The people on the dock are all playing hardball. Craftsmen rely on their hands, and they must have unique skills. There are unique skills, eating meat, lighting up, standing in the middle of the street; The incompetent, vegetarian, wilting, stay aside. This set is not made by anyone, it is a living method on the dock. Those who come to sing big plays pay attention to breaking into Tianjin pier. Tianjin people are fascinated by opera and understand it, with sharp eyes and sharp ears, and clear praise and criticism. The play was well sung, and the audience applauded. Like seeing the emperor, many famous actors played Tianjin to sing red and purple. But if it's normal, there will be no place to go, and the singing will be ruined. The bottom is sure to boo and boo, and the tea bowl cradle will not be able to get up; Tea leaves are covered with costumes and beards. There is no place like Tianjin to watch a play. Don't say it's not good, and you'll train many capable people. In all walks of life, there are several living immortals who are skilled in staying in heaven. Brick carving Liu, clay figurine Zhang, kite Wei, machine king, brush Li and so on. Tianjin people like to associate the surnames of such people with the businesses they are good at. The name is long, but no one knows it. This is the only nickname, which is loud and loud on the dock. < br>

Brush plum is the master of a construction factory in Hebei Avenue. Do only one line of painting and do nothing else. If he paints a room for you, don't leave it in the room. Sitting alone will be as beautiful as ascension. The most amazing thing is that when he brushes the pulp, he will wear a black suit, and when he finishes his work, he will never have a white spot on his body. Don't believe it! He also made a rule for himself that as long as there are white spots on his body, white brushes don't cost money. If he didn't have this skill, wouldn't he have been hungry? < br>

but this is a legend. People don't believe everything. Those who have never seen it before don't believe it, and those who are angry in the industry don't believe it. < br>

One day in a year, Brush Li accepted an apprentice named Cao Xiaosan. The beginning of being an apprentice is to serve tea, light cigarettes and carry things behind your ass. Cao Xiaosan, of course, has long heard of the master's unique skill, and has always been dubious. This time, he has to see it with his own eyes. < br>

that day, I went out to work with my master for the first time, and went to the South Road of the British Concession Town to paint the newly-built villa of Li Shanren. When I got there, Brush Li talked with the person in charge, only to know that the master was full of style. According to his rules, only one room is painted a day. This building has nine rooms in size, and it will take nine days to paint. Before going to work, he unpacked a small square bag that he carried with him. Sure enough, he was dressed in black pants and a pair of black shoes. Put on this black, and you will compete with a bucket of white pulp on the ground. < br>

a room with a roof and four walls, the roof should be painted first and then the walls should be painted. The top is especially difficult to brush. Who can't drop a drop when a board brush dipped in sparse powder slurry goes up at one stroke? If you drop it, it will definitely fall on you. You can brush your brush at one stroke, but you won't dip it in the slurry. But when the brush crossed the roof, it was even and solid, white, bright and refreshing. Some people say that this arm dipped in pulp swings leisurely and leisurely, and the competition is accompanied by drums and the sound of the piano. Every time the brush is brushed, the long brush with pulp pops on the wall, which is very pleasant to listen to. In the crackling sound, the walls are connected seamlessly, and brushing the past walls is really like opening a white barrier. However, Cao Xiaosan is most concerned about whether there is any white spot on Brush Li. < br>

There is another rule for Brush Li to work. After painting a wall, he must sit on a stool for a while, smoke a bag of cigarettes, drink a bowl of tea, and then paint the next wall. At the moment, Cao Xiaosan took the opportunity to pour water and light a cigarette for the master, and carefully searched the whole body of Brush Li with his eyes. After painting every wall, he searched it again, but he didn't even find a sesame-sized powder spot. He really feels that this black dress has a sacred majesty. < br>

However, when Brush Li finished painting the last wall and sat down, when Cao Xiaosan lit his cigarette, he saw a white spot on his pants, the size of a soybean. Black in white is more striking than white in black. It's over! Master revealed that he was not a fairy, and the mountain-like image in the past legends collapsed. However, he was afraid of the embarrassment of Master, so he didn't dare to talk about it or look at it, but he couldn't stop glancing at it. < br>

At this moment, Brush Li suddenly spoke to him: "Little Three, did you see the white spots on my pants?". You think the master's ability is fake and his reputation is deceptive, right? Silly boy, take a closer look-"

With this, Brush Li gently lifted his pants with his fingers, and the white spot disappeared immediately. Once he let go, the white spot appeared again. What a surprise! He put his face together and looked at it again. The white spot turned out to be a small hole! I accidentally burned it while smoking just now. The white panties inside are exposed through a small hole, which looks exactly like the white dots falling from the starch paste!

