Don't ask questions-get along with the Dursleys. This is the first rule (Harry's).
Penny Menstruation often says Dudley looks like an angel-but Harry says he looks like a pig with a wig.
The people he met at work, Harry, the meeting, Harry, the bank, Harry, these are his favorite complaints.
A topic (Uncle Vernon)
Dumbledore: We can only guess that we may never know (in fact, he already knows).
I can entrust my life to him (Hagrid)
Even if there is a way, I will not do it.
Harry: While licking the popsicle, he saw a gorilla scratching its head. This gorilla looks exactly like Dudley, except that its hair is not golden.
In hindsight, he felt that he should know that good things don't last long.
1. Mr. Moon Face greets Professor Snape and asks him not to stick his abnormal big nose into other people's affairs.
Mr. Sharp fork agrees with Mr. Moon Face and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly fool.
Mr. Bigfoot wants to express his surprise that a fool like Snape has become a professor.
Mr wormtail said hello to Professor Snape and suggested that he wash his hair. It was a mass of mud.
2. "This is confidential and we won't know until the Ministry decides to make it public." Percy said seriously, "Mr. Crouch is right not to reveal the secret easily."
Oh, shut up, weatherby. Fred said.
3. lee jordan Gryffindor now leads 80-0. See how Firebolt is exercised! Porter is really playing his speed now. Watch it turn-autumn comet can't compare with it. In this competition of duration, the accurate balance ability of firebolt-"
"Jordan! Did Firebolt pay you to advertise? Continue to comment! "
4. "Well, I dreamed that I was playing Quidditch that night," said Ron, frowning desperately. "What do you think this means?"
"This may mean that you will be eaten by a big piece of fudge," said Harry, leafing through the dream interpretation guide.
5. "Do you know?" When Ron and Hermione entered the auditorium, Harry said to them, "I think we'd better go to Pudmir United to see if oliver wood died unfortunately during training, because his soul seems to be attached to Angelina."
6. George and Fred: "I won't send you a ball of dragon dung like last time, will I?"
Percy blushed: "that ... that's for experiments, not for me!" " "
"Actually, we sent it to him." As he left the table, Ferede whispered to Harry.
As for Professor Snape, it goes without saying that he would rather accept Harry as his adopted son than let his classmates play games in class.
8. The clue of the second project is in the golden egg. Harry opened the golden egg in front of everyone. In an instant, an extremely horrible and shrill scream filled the whole room. Everyone guessed what the second project was after hearing the sound.
"It seems that someone is suffering!" Neville said-he turned pale and spilled sausage all over the floor. "What you have to deal with is the heart-piercing curse!" "
"It's illegal to say stupid things, Neville," said George. "They can't read the terrible curse on soldiers. I think it sounds a bit like Percy singing ... maybe you will attack him in the shower, Harry. "
9. Ron was so angry that a medieval wizard shouted that he obviously had a serious acne.
"What's that?" He asked angrily, and the therapist chased Ron for six frames, pushing the people in the picture aside.
"This is a sinking skin, master, there will be scars, which will make you less attractive than now-"
"You don't say who it is?" Ron's ears are red.
"Just stick toad's liver to your throat, the sun is shining, the moon is shining, and you stand naked in a bucket of eels-"
"I don't have acne!"
"But your face is dazzling, master-"
"That's freckles!" Ron was furious. "Go back to your own box and leave me alone!"
10. "What if I wave my wand and nothing happens?" Harry asked.
"Then throw away the wand, aim it at his nose and give him a good punch." Ron suggested.
1 1. Mrs. Weasley: Oh! You did a good job. Everyone in the family is a prefect! Fred said angrily, what, what are George and I, next-door neighbors?
12. "Well, we usually fail one course." Ron said gloomily as they walked up the marble stairs. He just told him how to tell his examiner that he saw an ugly man with a tumor on his nose in his crystal ball. When he looked up, he realized that it was the reflection of his examiner in the crystal ball, which made Harry feel much better.
13. Ha: "Ron, let's follow the spider."
Luo: "Why spiders! ? Not a butterfly! "
14. Joe: "quaffle was immediately grabbed by Gryffindor's angelina johnson-what an excellent chaser that girl is, she is charming-"
Professor McGonagall: "Jordan!"
Joe: "I'm sorry, professor."
15. Joe: "Thirty to zero! Put up with it, you dirty, deceitful man-"
Michael: Jordan, if you can't make a fair comment-! "
Joe: "I'm just commenting, Professor!" "
Malfoy made Harry lose the Snitch.
"You lying bitch!" Jordan screamed into the microphone and jumped out of Professor McGonagall's reach. "You dirty, lying son of a bitch-"
16. "Mr. Crouch!" Percy was almost out of breath with excitement. He leaned over and bowed, and then he looked like a hunchback. "Would you like a cup of tea?"
"Oh," said Mr. Crouch, looking at Percy with a little surprise. "Well-thank you, weatherby."
Fred and George laughed so hard that they almost sprayed tea into the cup.
17. "Ron, can we borrow this pig?" George asked.
"No, it's out delivering letters." Ron said. "For what?"
