Waiting for the flowers to bloom

The key to waiting for the flowers to bloom is the word "wai". To wait is to wait. After the preliminary watering, fertilizing, soil loosening, weeding, and pest control... under the conditions of sufficient sunlight, suitable temperature and humidity, the flowering period has arrived, but the flowers will not bloom, how big they will bloom, and how long they will bloom. Wait, there is no rush.

The front has been dedicated to supporting and cultivating, but at this time, there is only one word "waiting". The beauty of everything in the world lies in this unknowability, which is why there are surprises.

Zeng Guofan has a famous saying, "Don't ask about harvest, but ask about hard work." Just like waiting for the flowers to bloom, it has the same purpose but the same purpose. There is also a saying, "But do good deeds and don't worry about the future." This also means the same thing.

Give as much as you can and wait for the flowers to bloom.

In the morning, while jogging, listen to the radio. It's about early childhood education.

The interviewed guest is an early childhood education practitioner who runs an early childhood education institution. She has visited many countries, including the United States, Europe, Japan and South Korea. Her conclusion is that foreign parents are more relaxed and their children are more independent.

How do they do this?

The advice she gave after the inspection was that the most important thing for parents is to learn to wait.

She gave an example.

In a kindergarten in Japan, there are nearly 30 children, ranging in age from 8 months to more than two years old.

Children at such a young age can learn to wear their own clothes and shoes with the encouragement and guidance of their teachers. And I will also follow the teacher to learn "cloth shoes", which is to arrange the shoes neatly on the ground or on the shoe rack.

This was impossible in my previous understanding. It turns out that children have such great potential.

The most important thing for teachers to do this is to give children enough time when they learn to wear clothes or shoes, so that they can slowly understand it. Even if they wear something wrong, they don't correct it. Instead, they let the children feel uncomfortable and they will naturally adjust themselves.

My own experience in raising children is that after the child tries once or twice but fails, he becomes more and more dependent on me. When the child wears clothes or shoes that are inside out, he is repeatedly asked to change them. Does this behavior hinder the development of children's independent spirit? There should be.

She also specifically talked about the teacher’s roll call.

When the teacher clicks on the child's name, he does not ask the child to answer "yes" immediately, but waits for the child's attention to turn. This time may sometimes be a minute or two. Sometimes it may be a look that means "I understand", sometimes it may be a knowing smile. In short, it is good for the child to express something.

Through this approach, children can associate their own names with themselves in a way that they can accept, and also associate other names with children, so that children can know that they are in a group.

This kind of practice that is subtle and close to children's psychological habits, especially waiting patiently, is worth learning from.

From time to time on the Internet, parents complain about their collapse experiences when helping their children with homework.

When I was doing homework with my son, I also had this kind of crazy moment.

My son’s math scores are pretty good, so there’s basically no need to worry. But he is very indifferent to new words and words. He often mentions a word or word incorrectly this time, gets it wrong the next time, and gets it wrong again the third time. What makes people even more angry is his nonchalant attitude, as if it was me who was wrong and not him.

This also happens with other things. For example, if your son doesn’t think the dishes or socks are clean enough, he won’t be allowed to do them. The result is that the son becomes less and less willing to do the work, and he feels at ease as a hands-off shopkeeper who can "stretch out his hands for clothes and open his mouth for food".

Seriously reflecting, waiting is not enough. Children grow up in a regular pattern, and we all know the stories about how to encourage growth, but when it comes to specific things, they start to get impatient.

Waiting is a kind of belief. I believe in the potential of children, and I believe that as long as time is given, children will definitely be better than others.

Waiting is a kind of tolerance. Tolerate the child's temporary failure, tolerate the child's temporary clumsiness, and tolerate the child's temporary stumble.

Waiting is a rhythm. One piece and one piece of relaxation, the way of civility and martial arts. Sometimes when raising children, you need to slow down, let go, and give your children time and space to find their own world.