Spirit Spider

I am just an ordinary spider, an ugly and humble creature in the world, and I am an extraordinary spider, because I tie the spider web into Under the eaves of Xitian Leiyin Temple.

Every day I listen to the bursts of wooden fish and pieces of Sanskrit sounds from the monks chanting sutras; I enjoy the incense offerings from good men and women all over the world.

Slowly, I began to gain spirituality, and I was able to understand some difficult and profound Dharma principles. Finally, one day, Buddha felt my presence and my progress.

The Buddha asked me: "Zhu'er, what is the most valuable thing in the world for you?" I replied carefully: "I believe that all things in the world are not valuable. There are only two of them. One said they have been lost, and the other "I can't get it." I'm very proud of my answer.

But the Buddha said: "Zhuer, you are wrong." Am I wrong? Is it really wrong?

The Buddha is going to travel in the clouds. Before he left, he told me to let me understand it carefully. He will still ask me when he comes back.

I don’t know how long it took, but it seemed like a thousand years, and the Buddha came back. As soon as he saw me, the Buddha asked me:

"It has been a thousand years, what do you think?"

I was speechless. I don't know what's wrong with my last answer. The Buddha smiled and ignored me. I think he was annoyed with me. So I was still busy spinning silk and weaving nets there, and studying Buddhism in my spare time. In the blink of an eye, another thousand years have passed.

One day, Guanyin Master passed by me, maybe because she was walking in a hurry, a drop of nectar fell from the poplar branches in her hand, and stopped right on my spider web. superior.

The destiny of nectar is to turn into rain to nourish all things in the world. My net is just a place for it to stay for a while.

It is so sparkling and dazzling, its existence only makes me feel inferior.

I ignore its existence because it will eventually disappear automatically from my life.

It has been another long thousand years, and it has never left. It just stays with me quietly, silently and breathlessly. Finally, one day, a strong wind blew past me and took it away.

After it left, I began to understand that before it came, I had nothing but loneliness, and when it left, all I had left was endless loneliness.

There are many things in life that I may not be able to have in my lifetime, but if I don’t have them, I won’t have them, and I won’t feel any regrets about them. Unfortunately, there are some things that I have had but lost in the end. . I am increasingly unable to calm down that feeling called loneliness. Although I keep myself very busy every day, loneliness is like poison, running through my body and bones, making me tortured.

The Buddha was finally alarmed. The Buddha said: "Zhu'er, this is your destined fate. Go, you will have another scene in the world of mortals."

I fell into a deep sleep, and I don't know how long it took. There were noisy sounds nearby, and someone was hitting me. I couldn't help the pain and opened my mouth. I had sounds and tears that I didn't have when I was a spider. What rang in my ears was my cry, loud and sweet. In this way, I became Lin Zhu'er, Taishi Lin's little daughter.

Yes, it was the loneliness that I couldn't compete with that pushed me down to this world of mortals. Maybe I will get back some of the things I want, or maybe I will be doomed, who knows?

I think Buddha favors me, otherwise he would not let me still retain the memory of being a spider. I want to find my nectar, the nectar that has silently protected me for a thousand years. I want him to stay with me forever and kill all the loneliness and loneliness in my heart.

My father was the Grand Master of the imperial court, and he and the late Emperor were brothers-in-law, which meant that my mother and the Queen Mother were biological sisters.

My brother and sister are also wealthy. Our family has two princes-in-law and three princesses. The Buddha cares about me. He allowed me to be born in this family, and he allowed me to be loved by everyone in this family. I have reached the age of sixteen, and I am eager to find the nectar. I am afraid that I will miss it unknowingly like last time.

Fate finally brought me and Manlu together. On the occasion of the Queen Mother's fiftieth birthday, I was allowed to attend the royal birthday banquet with my mother. This party was much bigger than I imagined.

Because it was the Queen Mother's birthday, not only the royal family, but also the family members of all the first-rank officials came.

The emperor also invited the new top scholar to come and recite poems and compose poems.

I think my appearance shocked everyone present, and many people’s eyes were focused on me, which made me feel scared. Yes, I think I am beautiful, but this beauty is only shown for the sake of nectar. My eyes are searching among the crowd, I want to find the nectar. The rules in my family are very strict. I can hardly leave the house, so I have to seize the opportunity.

My eyes were finally attracted by a pair of bright eyes. Yes, that's right, it was him. I could hardly breathe. When the brightness that made me unable to live peacefully in Leiyin Temple appeared in front of me again, it was him, the number one scholar in the new science - Manna, even the name Not changed. He was busy non-stop, busy writing poems for the Queen Mother. There were many women around him. They were all the daughters of princes and princes, and their eyes showed their yearning for him. I am not jealous, I am willing to let my lover become the object of pursuit. I am confident that only I am his destined wife in this life.

I was so good, I sat there and just stared at him quietly, and he also noticed me. His eyes told me that my presence had deeply shocked him.

When our eyes met, he smiled at me, and then he went back to writing poetry. The father-in-law presented the poems he wrote to the emperor and the queen mother one by one. After they criticized them, they asked the palace maids to sing them according to the tunes.

