Episode 1:

1. Zi Qiao: Zeng Xiaoxian, you are a man, and what should excite you is your devilish figure rather than your devilish stepmother!

2. Xiaoxian: Huh, yesterday my right eyelid twitched and you said I had an affair.

Zi Qiao: You don’t understand. The peach blossom blooms in the left eye and the chrysanthemum blooms in the right eye. As the saying goes...just like a spring breeze coming overnight, all the flowers in spring bloom!

3. Xiaoxian: No, "The Devil's Stepmother" only has 24 episodes.

Sekiya: But you have also watched 40 episodes of "Where is My Mother", 80 episodes of "Don't Cry After Divorce", and 160 episodes of "Being a Wife and a Mother-in-law" . Congratulations...you have lived a woman's life!

4. Yifei: We are guests with status, don’t act like the decoration team.

5. Xiaoxian: Am I new—new—new? In the first season, I was the main character!

6. Yifei: Listen, the previous pattern was Zhanbo, Wanyu and me. Now that they are together, they become Zhan Bo, Wanyu (Dun) and me. Do you understand?

Sekiya: Oh! I know. This is the Chinese sentence segmentation exercise I often do.

7. Director: Little girl, this is called a magical and tragic drama in ancient costume. Nowadays, if you only make action movies, there will be aunties and mothers to watch. If you don't have a mother-in-law, a debtor, and a third party, you can't even think about getting a prime time movie.

8. Xiaoxian: Wait, let me give you a hint. The good man is me, I am...Zeng...

Zhang Wei: Brother Zeng! Admired for a long time.

9. Zi Qiao: Since ancient times, no one has ever died. No matter who dies early or dies late, he or she will die

Episode 2:

1. Zi Qiao: Narcissism plus Brain damage, that is self-inflicted harm!

2. Zhang Wei: That smile is sweet and elegant, as if the spring breeze blows over Lugu Lake and the autumn rain soaks Jiuzhaigou.

3. Xiaoxian: Let’s face it, life is often much heavier than those idol dramas.

4. Xiaoxian: Zi Qiao, you are here at the right time. Tell Zhang Wei, are there more "beautiful women" or "desire women" in this world?

Zi Qiao: Of course, there are many women.

5. Zi Qiao: The worst thing happened. The two women who hated me the most came together.

3. Zhang Wei: There is a famous saying that flowers often belong not to the people who appreciate them, but to the cow dung.

4. Life is indeed a live broadcast. Not only the ratings are low, but the salary is not high!

5. Zhang Wei: Failure is indeed common, but I have never won! I thought Mo Lan was the person I was looking for, but she actually thought I was not a rich second generation!

Zi Qiao: The second generation of rich people?

Zhang Wei: The salary is enough to pay for the house loan and car loan, as well as the second mortgage!

6. Xiaoxian: OK, if you have the guts, then I will tell her that Guangu has liked you for a long time.

Guangu: What nonsense are you talking about.

Xiao Xian: Ha! You're still pretending. I saw it from the last time Youyou went to the audition. Her pupils were dilated and she was restless. You also kneaded the more than 20 packs of instant noodles I bought back into flour by you!

1. Yifei: I always thought he was the number between 1 and 3, but I didn’t expect that he also said the combination of 1 and 3

2. Agent A: What do you mean? ?

Zi Qiao: Nai Yi Zu Te.

Agent A: What if he doesn’t come?

Zi Qiao: Not coming? A special group

3. Yifei: A good dog doesn’t block the road, and everything that blocks the road is a roadblock.

4. Xiaoxian: Hahaha! If the tiger doesn't send the cat away, you think I'm critically ill!

5. Agent A: Leniency if you confess, severity if you resist. Say, what is your name?

Xiao Xian: My name is Jackie Chan.

Agent A: Why isn’t your name Chen Zhen? Please correct your attitude. What is your name?

Xiaoxian: My name is Chen Zhen. ...I said, I said, my name is Brother Zeng, my real name is Brother Zeng, believe me!

6. Zi Qiao: I was volunteered!

7. Yu Mo: Although a man who buys you a diamond ring may not be trustworthy, a man who refuses to even buy you a diamond ring must be unreliable.

8. Yoyo: Don’t take a girl home casually. If you think you are taking advantage of her, she is actually much more dangerous than you think. Unless - she is your relative.

