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Abstinence famous saying
On the way to get along with couples who get rid of evil deeds.

Prostitution is aimed at prohibited behavior in the family. In the past, when King Songtsan Gampo of Tibet was in power, he stipulated sixteen ten virtues of protection, in which it was expressly stipulated that family members must abide by the ethics of human relations, that is, to protect their words and deeds by caste, to be strict with themselves by the right law, to prohibit lewdness, to abide by the law and to observe the precepts. In fact, there was such a tradition in the Han dynasty, especially in ancient times, people paid special attention to it.

One such ethics comes from traditional culture and national customs; One is derived from precepts, such as three conversions and five precepts at home, and the precepts of becoming a monk, that is, mindfulness and the protection of mindfulness are continuous. In fact, it is relatively easy to restrain yourself in the second way. Otherwise, it may be unrealistic for a particularly relaxed person to force him not to smoke, drink or eat meat, but also to abide by a series of commandments such as not to commit adultery and not to talk nonsense. Only by letting him know that what he insists on in this life has no real meaning to the environment and will destroy the happiness in the afterlife, then it will not be particularly troublesome for him to abide by the commandments. Take abstinence from meat as an example. Now people care about their health. If they know that eating meat is bad for their health, there will be no problem in abstaining from meat.

So generally speaking, it is difficult to get rid of the greed of ordinary people in other ways, and we can only rely on wisdom. "Mindfulness of the Confucian Classics" says: "Put out the fire of greed, take wisdom as water, don't put out the greedy people, and you can't get rid of them." This means that if you want to put out the intense fire of greed, you must rely on cold water without my wisdom, otherwise, the liberation of the person who has not put out the fire is out of reach for him.

In fact, the reason why a person commits adultery is because there is an irrational intention to hang other people's bodies upside down as clean, true and common. If we can remember the advantages and strength of good law, this greed can be removed. "Great Wisdom" also said: "How can we stay away from all desires? If you can enjoy Buddhism, this desire will naturally rest. " All kinds of five desires are hard to give up on the environment How can we get rid of them? If you like the good dharma, the buddhas and bodhisattvas, the lofty monks and great virtues, and the wonderful method of worrying, you will practice according to it and want to die naturally.

So many monks in the world are full of happiness all the time on the road of seeking liberation. What is the reason? It is because they thoroughly realized the pain of reincarnation, but also realized the extraordinary victory of knowing liberation. Therefore, if you want to free the world from the bondage of desire, you must explain to them the fault of greed and the merit of liberation. Of course, in addition, we must find the convenience to eliminate troubles, otherwise it is only theoretically accessible, but there is no way to treat troubles, or it is difficult to control unreasonable things such as greed.

Nowadays, many young people, due to age, physiology and other reasons, plus the influence of bad habits in their previous lives, sometimes find it difficult to restrain their greed in the face of the excellent situation before them. However, if you adjust your mind in the way of Buddhism Hinayana or Mahayana, you can naturally overcome your troubles. Even if we can understand the special teaching of Tantric Buddhism that "worry is self-liberation", or understand the realm of "worry is bodhi" in the Six Ancestors Tanjing, then self-continuity will not be polluted by worry. When greed, anger and delusion arise, we will know that it is empty, so that we can fully realize the true colors of everything in the world.

Therefore, the key to practice is to constantly observe the self-mind. Whether you have impure thoughts such as greed and anger, or pure thoughts such as self-confidence, compassion and abandonment, you should first distinguish whether these are good or evil in famous sayings. If it is evil, we should treat it with the teachings of the guru and the tricks of Buddha and Bodhisattva. Only in this way can we be pure and flawless, and gradually realize the reality of the universal law dominated by troubles.

In fact, it is very difficult to learn Buddhism. Some people have studied it for more than 20 years, but their troubles seem to grow stronger every day. It's not difficult to say, but it's not too difficult. Some people have undergone earth-shaking changes in a short time after meeting Buddhism, and they have completely become another person. Some of our Taoist friends are like this. After leaving home, his former colleagues and friends felt incredible about his changes. In the past, when he was at home, he was very worried, greedy and angry, but now he is very gentle. Seeing his transformation, everyone naturally had confidence in Buddhism, thinking that Buddhism is the best way to adjust their mentality, and then gradually became a Buddhist.

Let's go back to what we just said: In ancient Tibet, people observed interpersonal ethics and had rules at home, and everyone paid special attention. In fact, in the book "Good Life" of Buddhism, family ethical relations are also promoted. The Buddha elaborated on what duties a wife should perform and what duties a husband should perform. There are several existing versions of this classic, although the content is slightly different, but they are all promoting the way for couples to get along.