dead bird

Tianjin Wei's people are so playful that many people have nicknames. Some people's nicknames are called to their faces, while others' nicknames can only be said behind their backs, depending on how the nicknames come from. Where there is a nickname, there must be a funny story; But stories are different from stories. Some stories can be told as jokes, while others can't be told indiscriminately. For example, He Daotai, a colorful nickname, is a dead bird. < br>

He Daotai looks ordinary, and he is a piglet. But a wise head makes a close mouth, but you can hide it in secret. He has two abilities, one is to serve the boss, and the other is to serve the birds. < br>

it's quite a special achievement to serve your boss. Follow the boss's ass all day, and you can't follow it slowly or closely. If you follow too slowly, you can't get up when something happens, which makes your boss anxious; If you follow too closely, you may not step on your boss's heel, but you will annoy him. Besides, it's not enough to just race a puppy behind like that. You have to be good at reading words and feelings, and know your boss's temper, knowing when to say it and when not to say it; Obey when instructed, and nod when scolded. The boss's swearing is not allowed to be your fault, sometimes it's just the boss's outbursts and comfort. If you can't hold your temper, frown and pout, and show your troubles, ask your boss to remember. Since then, the immortal is not getting bigger, but getting smaller-this kind of thing is not done by people, but He Daotai is handy and does it calmly and naturally. People say that He Daotai's abilities come from his nature, and that he is born to be a boss's angry basket, a donkey, and he can't kick a fart with three feet, right? < br>

after that, he serves the boss, and then he serves the birds. < br>

serving birds is another achievement. Don't think that if you put the bird in a cage, put some rice, give some worms and add some water, you can jump and jump. A bird has a habit of closing its eyes and fluttering its wings. A bird has a bird's temper. If you don't follow it, you won't sing, scream or move, and you'll die alive. People say that it must be a bird in the whole life on the stage of He Daotai. He knows all about birds, no matter birds. With his chubby hands, his hair is bright and alive, and his voice is better than that of the singer in Tianfu Tea Garden. < br>

During the Spring Festival in long summer, Mr. Lin, who works in Changguan, came back from his hometown in Changzhou, Jiangsu, and brought him a myna. This starling has a round belly, thick legs and hard claws, black body and golden mouth; Cried, standing in the street can also hear clearly. He Daotai said with joy in his heart, "The cock's voice is not as loud as it is." < br>

Mr. Lin said with a smile, "Even an economist can hardly speak. It's always hard to learn. I can't teach anything, but sometimes I learn from him if I'm not careful. However, once I am in your hands, I will be sure to have a good future. " < br>

He Daotai also smiled. He said, "In three months, I'll make it speak Allegro." < br>

However, this starling is like a fierce horse, which is extremely difficult to tame for a while. He Daotai tried his best, but he couldn't learn. He Daotai scolded it: "Stupid bird." The next day it called "stupid bird" for a day. Tell it to stop. It won't stop. I can hear clearly in the front yard and backyard, and I can't sleep in the afternoon. He Daotai covered the cage tightly with a cover for more than half a day, and it didn't bark. In the evening, my wife was afraid to suffocate it and told the maid to take off the cover. As soon as it appeared, she said to her wife, "Is it rash?" The wife got a fright. On second thought, isn't this what the master said to her the other day? I accidentally learned it. Make the wife giggle for a long time. When He Daotai came back, he told his master. Before she could ask myna to say it again, myna herself said, "Madam, it's prickly heat!" < br>

He Daotai grinned and said, "This thing even imitates my voice." < br>

The wife said, "I didn't expect this bad thing to be so clever." < br>

Since then, He Daotai has taken extra care of it. After a long time, it did learn a few words such as "greet the adults", "please take a seat" and "go away", but it's hard to say. However, it popped up a few words of "prickly heat" that the old lady usually said, but it made the guests laugh, laughing their heads off. < br>

The magistrate said, "He's adult, you know how smart you are from it." < br>

He Daotai is more proud of himself than the bird. Let's press this for the time being. < br>

On the ninth day of September, the Jade Emperor Pavilion outside Dongcheng "saved nine days". As usual, people in Jinmen all went to the pavilion, commonly known as "Ascending the Mountain in September". At this time, the sky is crisp, and when I look up, my heart is comfortable and there are no blocks. On this day, Yulu, the governor of Zhili, also came to the Jade Emperor Pavilion. He was in a good mood and climbed down the narrow and steep stairs to the top of Qingxu Pavilion. All the civil and military officials who accompanied him ran before and after to cheer him up. He Daotai is naturally among them. He pointed to the sails on the mouth of Sancha River, and said something interesting, which made Lord Yulu's heart bloom. Coming down from the cabinet, He Daotai said that his home is not far away, and I hope your honor will come and visit him. Lord Yu will never condescend to visit his subordinates' homes on weekdays. But today, I was in high spirits and agreed. He Daotai's sedan chair cleared the way in front, and the other officials followed around and rode the dragon and tiger. < br>