"Because George wants to invite it to the dance." Fred said sarcastically.
"Because we have a letter to deliver, you stupid idiot." George said.
18. When the twins left, they pointed to Umbridge and said to Peeves, "Peeves, send her to hell for us." Peeves listened to the students for the first time, took off his hat and bowed.
19. Rita said to Dumbledore:
"I don't know if you have read my article about the summer of the International Federation of Wizards."
"Great," said Dumbledore, his eyes shining. "I especially like reading the paragraph where you described me as a rigid old madman."
Rita Skeeter showed no signs of shame.
20. When Peeves struggled to twist the crystal chandelier, Harry clearly heard Professor McGonagall say to Peeves through his teeth: You should twist it there!
2 1. Hagrid said: I spent most of my life trying to drive the twins out of the forbidden forest.
22. Wood cleared his throat to make everyone quiet.
"All right, boys." He said.
"And the girls." Chaser Angelina Johnson said.
"And the girls." Wood agreed. "It's time."
"This important moment." Fred Weasley said.
"The moment we've been waiting for," said George.
"We have memorized Oliver's speech." Fred said to Harry, "We were on the team last year."
"Shut up, you two." Wood said. "This is Gryffindor's best team for so many years. We will win. I know. "
He glared at everyone as if to say, "This is not enough for you."
23. "Then, on Wednesday, I had a fight and lost," said Ron.
"Ah, I just want to write a battle. Ok, I'll write that I lost the bet. " Harry said.
"Yes, just say you bet that I will win the battle ..." said Ron.
24. "Percy is afraid." George whispered to Harry, "The girl in Ravenclaw is a prefect. Percy probably thought the monster was afraid to attack the team leader. "
25. "You know-(He scolded Snape for what he did to make Hermione cry," Ron! "What can I do for you? Told me to clean up chamber pot in the hospital. There is no magic yet! " He was out of breath with anger and clenched his fist. "Why can't Blake hide in Snape's office, huh? He can finish him for us! " Ron said.
Before the Quidditch World Cup, Ron liked the panoramic telescope. He looked at the crowd across the court excitedly and said, "Great! I can let that old guy dig his nose again ... again ... again ... "
27. Fred and George exchanged glances.
Do you mind if we don't kiss you, Ron? Fred asked, pretending to be afraid.
"We can curtsy if you like," said George.
"Oh, shut up!" Ron said, staring at them angrily.
"Otherwise?" Fred said with a bad smile on his face. "Will we be grounded?"
"I'll see if he dares." George giggled and said.
"If you are not careful, he can!" Hermione said angrily.
Fred and George laughed, and Ron whispered, "Don't say that, Hermione."
"George, we have to be more careful in the future," Fred said, pretending to be trembling all over. "The two men are staring at us ..."
28. "It was our first grade, and we had a little conflict with Filch ..."
"We buried a few dung bombs in the corridor ... which made him very depressed for some reason ..."
"At that time, we were naive and carefree ..."
Harry snorted. He doubted whether they were naive.
29. "Oh, Percy, so you are the prefect! You should have told us earlier, I don't know! "
"Wait, I think, I remember he said, said once-"
"Maybe twice-"
"Wait a minute-"
"I have been talking all summer!"
30. "How was the exam, snot?" Zhan Mu asked.
"I was staring at him and his nose touched the parchment," Sirius said unkindly. "The parchment must be full of large oil stains. They can't read a word clearly."
3 1. Trelawney: "Honey, were you born in winter?"
Harry: "No, my birthday is in July."
I don't think anyone can ride it at present! Hermione screamed.
Harry and Ron looked at her.
"What do you think Harry will do with it-sweep the floor?" Ron said.
33. Welcome! He said, "Welcome to the new school year at Hogwarts! Before the banquet begins, I want to say a few words. That is: idiot! Cry! Residue! Twist! Thank you! "
Percy: Mr. Crouch can speak 200 languages! Mermaids, turkeys and trolls ... "
"Anyone can speak troll language," Fred said disapprovingly. "As long as you point at it and snore."
Even Fred said Ron might make him and George proud. They are seriously considering admitting that they are related to him. He told Ron that they had been trying to deny it for four years.
36. "He seems to be a very good teacher, but I hope I can compete with Bogert-"
"What are you afraid of? The homework is too simple? " Ron said.
37. "Fate told me that your exam in June was related to spheres," said Professor Trelawney.
Hermione said disdainfully, "Seriously ..." Fate has informed her "... Who gave the exam? She! This prediction is really amazing. "
38. Lockhart raised his wand and waved it, trying to create a complex pattern, but accidentally dropped it on the ground. Loha
Kurt quickly picked it up and said, "Oh, my wand is a little overexcited."
Lockhart patted Harry on the shoulder happily and said, "Do as I just did, Harry!" " "
"What, throw away your wand?" Harry said.
39. Professor Trelawney said that at the Christmas dinner for 13 people, the first person to leave the table would die. Harry and Ron are the same.
When she left her seat, she screamed in surprise, but Professor McGonagall said, "I don't think it makes any difference unless someone is crazy."