So, how should a husband treat his wife?

First, "pity your wife." Be considerate and care for your wife, and both husband and wife should respect each other and treat each other with courtesy. They shouldn't be inseparable at first, but later they became sworn enemies.

Second, "Don't be slow." You shouldn't despise your wife, especially you shouldn't speak ill of each other. Nowadays, many couples in the world have no respect for each other, even the most basic manners, which is not good. As the venerable Padamba said, it is also fate for husband and wife to get together, so don't insult each other.

Third, "be strict." Provide all kinds of conveniences for the wife and decorate her to show her love.

Fourth, "Be at home." Trust your wife fully, let her have some freedom at home and do housework without too much interference. However, I heard that some husbands now treat their wives completely as servants and give them no rights except housework. If they live like this for a long time, their families will inevitably be unhappy.

Fifth, "miss your wife and relatives." Always trust your wife and don't feel alienated. Another explanation is that you should care about your wife's relatives and be polite to her family. )

In addition, the scripture also talks about how a wife should serve her husband, a total of thirteen articles. In this regard, Master Taixu also has related comments.

In today's society, couples often don't respect each other, so the family is not harmonious; If the family is not harmonious, the unit or group will be restless; There will be no peace between the country and the world if there are constant struggles among groups. Therefore, everyone should start from himself first, especially between husband and wife. It is very important to abide by morality, otherwise once you have an affair, it will definitely lead to many mistakes.

In "A Treasure Mirror", Master Yin Guang talked about twelve kinds of harms of lewdness: harm to family, harm to people's festival, harm to honor, harm to family style, harm to life, harm to mentality, harm to customs, harm to yin, harm to fame and fortune, harm to life, harm to grandfather and harm to wife. It can be seen that adulterers harm others and themselves, and the protectors of the laws of the world will not protect them. Therefore, as a family member, we should keep the three precepts of purity and conversion.

As a monk, we must fundamentally put an end to non-Brahma. "Zhong A Jing" says: "Practice Sanskrit diligently, be diligent and skillful, be pure and clean, and stay to break your virginity." A real monk should practice pure Sanskrit diligently, make his body and mind clean and spotless, stay away from the greed of endless suffering in this life and the next, and completely cut off all unclean behaviors.

You know, profligacy is particularly serious, and it will also encourage the destruction of other commandments. So, what are the classifications of fornication? Men who make their own sperm and engage in immoral activities with other people's wives or paid women all belong to this category. Moreover, even if the object is your wife, if you have sex during the day, fasting day, illness, pregnancy, depression, menstruation, and labor has not recovered, these are also lewd. In addition, prostitution also includes adultery with immediate family members, underage girls, or adultery in the mouth, anus, etc., or adultery with strangers and corpses.

If you can get rid of prostitution, don't invade other people's wives, don't commit adultery with your own wife, and provide bedding for those who keep the precepts clean, you can reincarnate in the clean brake soil in the afterlife. "Nirvana Sutra" says: "If you don't commit another wife, you can't live in a country unless your wife is bedding." Therefore, as a family member, we should understand different types of obscene things from the perspective of environment and time, and then cut them off together.

In fact, in the family, there are also people who completely give up their lust. For example, Gandhi, India's "Mahatma", advocated non-violence and vegetarianism all his life and was highly respected by people with lofty ideals in the East and West. He made a lifelong vow of "abstinence" between husband and wife in 1906, when he was only 37 years old. Practice has proved that he has always insisted. And Liang Wudi in the Han Dynasty, who cut off sexual intercourse at the age of 50. He also mentioned in Dedication: "I don't live with concubines ..."

It can be seen that even family members with status and power can live a very clean life and abide by the five precepts of three conversions. Of course, Gandhi does not necessarily adhere to the three conversions and five precepts of Buddhism, but in India, there are also some precepts similar to Buddhism, even stricter than Buddhism. It is of great benefit to discipline yourself with traditional customs or religious precepts in this life and the next. However, some precepts, such as the Interpretation of the Solemnity in the Middle View, are just heresy; There are also some folk taboos. Although these are not real commandments, if they are desirable, they cannot be completely abandoned.

It's a pity that young people nowadays have poor ideas in this respect. They don't live, sit and lie down according to certain rules like the ancients. For them, it doesn't matter what they do as long as they eat and dress well and satisfy their senses. There is no concept of "allowing" or "not allowing" at all. Therefore, as a person, we should protect many rules in the world and know what to do and what not to do. It is important to have such an idea.