Ben Jonson also said: Language can reveal a person the most. As long as you speak, I can understand you.

The power of language is huge, and it can also reveal a person's cultivation.

Water drops penetrate the stone, and softness overcomes hardness. Speech should be like water, and it should be soft and gentle.

Speak softly, as the spring breeze turns into rain, moistening things silently. Soft language and words are like the breeze, which can resolve conflicts and enhance emotions.

Be hard-working, steady and powerful, neither arrogant nor impetuous, and a firm pace of progress can get twice the result with half the effort.

1 Speak softly

○ If the tone is wrong, your words will be in vain

Speak softly, and the softness lies in your tone.

In real life, many people have good intentions, and their words are kind, but after they are spoken, they change their tone. They are obviously concerned, but they turn into accusations. This is a problem with the tone of speech. .

Guiguzi once said: "The mouth is the door of the heart, and all wisdom and wisdom come from it."

When talking to others, you should not be too arrogant or belittle yourself. Whether it is a commanding tone or a flattering tone, it will make people uncomfortable. Over time, friends will stay away from you.

Gong Hua has a famous saying: "Singing wonderfully has nothing to do with the tongue, but passion is in the waist. As long as it comes from the heart and comes from nature, any language can achieve good results."

When speaking to others, the most important thing is to speak in a sincere and calm tone.

When Zeng Guofan was an official in Beijing in his early years, he was domineering and spoke in an arrogant tone. As a result, he lost many friends and made many political enemies, which laid many hidden dangers for his career as an official.

Speak well, be sincere and speak softly.

○ Speak softly, and the relationship will be worry-free

Speak softly first, and express your words secondly. The art of language is broad and profound. It is not as objective and rational as numbers, and its expression must be flexible.

Language can sometimes enhance actions, but sometimes it can be counterproductive. Speaking directly does not apply to any situation, and some words cannot be said.

Think twice before speaking, put yourself in someone else’s shoes, and consider the other person’s feelings. Pay attention to your wording when speaking, and indirect expressions can avoid misunderstandings and enhance the relationship between both parties.

We often say that the Chinese language is profound. The same sentence spoken in different words can express completely different meanings and express very different feelings. The same word can be praised or criticized in different contexts.

Any relationship needs to be maintained and managed, and no matter how good a friend is, he or she should be careful when speaking.

"The speaker has no intention, but the listener has intention." The breakdown of every relationship is caused by the wording of words.

Zeng Guofan was "circle on the outside and square on the inside", but this kind of roundness on the outside and square on the inside was not inherent. When he first became an official, Zeng Guofan also suffered a lot due to improper wording of his words.

The key is that after suffering a loss, Zeng Guofan reflected on his words and gradually developed the habit of speaking considerately to others.

Zeng Guofan often warned his sons and nephews not to speak without restraint and to consider others.

Speak softly, don’t be too quick to talk, control your emotions, put yourself in others’ shoes and be considerate.

2 You have to be tough in doing things

○ If you don’t have the ability, you can’t last long

You have to be tough in doing things, that is, you have to have real skills.

Nowadays, many people want a stable job. There is a saying that "the only constant in the world is 'change' itself.

The current stable job will be in the near future. It may have disappeared. Only stable ability is real stability!

The vase is beautiful, but it is just a decoration. A person has no ability. He is good at talking but has no ability in practice.

Even if the opportunity is right in front of you, you can only watch it helplessly. If you cannot seize it, others will no longer trust you.

Zeng Guofan set his goal from the beginning on improving his own abilities. , whether it is reading or learning from others, it never stops.

It is precisely because of his excellent skills that he was able to establish the Hunan Army, win again and again in wars, and become one of the four famous officials in the late Qing Dynasty.

You have to be tough in doing things. Only by constantly improving your abilities can you have the confidence and be tough in doing things.

People should never give up learning. Failure to learn means being eliminated and having no ability, just like water without roots or a tree without roots, which cannot last long.

○ Keep the bottom line of principles in mind

Be firm in doing things, have bottom lines and principles, and don’t be a good person.

A person always listens to the opinions of others and never has his own opinions and opinions.

He usually seems to have a good relationship with everyone, but when the critical moment comes, no one is willing to listen to his opinion.

Be tough and stick to the bottom line. If the bottom line is breached, it will be difficult to look back.

Breaking through is easy, but persistence is difficult. Many people cannot hold on and give up their principles. It is difficult to regain them and they also go astray.

Zeng Guofan was able to navigate the officialdom with ease not by being all-around good, but by adhering to principles and always adhering to his own bottom line.

We should also have our own red lines in our daily lives. Sometimes being cruel is a kind of kindness, but having no bottom line is a kind of evil. The difficulty in being a human being is to stick to the bottom line after distinguishing right from wrong.

Be tough, capable, principled and have a bottom line.

Speak like water, be soft or gentle, use appropriate wording, and have a sincere tone; work is like a mountain, be firm but steady, improve your abilities, and stick to your principles.