Why is eye contact important?

Why is eye contact important? It is often said that the eyes are the windows to the soul. When we are communicating with others or when communicating, we need to communicate through our eyes. Facial expressions, tone of voice, eyes, etc. all give the other party different feelings. The following is about why eye contact is important. Why Eye Contact Is Important 1

Eye contact is the expressive non-verbal communication between people. Idioms such as "eyebrows conveying affection" and "secret glances" vividly illustrate the important role of eyes in people's emotional communication. The non-verbal messages sent by the eyes are often very subtle. One important aspect of eye messages is eye contact.

In American culture, meeting other people's eyes signals honesty, reliability, and warmth and involvement. In many cultures, talking without eye contact is considered rude, indicates a lack of interest, a lack of attention, or reveals shyness or deception.

Just a pair of eyes reveals a lot of information, "evil eyes", "drowsy eyes", "sad eyes", "penetrating eyes". You look "eye to eye" when you agree with the other person; you look "dismissive" when you think someone should be sentenced to death for murder or some other reason. When you consider the role of eye messages, you quickly realize how important they are.

Although these non-verbal signals conveyed by the eyes receive less attention, there is a famous saying in Africa that "the eyes are a means of aggression," and many Asia-Pacific islanders agree. In most African countries and other parts of the world, if a person has a higher status than you, you are not supposed to look him or her in the eye.

Eyes are the windows to the soul. Your inner emotions can be conveyed through your eyes, and the information conveyed by your eyes will affect the effectiveness of communication. Ron Clark, an outstanding teacher in the United States, said in the book "Excellence is Taught": "Use your eyes to communicate with others. When someone speaks to you, look at him; when someone expresses an opinion, your body and face Look directly at them. This can be difficult for some people.

However, if you are trying to win people over and want to show that what you are saying is important. It's important to be serious. For example, when you walk into your boss's office and ask for a promotion, he will consider you more seriously if you keep your eyes on him instead of keeping your head down. Request.

When you present your business plan at work, if you look at the people around you with confidence, then everyone will trust you more and recognize your plan..." Confidence The kind eyes make people trust you, and the sincere eyes make people like you.

In daily life, people often worry about not knowing how to make correct eye contact with others when talking to them. Elisabeth Donao, an interpersonal communication expert in Freiburg, Germany, pointed out the correct way of eye contact, saying: "During a conversation, eye contact with the other party is inevitable.

The correct way of eye contact It helps the conversation go smoothly, but how to do it? Staring into the other person's eyes during a conversation is not the right thing to do. Doing so can make the other person feel uncomfortable and provoked.

The correct approach is to first look at the other person's eyes, then slowly move your gaze to the mouth, and then return to the eyes after a while. This will give the other person the opportunity to respond appropriately to what you say, nodding, and speaking. Smiling and other favorable expressions will come out naturally, and will also make the other person feel comfortable talking to you."

In addition, Donao emphasized: "Don't turn your eyes to the ground when talking. Or the ceiling, and do not stop looking at any part of the other person's body. These are rude to the other person. ”

Therefore, during the communication process between two people, the listener should be attentive to the other person. Look at the other person when speaking to express concern; when you become the speaker and express your opinions, it is not appropriate to meet the other person's eyes, unless the relationship between the two is so close that they can directly "communicate with their eyes."

When you finish saying the last sentence, you should move your eyes to the other person's eyes. This is a kind of asking "Do you think what I said is right?" or hinting to the other person "It's your turn now." It’s your turn to speak.” This point has been reflected and verified in the diplomatic meetings between national leaders. This is the skill of using eyes in dialogue and communication.

Of course, in the process of communication or sales, the gazes between people also vary depending on the person's status and self-confidence. In an experiment, a salesperson asked two female college students who did not know each other to discuss a problem together. In advance, the sales expert told one of them that the person she was talking to was a graduate student, and at the same time told the other person that the person she was talking to was a middle school student who had failed the college entrance examination many times.