9. Zi Qiao: If your friends are playing Story Solitaire, be sure to participate and never walk away alone. Otherwise, you never know what disgusting role they may assign you! Episode 13:

1. Xiaoxian: Gossip is the fourth instinct of human beings.

2. Yifei: Don’t you think you two look alike?

Zi Qiao: Do ??all handsome people have to look like me?

3. Zi Qiao: Mr. Guan, we have been friends for so many years, you have to help me this time. If you can help me get through this difficult time, I, Lu Xiaobu, swear that I will never, ever, ever, ever, never go to Kaixin.com again.

4. Zhang Wei: I finally understand who the third person on the toilet sign is. Man, woman, Hu Yifei!

Zi Qiao: This is just an appearance. Let me tell you, the source of wisdom and life, you must know how to use your eyes to discover stories. If you look carefully, you will find that the third person must be Zeng Xiaoxian!

Zhang Wei: Teacher Zeng, why?

Zi Qiao: Because his legs are short.

5. Zi Qiao: I told her that I left her because I was from Naweixing. I said that my planet needed to be rebuilt, so I left.

6. Yoyo : You can also drink this. The instructions say that this milk powder can be drunk until the age of six

7. Yifei: There is a song that goes like this: Cut off the water with a knife, and the water will flow more, and people will not repair it.< /p>

Episode 14:

1. Yifei: I always thought he was the number between 1 and 3, but I didn’t expect him to say the combination of 1 and 3

Zi Qiao: Nai Yi Zu Te.

Agent A: What if he doesn’t come?

Zi Qiao: Not coming? A special group

3. Yifei: A good dog doesn’t block the road, and everything that blocks the road is a roadblock.

4. Xiaoxian: Hahaha! If the tiger doesn't send the cat away, you think I'm critically ill!

5. Agent A: Leniency if you confess, severity if you resist. Say, what is your name?

Xiao Xian: My name is Jackie Chan.

Agent A: Why isn’t your name Chen Zhen? Please correct your attitude. What is your name?

Xiaoxian: My name is Chen Zhen. ...I said, I said, my name is Brother Zeng, my real name is Brother Zeng, you believe me!

6. Zi Qiao: I was volunteered!

7. Yu Mo: Although a man who buys you a diamond ring may not be trustworthy, a man who refuses to buy you a diamond ring must not be trustworthy.

8. Yoyo: Don’t take a girl home casually. If you think you are taking advantage of her, she is actually much more dangerous than you think. Unless - she is your relative.

9. Zi Qiao: If your friends are playing Story Solitaire, be sure to participate and never walk away alone. Otherwise, you never know what disgusting role they may assign you!

Episode 15:

1. Zhang Wei: Today is not the Chinese New Year. Is there any law that stipulates that if I don’t send a red envelope, I should be despised?

Xiaoxian: The law does not stipulate that despising you requires your consent.

2. Yifei: Calm down, calm down. I can't eat hot tofu in a hurry.

Xiao Xian: Well, if you are not in a hurry, the tofu will probably be eaten by others!

3. Zhang Wei: Please, don’t pick up the pot that is not open.

Yu Mo: Then I will open the pot that is open.

4. Xiaoxian: Who is Junko? She is so charming,

Yuyou: Sadako’s sister downstairs

Episode 16:

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1. Yifei: The longer I communicate with her, the more I like pigs. Pigs are always pigs, and people are sometimes not people!

2. Yoyo: Wow, Zhang Wei actually found a girlfriend who has written a book.

Sekiya: Yes, these days, it would be nice to find someone who has read a book.

3. Yifei: I will not argue with idiots, otherwise others will not be able to tell who is an idiot.

4. Guangu: Didn’t you just say that as long as there is love, age is not a problem

Yuyou: I said age, but there are growth rings on her forehead< /p>

5. Zhang Wei: She spent ten years doing archeology in South Africa and published three books in five years

Ziqiao: You said she spent ten years digging holes. It took five years to post?

Episode 17:

1. Zi Qiao: The junior sister becomes a wife, and the cuckold will stay in her heart

2. Zi Qiao: If she wants to hang out in the world, she will eventually It’s good to be a bachelor

3. Yifei: Aren’t you quite calm?

Zhang Wei: I found that not only am I calm, but my balls hurt

4. Yifei: If you want to live a good life, you must have some green in your body

Episode 18:

1. Xiaoxian: As we all know, Comrade Hu Yifei is one of the many residents of our love apartment. A wonderful flower, with her unique personality charm, she has held many records in the apartment over the years, including:

The most unreasonable.

