Love means that men and women form the most sincere love for each other in their own hearts based on certain objective material basis and the same ideal of life, and they are eager for each other to become their lifelong partners. There are several points to emphasize here.
Objective material basis: We say that love can't make material requirements based on the standard of quick success and instant benefit, but we can't live a spiritual utopia without considering a certain material basis. I believe that as long as you have feelings, you can solve everything. After a certain period of love, it is more a matter of actual material life.
It is very important that * * * has the same life ideal and the most sincere admiration. Both sides must have the same ideal of life. To put it bluntly, they have a common language. For example, all of you here are college students with higher education. Therefore, it is basically impossible to fall in love with people who have never attended school or rarely attended school. I'm talking about the general situation here. On the one hand, we don't have more opportunities to get in touch with such people. On the other hand, if the two sides don't have the same prediction, it is difficult to communicate for a long time. In addition, the feelings of both sides should be sincere, and love without emotional support will not be long-term love. Everyone should understand this truth.
Third, I long for each other to be my lifelong partner. Obviously, love and marriage are linked. It is irresponsible and immoral to love only for love and not for marriage.
The strongest, most stable and single-minded is the characteristic of love. Let's talk about it below.
(B) the characteristics of love
Love has the characteristics of sociality, equality, specificity, dependence and autonomy, among which:
1. Equality: As a high degree of unity of human physiological and psychological needs, love is reflected in mutual respect, mutual trust and mutual concern between two people. This is an equal relationship, not a relationship of dependence and possession. This equal relationship is manifested in the fact that both men and women can pursue and love each other, so that love can come into being and develop. Some students will say, I don't care if you love me or not. I just love you anyway. If I catch up, there will be love. I said that such love violates the principle of equality. The example of Bobo mentioned above is roughly like this.
In addition, Engels also said: "Love is based on the mutual love of the loved ones on the blackboard". Let's look at the meaning of mutual love: 1. The two lovers must first respect each other's right to choose voluntarily. It is not love that one party forces the other, or makes do with it. Everyone has the right to love and be loved. So chasing each other is not love. Second, unrequited love is not love. The reason is obvious.
The equality of love is more manifested in respecting each other's personality. In other words, love needs to be paid twice. A classmate in the mid-term exam gave me a good example, saying that love is like multiplication. One person pays all and the other person doesn't pay at all, so the result is 1X0=0 = 0. If everyone pays 0.5, then love is 0.5X0.5=0.25. Therefore, it is obvious that love needs the joint efforts of both parties. The more you pay, the more stable and beautiful love can be.
2. Concrete: When I was in college, there was a female classmate in our class. Although she has been in love with someone else, she still has to continue to date other boys alone. When other boys invited her to dinner, she invited her to play. She really takes everything. We say this violates the second characteristic of love, singleness. Engels pointed out that love is exclusive in essence. Once love comes into being, it has this characteristic, so you say why there are so many jealous people, right? The specificity and exclusiveness of love show that we should treat love seriously and carefully. If a person falls in love with two or more opposite sex at the same time, it can't be healthy true love.
3. Dependence: Students who have talked about love will realize that when they are in love, they will always feel very worried if the other half is not around. This is the dependence of love. The two sides in love are attached to each other emotionally, support each other in action and care about each other in life. Some students don't estimate each other's feelings when they fall in love, but only care about their own feelings. We say that this also violates the interdependence of love and is a kind of selfish love.
4. Autonomy: Some students think that falling in love must be approved by their parents, while some parents say that my girl or my son must be approved by me, which is more common among boys. When I was in college, a classmate said, I don't know what kind of object to find, but my mother agreed. Will everyone agree with this classmate's point of view? Although we emphasize the autonomy of love here, I think parents are experienced people and can still give us some reference, but the final decision of love is still in our own hands.
Love without marriage is not protected by law, which is just my humble opinion.