I heard a song: Why did Fairy Fairy leave Yaotai, wandering in three steps. Just because the Queen Mother on earth is long-lived, the heaven and earth are dancing.

I know, it must be written for me. I was immersed in the dream I was weaving, and Chai, the Queen Mother's chambermaid, came to me and took me to see the Queen Mother.

I haven’t seen the Queen Mother since I was a child. She seemed to have a good impression of me. She caressed my hand lovingly and kept smiling with her eyes narrowed. She also introduced her youngest son, Prince Xiang, to me. Xiang and I were born on the same day, same year, same month, and Xiang kept peeking at me. He was so shy and not good at expressing himself, even though he was the little prince and was favored by the superiors in the palace. Love from above and below.

I don’t remember when the banquet ended. All I know is that I drank a lot and was a little drunk. I am so happy because I have found him - Nectar. He is my happiness and life in this life. My sixteen years of life are not meaningful until the day I see him.

I told my parents my feelings for Nectar without any secret. As I wished, they didn't object. My parents loved me, and they couldn't bear to see me suffer even a little bit of injustice. As long as what I wanted to do wasn't too ridiculous, they would always agree.

The second time I met Manna was at the White Horse Temple on the outskirts of Beijing. My mother accompanied me to beg for a good marriage.

As soon as we entered the temple, the abbot told us that Gan Zhuangyuan was accompanying his wife to offer incense and invited us to meet him. Mother chatted with Mrs. Gan, and they left him and me. I knew that my mother must have wanted to tell Mrs. Gan about what happened between me and him.

There were bursts of joy mixed with a bit of inexplicable excitement and shyness in my heart. He accompanied me around the temple, followed by a large group of servants.

He was so close that I almost suffocated. He was so polite and always addressed himself as "Miss". I was a little annoyed and said to him, "Call me Zhu'er! Spider's Spider, can I call you Brother Ganlu?" He asked, "Isn't that inappropriate?" I said He smiled and said, "Didn't you always call me this before?" He was confused by me.

"You used to call me this in your heart. At that time, I was a spider spinning a web under the eaves of Leiyin Temple, and you accidentally dropped it on the branches and leaves of Guanyin Master Yang on the spider web. "Nectar, you have been with me for a whole thousand years. Then you left with a gust of wind, and I began to feel lonely. Loneliness made me fall into the world of mortals. The interruption of my practice also made me meet you again."

I just want him to retrieve the memory of making nectar, so that I can listen to him tell me personally how he felt about being with me for a thousand years.

His performance disappointed me. He was smiling, as if he were an older brother listening to his little sister's murmurs in her dream. I heard a "bump", which was the sound of my heart breaking. Did he not remember me anymore? Or does Nectar have no heart at all? I prayed to God in my heart.

"Your thoughts are too romantic. With such talent, you must write good poems."

I began to despair. What went wrong? I entered the mortal world to retrieve my nectar, and the person in front of me was clearly nectar, but he had no memory of nectar.

He seemed to be deliberately teasing me, jokingly saying: "You said you used to be a spider, but you are so beautiful, don't you look like it at all? You are thousands of times prettier than it." ."

This was meant as a compliment, but it made me feel pain when I heard it. I began to accept my fate. I was so stupid. Manna's destiny was to benefit the common people. My net was not his true destination.

I slowly left him and said with despairing sadness: "It spins out love threads day by day, weaves love webs every night, and finally falls deeply into it, unable to extricate itself.

But you men I thought it was ugly and made fun of it, thinking that it was just infatuated. "Oh nectar!" honeydew! You didn't mean it after all, I think.

I finally reached the end of the corridor. I drew one and signed it, which was a great irony for me. The abbot personally interpreted the lot for me and said that I would be happy with Hong Luan within three months. He also said that the wedding should be in the spring of the next year. My mother was still happy, but I had realized that there would be no more joy.

Three months later, people came to the palace. The whole family set up the incense table and knelt down to listen to the imperial edict. The long, elegant and obscure wording only expresses one content: The Queen Mother has promised me to her youngest son, Prince Xiang, to get married next spring. At that time I was Princess Xiang. This is nothing less than a thunderbolt.

If the disappointment in the nectar is a sharp knife, piercing deeply into my heart, the Queen Mother's marriage is like a handful sprinkled on my wound. Arsenic, how can I bear it?

There may be only one outcome waiting for me - death from serious injuries or poisoning. I was in a daze, and the little maid held me up. I was covered in cold sweat and was about to collapse.

I could only hear the vague voice of my father, who wanted to persuade his father-in-law to stay for dinner. The father-in-law smiled and refused: "Master, you are too polite. I have to go to Gan Zhuangyuan to declare the decree! By the way, you don't know yet! Prince Luo's little princess Changfeng The young lady has long been interested in the number one scholar. The Queen Mother said that she had to ask the number one scholar herself. Unexpectedly, the number one scholar agreed to it as soon as she met Princess Changfeng. "I will go and announce the marriage next month." I couldn't bear it anymore. Before my father-in-law could go far, I collapsed completely.

