What are the stages of interpersonal relationships?

Although the establishment of interpersonal relationships is diverse in form, some have been neighbors since childhood; some have been classmates for ten years; some have similar interests; some share weal and woe? However, From not knowing each other to forming friendship, there is usually a process of gradual deepening. Below I have compiled the stages of interpersonal relationships for you. I hope you will like them.

Three stages that interpersonal communication must go through

(1) Awareness stage

Awareness is the prerequisite for the development of interpersonal relationships, and no one is born with it. Friends always start with each other as the object of perception and communication. In the vast sea of ??people, some met across from each other; some passed by each other. Because there was no motive for interaction and no special attention, they disappeared without a trace as time passed. Only when one party is aware of the other party's existence and makes detailed perceptions and judgments can there be an expression of friendship and face-to-face communication.

(2) Surface contact stage

This is the most common relationship between people. For example, ordinary classmates, colleagues and neighbors may meet and interact with each other frequently, but that's all. When they come, they gather together, and when they leave, they disperse. It is just character contact without further emotional integration.

(3) Intimacy and reciprocity stage

After a stage of communication, each other goes from being familiar with each other to understanding each other, and from understanding to actively and enthusiastically caring and helping each other. This intimate and reciprocal relationship can be divided into three levels.

The first is the level of cooperation. For example, members of scientific research groups; members of amateur interest groups, classmates; teachers in the same teaching and research group, etc. This kind of interpersonal relationship connected by sexual intercourse is not very emotionally dependent. After separation, they may become indifferent to each other. It's just that we can get along well with each other during the same activities.

The second is the level of intimacy. At this time, there is greater emotional dependence on each other and insufficient inner communication. The two parties not only have the same activities, but also often get along with each other. They feel very happy living, studying and working together regardless of each other. When they are separated, they miss each other and miss each other very much after not seeing each other for a long time.

The third type is the level of acquaintances. At this time, each other occupies a very high status in each other's mind, they talk about everything, they are close friends with each other, and they are close to each other. The two parties not only have a strong emotional attachment, but also tend to be consistent in their views, attitudes, aspirations and goals. It is difficult to be broken apart by any external force. As Mencius said: "The most important thing for people to know each other is to know each other, and the most important thing for people to know each other is to know their hearts." This is the highest state of interpersonal relationships.

Principles of interpersonal communication

(1) Principle of equality: In socialist society, interpersonal communication must first adhere to the principle of equality. Whether it is official business or personal relationships, there is no distinction between high and low. , only by communicating as friends can we have a deep friendship. Don't feel inferior because of short working hours, lack of experience, or poor economic conditions. Don't be arrogant because you are a college graduate, young, and beautiful. These mentalities affect the smooth development of interpersonal relationships.

(2) The principle of compatibility: mainly psychological compatibility, that is, the harmonious relationship between people, tolerance, inclusion, tolerance and tolerance when getting along with others. Take the initiative to interact with people, make friends widely, and make good friends. Not only make friends with people similar to yourself, but also people with opposite personalities. Seek common ground while reserving differences, learn from each other and complement each other, handle competition and compatibility relationships well, and achieve better perfection. Own.

(3) The principle of mutual benefit: refers to the mutual benefit of both parties. Interpersonal communication is a two-way behavior, so there is a saying that "it is irrational to come and go without going back". Interpersonal communication that only benefits one party cannot last long. Therefore, both parties must benefit, not only materially, but also spiritually, so both parties in the relationship must pay attention to dedication and dedication.

(4) The principle of credit: Communication is inseparable from credit. Credit refers to a person who is honest, does not deceive, and keeps his or her promises. There is an ancient saying: "Once a word is spoken, it is hard to follow it." Nowadays, there is a principle of honesty. Don't make promises easily. Once you make a promise, you must try to fulfill it to avoid breaking trust. Between friends, one must be true to one's words and resolute in one's deeds, neither humble nor arrogant, dignified but not too reserved, humble but not pretentious, not flattering to please those with high status, and not despising those with low status. Show your self-confidence and gain the trust of others.

(5) The principle of tolerance: It is manifested in not fussing over non-principled issues, being able to repay resentment with kindness, and being tolerant and generous. Misunderstandings and contradictions often occur in interpersonal interactions. College students have strong personalities and close contact with each other, so conflicts are inevitable. This requires college students not to be fussy in their interactions, but to be humble, generous, restrained and tolerant, not to care about the other party's attitude or words, and to have the courage to take responsibility for their own actions, "so that the prime minister can hold the boat in his belly." He is noisy, but you are not; he is fierce, but you are not; he is scolded, but you are not scolded. As long as we are broad-minded and tolerant of others, the angry party will feel bored. Tolerance and restraint are not signs of weakness or cowardice. On the contrary, it is a measure of performance, a lubricant for establishing good interpersonal relationships, and can "turn conflicts into friendship" and win more friends.

