What is the greatest tragedy of love?

Some people think that the biggest tragedy of love is of course that love breaks up at the end. It is sad and regrettable to break up because there is no emotion, but this is the helplessness of love rather than a tragedy. On the other hand, it is the luck of love.

Being together when you don't love is a tragedy. In fact, the biggest tragedy of love is that you don't even know if you still love each other, and you mistake family for love.

Huang Lei once talked about his views on marriage and love in a live program.

"I am very opposed to the husband and wife become relatives, relatives are relatives, my mother is my relative, my father is my relative, my daughter is my relative, but my wife is my lover, my lover, my lover. She is different! "

"I think we are still lovers, and we should be lovers for life."

Generally speaking, these words mean that love and affection are different in nature, and the beginning and sublimation of love are higher than affection. Affection means that I love my parents, my brothers and sisters and my children. This feeling is stronger and more stable, but love is different. Love is more "change".

For a simple example, just like network cable and network speed, they are irreversible. Love is like the internet speed, active, but sometimes unstable. Family is like a network cable, stable but inactive. Although they are all what we need, they are different in nature, because one is love and the other is affection.

Mistake love as your right hand. Both men and women, as long as they care about and understand each other, love will be more stable. If you already feel that the other person is a part of your "body", just like your own hand, and you are used to it, it's all wet, and the rift between your feelings will get bigger and bigger.

There is another saying about affection.

At the class reunion, several female friends around me were kept as mistresses by men who had been married for 3 or 4 years. I was confused at the time. Crossing the moral bottom line at a young age. Is it because of the money?

They said that the other person loved her very much, and she couldn't bear to part with it. She said that every time I tried to quit, he would coax me, and she relented.

I was even more angry when I heard this, so I asked them, you told him to divorce and stay with you! She was even sadder. She said that the man said he didn't love his wife, but after so many years, it has become a family relationship. How can he be separated from his relatives?

Although I was angry, I found a truth later.

It is "inevitable" that love becomes kinship, which is a law that no one can change. Especially for couples who have been married for many years, food, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea, both sides have understood and become accustomed to each other's living habits. As the days passed, the couple had long lost their freshness and mystery when they were together, thus gradually becoming "relatives".

But this kind of "relative" is not in the true sense, but represents a boring emotional life and a mediocre daily life of husband and wife.

Then why does Huang Lei, who has been married for many years, think that there is only love and no affection between husband and wife?

The root cause of marital unhappiness is nothing more than the following two kinds:

First, marriage has no foundation of love.

Second, I don't know how to operate after marriage.

In fact, everyone understands this truth. The point is that it is not easy to do this. Think about whether you have carefully combed in your spare time, whether you have thought about it, and whether you have really implemented it.

In fact, there is still love between the old couple, but it is covered up by trivial matters of life. This increasingly dull life might as well be carefully excavated, and it still exists around you. Huang Lei thought about love seriously and grasped it just right. In the middle of this year, he had another son, and he was so happy!

Of course, the beginning of all this depends on whether you get a good wife or a good husband.

There is a famous saying recommended to everyone:

Get married anyway. If you get a good wife, you will be happy. If you get a bad wife, you will become a philosopher.

Anyway, get married. If you get a good wife, you will be happy. Marry a bad woman and you will become a philosopher.

When the article was written here, I suddenly realized. ...

One of the husband and wife always has to "walk" in front of the other, and it is the truth to stay together for a lifetime. It is the most important thing to take care of each other, take care of your family and let your children grow up healthily. Does it matter whether a husband and wife are lovers or relatives?

Cherish the present and cherish each other.