I could only vaguely hear people rushing about, shouting, and making a mess. The situation was just like when I was born. I think I'm leaving soon, going back to Leiyin Temple.

The manna finally followed Changfeng and left. I can no longer find any reason to continue living in this world. Let's go! Stop obsessing over it, what doesn’t belong to me doesn’t belong to me after all!

I said to myself that I started to dream, and the Buddha said to me in the dream: "Silly spider, why do you have to worry about the nectar? The nectar stays with you for a thousand years, because it has to wait. Changfeng, it can only travel around the world and moisten the world with Changfeng, and its existence is meaningful to you."

I prayed to the Buddha: "I know I was wrong. , I don’t want to stay here anymore, please lead me back!”

Fo thought for a while and said, “If you insist on coming back, I won’t force you. Your mortal relationship is not over yet. Forget it, I will give you three days, and I will come to ferry you after three days." The woodcutter drum beat three times, and I woke up. To my surprise, Xiang was smiling at me. The shy smile could not hide the exhaustion on his face.

He only said softly: "I'm sorry, I should have told you about the marriage as soon as possible."

His smile made me feel distressed, and I apologized to him silently in my heart. I couldn't She became his princess.

When the girls saw that I was awake, they hurriedly said: "Miss, you scared King Xiang and all of us. Do you know that because of you, King Xiang stayed with you for a whole day without eating or drinking? Three days and three nights. Miss, get well soon!" He started crying. I feel a little reluctant to leave. All the people here will definitely be sad if they leave.

And my parents who gave birth to me, how sad would it be for them to give birth to a child with white hair and a child with black hair?

However, I no longer have the courage to live in this world. My life is for nectar. Now that there is no nectar, I don’t even want to live.

Xiang seemed to have seen through my thoughts and said: "Forget the nectar, okay? Let me give you the happiness of this life on his behalf!"

Do you know? Spider! I have been waiting for you for three thousand years. I already recognized you at the Queen Mother's birthday banquet. You were so smart and steady, just like your peerless demeanor under the eaves of Leiyin Gallery. I am just a piece of grass under the thunder bodhi tree that has been waiting for you for three thousand years.

I look up to you every day, wanting you to see my existence, but you are so high above me and have never noticed that insignificant me, but I will not give up. One day you will know that there is such a thing. A little me is waiting for you silently. But there is only nectar in your heart from beginning to end.

The nectar was finally carried away by the wind, but you still couldn't let it go, so the Buddha asked you to come to the mortal world. I begged the Buddha to let me walk with you, and the Buddha agreed.

The Buddha said that we are destined, so I believed it. It was not easy for the nectar to come out of your life. It was not easy for me to convince the queen mother to let the emperor issue the decree, but you still couldn't let go of the nectar. ..." He couldn't go on.

I began to feel shocked. After three thousand years of waiting, I never gave him any promise, but he never complained at all.

"Zhu'er, please don't betray my love for you. Why don't you stay with me day and night?" ”

He held my hand, and my heart was shaking. I originally thought that my heart was dead.

Three days came quickly, and I I should have followed the Buddha's instructions and separated my soul from my body without hesitation. But my ears clearly heard a sad cry.

"Zhu'er, you still don't want to be with me." Am I together? It doesn't matter, I just ask you not to leave. I don’t have to marry you, as long as you live well, be happy, and let me see you every day.

Don’t leave, okay? "I hesitated for some reason, as if I was moved by something. He held my body and cried until his heart broke. Even a man of stone can cry.

My parents were still comforting me while crying. Then he seemed to have thought of something, drew his sword, and murmured to himself: "Okay! Zhu'er, since you insist on returning to Leiyin, I will follow you. No matter where your soul goes, whether it is up to the blue sky, to the underworld, or to the ends of the world, I will definitely accompany you. "After saying that, he raised his sword to kill himself.

The Buddha said: "O spider! Xiang Ke has been waiting for you for three thousand years, you can't let him go, right? Go back! While you're still not too far gone. With you like this, even if I send you back to Leiyin, it will be in vain after all. "

My soul entered my body again.

I just moved my lips slightly: "Xiang, no, I'm back. I am willing to be your princess, your princess for life, to repay your three thousand years of waiting, okay? ”

Just listen to “when” the sword in his hand fell to the ground. He hugged me tightly, we hugged each other and cried, and my parents. Yes, if I knew that I would leave I will not let those who love me so much want to leave so willfully.

I finally understand that what we have lost and what we cannot get are not valuable. What is held tightly in the palm of my hand is the most precious.

I once asked for nectar but could not get it, but now I understand that nectar is precious to Princess Changfeng. Having been with me for a thousand years is enough. What I should cherish now is the love given to me by Xiang!

The people who love me and the people I love are an eternal theme: we are today. How to choose?

I think the most painful thing in the world is: he is by my side but I don’t know that he loves me, but how much love can be repeated? Come on!

Cherish every love given to you! You must understand that what is in your hands is happiness.

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