The thugs are waiting outside the door, intending to cut the first person who passes through the hall. "
Harry wanted to ask Mr Crouch if he would stop calling Percy "weatherby", but he resisted the temptation.
4 1. This is written by Ron to Harry.
If Muggles agree, please ask Piggy to send a reply, and we will pick you up on Thursday.
If they don't agree, please send a reply from the pig and we will pick you up on Thursday.
42. At this moment, Ron's brother Percy came over. "Good morning, everyone." Percy said briskly, "It's a nice day."
He sat in the only chair left, but immediately jumped up and took out a gray feather duster from under his ass-at least Harry thought it was a feather duster, and then he found it breathing.
"errol" Ron shouted.
43. Hogwarts students can enjoy preferential prices as long as they swear to drive away old bats with our products! !
44. "I don't have the heart to tell him," Fred said, looking at Ron in amazement. "Let me tell you ... when he missed the first 14 ball ..."
His arms are dancing wildly, as if he were doing a dog crawl.
"Well, I'll leave it at the party, huh?"
45. Everyone sings the school song intermittently. Only the Weasley twins continued to sing to the slow melody of Funeral March. Dumbledore used his wand to guide them to the last few bars. When they finished singing, his applause was the loudest.
46. "Devil's Web, Devil's Web ... What does Professor Sprout say? Remember it likes darkness and humidity-"
"Then order it!" Harry almost choked.
"Yes-of course-but there is no firewood here!" Hermione cried, twisting her hands anxiously.
"Are you crazy?" Ron roared, "Are you a witch or not?"
47. "I dare not, headmaster! If I sit down, there will be thirteen people at a table! There is nothing worse than thirteen! Don't forget that if thirteen people eat together, the first person to stand up after a meal will die first! "
"We are willing to take the risk, Sybil." Professor McGonagall said impatiently, "Sit down, the turkey is as cold as a stone."
48. "Who did you hit tonight?" Harry asked, the smile on his face disappearing. "Another ten-year-old boy? I know you hit Mark two days ago? According to Vance-"
"He asked for it." Dudley said grumpily.
"Oh, really?"
"He insulted me."
"Are you? Did he say you are like a pig walking on two legs? Hey, it's not an insult, Dada, it's a fact. "
49. "We have a new defense against the dark arts teacher, Professor Umbridge. She is almost as good as your mother. "
Fortunately, they only met Nick with no head on the road. He drifted around and accidentally sang a song, which sounded strikingly similar to Weasley is Our King.
5 1. "Now it's your turn-behave yourself this year. If the owl tells me you-you blew up a toilet, or-"
"Fried in the toilet? We have never bombed the toilet. "
"That's a good idea. Thank you very much, mom. "
"Don't cry, Ginny, we will send many owls to find you."
"Well, we'll give you a toilet seat at Hogwarts."
"George!"
"The Ministry of Magic will provide two cars tomorrow."
Everyone looked up at Mr Weasley.
"Why?" Percy asked curiously.
"This is for you, Percy," George said seriously. "There is a flag on the hat with the initials HB—— on it."
"-this is an incredibly big head." Fred said.
Everyone laughed at the pudding in front of them except Percy and Mrs Weasley.
53. "What's the matter? Why do freshmen take pictures? I don't like it. He may be a Slytherin spy and wants to spy on our new training plan. "
"He belongs to Gryffindor." Harry said quickly.
"Slytherin people don't need spies, Oliver." George said.
"How do you know?" Wood asked impatiently.
"Because they came by themselves." George said, pointing to the following.
54. "It's a pity that it doesn't have a parachute-in case you get too close to dementors."
Crabbe and Goyle snickered.
"It's a pity that you can't have the other arm, Malfoy," said Harry, "otherwise it can catch the Snitch for you."
55. Mrs Weasley: "Your lovely sons drove your lovely old car to save him in the middle of the night (Harry)."
Mr Weasley: "Really? Children, is its performance good? " -After seeing Mrs Weasley's face-"Oh, children, this is a very wrong move ..."
56. Ron said that he would rather be naked than wear that robe, so Mrs. Weasley said, "Then you can be naked. Harry, don't forget to take a picture of him. God bless me, I can have a good laugh. "
57. "What are you doing here?" Ron and Fred asked at the same time.
"Send a letter." Harry and George answered in unison.
"What, at this time?" Hermione and Fred said together.
58. "What are you up to?" Harry asked.
"Write a report to the International Ministry of Magic Cooperation," Percy said proudly. "We want to check the thickness of the crucible. The bottom of some foreign imported products is too thin-the leakage rate increases by 3% almost every year. "
"It's amazing. This report will change the world, "said Ron. "I think,
59. "Did you see me throw away Hermione's wand?" (Ron)
"Only once!" Hermione seems to have been stabbed.
"No, at least two or three times."
"Well, if you count the time when you tripped and knocked off my wand."
Fred said to Harry, we have seen Ron's training. He can still catch the ball without anyone, so we must turn all the spectators around in the game next week. "
"We have a new defense against the dark arts teacher, Professor Umbridge. She is almost as good as your mother. "
(Harry wrote a secret letter to Sirius)