The most nosy person.

Highest academic qualifications.

The loudest.

Also - the best at fighting.

2. Yifei: Please don’t wear skirts to my classes in the future, otherwise I will punish her by standing on her head.

3. Yifei: Are you the flower girl, Hua Mulan or Hua Wuque?

4. Youyou: If you save four and a half yuan, and I save four and a half yuan, we can go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to register. Then we will give birth to a baby. I have already thought of a name. It will be called "Hao Handsome". Then when people see you, they will say: "What a handsome dad!"

5. Yu Mo: 28 years old What's wrong, what I hate most is age discrimination! Huang Zhong followed Liu Bei when he was sixty, Tokugawa Ieyasu conquered the world at seventy, Jiang Ziya became prime minister at eighty, Taijun She took command at a hundred years old, Sun Wukong went to the west to learn Buddhist scriptures when he was over five hundred years old, and Bai Suzhen went down the mountain to fall in love when she was over a thousand years old! !

6. Yifei: I am a human being too.

Xiao Xian: No, no, you are not human, you are lonely.

7. Yifei: Humph, just continue on your mediocre life path. My students will never let me down, they will trample your wretched outlook on life with a hearty victory.

8. Xiaoxian: If you step on a banana peel and fall down, you must get up and continue stepping on it. If you step on it, it will stop slipping.

9. Xiaoxian: You are born in the 1970s. I was born in 1994 and my growth was too early.

10. Yifei: This is the turning point of your life.

Xiaoxian: This is not a turning point, but a breaking point.

Episode 19:

1. Xiaoxian: Occupying a tomb after death finally made up for the regret of not being able to buy a house during his lifetime

2. Yumo: I'm allergic to time

3. Xiaoxian: Can you live in this city, are you afraid that you won't survive in the wild?

4. Yifei: Do you want to get pregnant before the age of 30?

Xiao Xian: I want to be a millionaire

Yifei: It is more likely that I am pregnant, the amniotic fluid is almost filling my brain.

5. Yifei: Even if you cannot create wealth, it is still possible to create some firewood

6. Yifei: This is your road to success, but it may still be under construction , wear a safety helmet

7. Yoyo: Will there still be Sina in fifty years? Yifei: You can search it on Baidu and you will know.

8. Yoyo: I’m afraid there won’t be a CD-ROM drive to read it by then. Do you think that Blu-ray has already begun to be popularized, and there won’t be red-ray by then? , Bai Guang, and Sima Guang have all come out. I want to go to the museum to read a DVD.

9. Yu Mo: Talking about a large size in vain means you will have fangs

10. Zi Qiao: Guan Gu, do you think my avatar looks like a cow? Guan Gu: Like, like

11. Yifei: I said "if". This is a rhetorical device to express my humanitarian support for you.

12. Yoyo: I refuse to appear on the same screen with you

13. Question: What is the name of Big Big Wolf’s wife in the cartoon Xi Yangyang and Big Big Wolf

A Red Taro B Red Sun C Red Boy D Hong Jinbao

14. Xiaoxian: A group of doctors jointly promoted sales. I thought that Sleep Day was invented by a group of mattress sellers, and that Housing Day , it must be caused by real estate. How can ordinary people remember to live for so many days without taking holidays?

Episode 20:

1. Shao Bo: Look at the lighter. Also engraved with letters

Zhang Wei: SB.

2. Moderator: Do you usually play video games?

Xiao Xian: Occasionally

Moderator: Star or World of Warcraft

Xiao Xian Xian: Lianliankan

3. Xiaoxian: It turns out that all customs and habits were invented by idle people

4. Xiaoxian is drunk: I am always happy The little white dove ~ I want to fly, fly, don’t touch my wings

5. B or D vote your choice to decide the direction of the sequel

6. Lu Ziqiao: No matter how old we are, as long as our faith is young, we will still be young. I want to prove to her that old age is not the worst thing, but the old heart is the scariest thing. When the heart is old, youth really cannot be saved.

7. Lu Ziqiao: We cannot jump to the next stop in one breath, the process is the most important.