three Kingdoms: Fighting (Cold Weapon Age) is an interesting thing

Water Margin: The characters are so damn good, I just want to watch it in one sitting

Journey to the West: I really watched it No more

The Red Mansion: Even the best Chinese textbooks will be outdated

Three Kingdoms: It formed almost half of my impressions of ancient China before I was ten years old

Water Margin: I Not interested in boys fighting

Journey to the West: I like it (omit five tildes here)

The Red Mansion: a book suitable for those who are twenty years old

Three Kingdoms : Yang Shen's "Linjiang Immortal" can be summarized

Water Margin:...

Journey to the West:...

Red Mansion: I guessed the beginning of the story, but not the ending

Three Kingdoms: Why did Guan, Zhang, Zhao, and Zhuge become so greedy for such a master? ——"When you go out to hang out, which boss you follow is very important! If you are stupid and strong like me, you are with the right person!"

Water Margin: What a mess! ——If you run away, you will have to pay it back sooner or later.

Journey to the West: Don’t tell me that Journey to the West is anti-authority and anti-hegemony. I don’t believe it. He is a fairy tale, the story my mother told me every day before I went to bed when I was seven years old!

Red Mansions: After seeing Red Mansions, I gave up my desire to write anything (Existentialism through the Looking Glass)

Journey to the West: Things always change people, people cannot change things (Evolution)

Water Margin: I’m sorry I haven’t watched it

Three Kingdoms: I’m sorry I haven’t watched it

Three Kingdoms: I love Zhao Zilong

Water Margin: I Love Master Li

Journey to the West: I love Zhu Bajie

A Dream of Red Mansions: I love Lin Daiyu

Red Mansions: When you come out to hang out, you always have to pay back

Three Kingdoms: The only thing we have is worry

Water Margin: The underworld is actually a promising career

Journey to the West: Counter-terrorism is a permanent topic