The starling cage of Hedaotai is hung in front of the living room window. As soon as Lord Yu enters the door, it calls, "Greet the Lord." The voice is loud and clear, and it has been sent to Yulu's ear. < br>

Lord Yu became more and more cheerful and said, "This thing is even more clever than people." < br>

He Daotai answered and said, "It's because the adults have come. How to call it at ordinary times, it won't say. " < br>

when the tea was served, myna suddenly called again, "This tea is the tea before tomorrow." < br>

Lord Yu was stunned and turned to the starling in the cage and said, "This is your fault. What time is it now? How can there be tea before tomorrow? " < br>

the boss teased, and the subordinates laughed. Laughter filled the living room, and they all laughed at myna as a fool. < br>

He Daotai said, "Your Excellency really hit the nail on the head. In fact, I didn't teach this. This thing always pops up from time to time. I don't know where it came from. " < br>

The magistrate said with a smile, "It's not that the speaker doesn't mean it on weekdays, but the listener does. Presumably, Lord He always drinks good tea, and he remembers all the tea names! " < br>

Yulu said with a smile, "If you have any good tea, please invite Yulu to try it." < br>

everyone laughed again. But myna heard the word "Yulu", and suddenly her wings shook, and she rose up with all her black hair. She was so angry that she cried loudly and brightly, "Yulu that bastard!" < br>

all the people in the hall were stunned. In fact, everyone heard this sentence, and at the moment of shock, the starling said again: "Yulu that bastard!" " Speak clearly and simply. Yulu suddenly shook his hand, pulled all the tea bowls on the table on the ground and shouted angrily, "How presumptuous!" " < br>

He Daotai hurriedly fell on the ground, his voice shaking so fast that he couldn't hear him: "I didn't teach him this-".At this point, he felt stuck. It occurred to him that starling's words were exactly what he often said when he came back from Yulu where he was discouraged. Why did you remember it? Isn't this killing him? He is full of chill. < br>

By the time he understood, Yulu and all the officials had left. He was alone on the living room floor, when he suddenly jumped up and rushed at the starling, yelling, "You ruined me! I tore you, you dead bird! " < br>

He grabbed the cage with both hands and pulled it with too much force. The cage was torn apart, and the bird flew out, but he didn't catch one. The starling flew out of the window and landed in the tree. Actually learned what He Daotai just said and shouted at him, "Dead bird!" < br>

He Daotai told the servants to hit with poles, chop with bricks and climb up the tree to catch them. Myna jumped back and forth on the top of the tree for a while, and kept calling, "Dead bird! Dead bird! Dead bird! " Finally, I waved my wings and flew away, and soon disappeared. < br>

Since then, He Daotai has been nicknamed "Dead Bird". And when people pass on this nickname, it is always accompanied by this story. < br>

Blue Eye

There are two natural enemies in the antique shop, that is, those who make fake paintings and those who look at fake paintings. Those who make fake paintings try their best to deceive those sharp and tricky eyes who look at fake paintings; Those who look at fake paintings, however, see through the secrets and tricks with these eyes, hold the tip of the tail that the counterfeiter didn't hide, pull it out of a pile of paintings and hang it in broad daylight. < br>

The person who looks at the fake painting is called Blue Eye. I work in Yuchenggong Antique Shop in Guodian Street, specializing in painting. Blue eye is not blue, his surname is Jiang, and his original name is Zaitang. Blue eye is his nickname. Tianjin people have a good nickname, one for calling and the other for remembering. These blue eyes come from his myopia glasses. The lenses are thick and blue, which really match a pair of blue eyes. And the key to this blue eye is still in his eye. It is said that he can see the truth when he turns off the lights and looks at the picture; Although the words are a bit mysterious, they are not adulterated. His blue eyes are really magical when painting-looking at fake paintings, his eyes are dull; Look at the real painting, a blue light. < br>

On this day, a student dressed up came to the shop with a scroll in his hand. On the outside, the inscription reads "Spring Color Map of Dadizi Lake". Blue eyes seem to have missed it. He knows that no matter what is written on this inscription, it doesn't count, and it depends on the painting. He brushed the floor and pulled it like lightning, revealing a half-foot painting heart. This is Blue Eye's famous "half-foot job". He only looks at paintings by half a foot, regardless of their size. Is it true?