Interpersonal Communication Skills

1. Whether at home, at work, or in other public places, when others are sleeping, you must know how to be quiet and pass by. Try to keep your footsteps as soft as possible. If you are a colleague in the same room, you should go outside to answer the phone while others are resting. Really, I think you have a deep understanding of this situation and there is no need to elaborate.

2. The most common way to lose a friend is to get too close. No matter how good the relationship is with someone, don’t just look at other people’s computers, mobile phones, files, etc. without their consent. Others may not criticize you face to face or show dissatisfaction, but they must be very taboo and disgusted with your behavior in their hearts, which will greatly reduce your ability to deal with others. Between friends, distance also creates beauty, and friendship with distance is the longest-lasting. .

3. When someone shows you a photo on their phone, just look at it. Don’t feel like it’s not enough. Just slide the next one by yourself, because maybe the next one will be that person’s spouse or person. I think everyone can imagine this embarrassing scene.

4. Men are often more interested in their girlfriend’s best friends, because their girlfriends are always whispering about their best friends, but men must not get to know your girlfriend’s best friends, because if their girlfriend’s best friends are not If you like you, you will say bad things about you in front of your girlfriend, and you will break up; if your girlfriend's best friend likes you, even if you don't like it at the time, you will fall in love with her as time goes by, and you and your girlfriend will still break up.

5. You must change your tendency to speak arrogantly when others get close to you, because you will lose your words if you talk too much. Especially to unfamiliar people, you should talk less; when others take the initiative to talk to you, When chatting, you think that the problem of people liking you must be corrected, because a sentimental person will not be popular with others, and your enthusiasm will be regarded as sentimental and immoral by others.

6. After explaining to others, replace "Did you understand?" with "Did I understand?". The difference between the two is that the latter likes to listen to you more than the former.

7. You must reply to the messages others send you. Even if it is someone you don’t like, or you are busy and don’t want to chat, you must tell him/her that not replying to messages is not being cold, but being cold. It's because you are uneducated, and people will feel like you are hot-faced but cold-butt. When you ask for something from others, you will feel what it feels like to be turned away.

8. Don’t tell dirty jokes to people you don’t know well, otherwise it will seriously lower your character in his/her mind; others can laugh at themselves, but you must not agree with them, because many people He just said it casually, but he will take your agreement seriously and think that you really look down on him (her).

9. I have seen gangsters with tattoos, dyed hair and earrings giving up their seats on the bus. I have also seen beasts in suits and leather shoes eating and drinking with public funds. People wearing clothes in this era may not necessarily look like dogs. He is a gentleman, and someone who dresses very sloppily does not necessarily mean he is a scumbag. Don't judge people by their appearance at any time, otherwise you will suffer a big loss. Please respect everyone, even beggars on the roadside begging for food.

10. Don’t get to know anyone too quickly. Don’t think that when you first start dating, you’ll feel like you’ve just met someone who has the same interests as you. You must know that polite words are interpersonal communication. The first step is that language is often false, and what you experience together is real. Don’t reveal too much about your family background before you figure out the real purpose of someone’s relationship with you.

11. Please remember, if you don’t say something in front of others, don’t say it behind your back. There is no airtight wall. Before the words are spoken, you are the master of them, and after they are spoken, you are the slave of them. If you continue to speak ill of others behind their backs and it reaches their ears, they will definitely speak ill of you behind their backs, and you won't even know why you are crying.

12. A person who often talks about "Thank you" will not be too popular. A person who is not too popular will not have too few opportunities. A person who has many opportunities will have a higher probability of success. It's big. Although it's just a simple "Thank you", it has a huge impact.

13. Whether a woman is excellent does not depend on whether she is popular among men. She is popular among men just because she is a woman; it depends on whether she can play well among women. , to be outstanding among women, but not to make other women jealous, that is what is truly powerful.

14. There are two kinds of people among your friends and relatives who are most worthy of your trust: one is the person who lends you money for a long time without saying a word, and the other is the person who keeps his promise and pays you back the money on time. Among your relatives and friends, there are two types of people who are least worthy of your friendship: one is those who borrow money and cannot pay it back on time, and the other is those who try to lend you money and take advantage of you just because you have money.

15. When interacting with others, be a straightforward person and don’t beat around the bush. If you have something to say, say it. Don’t wait for the other person to guess, because the other person is not you and doesn’t know what you want. What, everyone is very busy and has no patience to play with you. In the end, you will only be sad and disappointed, especially when it comes to relationships.

16. In a threesome, if one person walks slowly, you two should wait for him or her. Three people are eating together. After the food is served, one person is on the phone. You two wait for him or her to hang up the phone before using chopsticks together.

17. When you are frustrated, failed or lost, most people will say to you: "What's wrong?" They just want to satisfy his or her curiosity and have no intention of helping you.

When others ask, you will chirp and talk a lot, which will make others annoyed. You must know that no one, including you, likes negative energy. When others care, you just answer with a smile: "It's okay, thank you." ?

18. Interrupting someone else’s speech is like interrupting someone else’s joy. This is a very rude thing. You should all have experienced it, so there is no need to go into details here.