Observation results show that female students who think they have a high status look confidently at each other while listening and speaking, while female students who think they have a low status rarely look at each other when speaking.

It can be observed in daily life that the active person often looks at the other person more, while the passive person meets the other person's gaze less.

Eyes during communication are an important part of the conversation. If your eyes are wandering, no matter how careful your wording is, it will leave the impression of being unconfident or insincere. Mr. Wu Jianmin, the former Chinese Ambassador to France and current President of the China Foreign Affairs University, mentioned a small example of eye contact.

Once he went to visit a congressman from a certain country. After the meeting, the congressman said: "We can become good friends. Because by looking at your eyes, I know you are very sincere." Sometimes. , one look is worth many words.

It is for this reason that Clark said: "I spend a long time training my students to use their eyes to communicate with people. In order to give them more opportunities to practice, I give them every two Divide the individuals into groups and tell them that when you speak, you should look at each other with your eyes and add more emphasis and emotion to your tone.

If you do this at this time. If your eyes are looking away or staring at the floor, that means you are not sure about what you are saying, or what you are saying may not be true at all. I also told them that I have heard that if your eyes keep looking up and to the left 91. If it means you are lying.

I often train them to talk to each other in groups, so that they gradually realize that looking at each other with their eyes is very effective. "Clark's training method is not only applicable. In communication between students, for those who do not know how to use eyes to improve their confidence, this is indeed a method worth trying and learning.

Eye contact and eye contact have another meaning in communication. Everyone should have had such an experience. We should all still remember the situation when we were in school. As long as we stared at the teacher, we couldn't focus at all.

However, if we stare at the back of the head of the classmate in front of us or our own pencil, it is easy to get distracted, but as long as we look at the teacher, we can come back to our senses immediately. This is the meaning of eye contact. It can make you pay more attention to what the other person is saying, which is not only conducive to communication, but also respects others. Otherwise, during the communication process, you may not know what the other party said because you have already deserted.

On the other hand, when the other party does not focus on this during the communication process, we can use some special techniques to attract the other party's attention and force the other party to look at you. In this way, you can let the other party follow your train of thought.

Learn to use eyes to communicate. In this way, I can understand their thoughts more clearly and deeply, and they don’t have to worry about the consequences if they say the wrong thing, because the eyes are the source of communication. There is no sound, but it is a true and direct way of expression.

It is precisely because of this that we came to the conclusion: "No matter how we communicate with the people around us, and no matter what the content of our expression is, we will definitely respond to those who look at us with their eyes. The person communicating pays more attention and responds. “The eyes constitute the communication. Why eye contact is important 2

When someone is speaking, look at him or her, not hard, but constantly so that your interlocutor will understand that you are not distracting. This is also a silent power that makes people feel respected.

This reflects the importance of eye contact in conversation. Conveying emotions through eyes is a common psychological phenomenon. People's complex emotions towards everything around them will naturally pass through joy, anger, sorrow, joy and sorrow. The look conveys it. Look into your eyes and I'll know your secret. This may be an exaggeration, but when speaking, it is indeed easier to judge whether the other person is telling the truth by looking at the other person's eyes.

For parts such as the nose, what you see is often the processed expression of the other person, rather than the most direct reflected expression.

If you want to establish a good tacit understanding with others, you should spend 70% of the time looking at the other person. The part you look at is the triangle area between the eyes and the mouth. The information in this area will be conveyed correctly. understand effectively. If you want to be successful in communication, especially in communication with strangers, you should look at the other person's speech with expectant eyes, neither humble nor overbearing, only a shallow smile and occasional eye contact are commonly used, gentle and effective way.

In interpersonal communication, eye contact also plays an important role in transmitting information. Different gazes reflect different psychology and produce different effects. The eyes are the windows to the soul. Even a fleeting glance can reflect a surprising amount of information, express rich emotions, and even reveal the deepest secrets in the heart." The ancient Roman poet Ovit said: " In the silent eyes, there are often voices and words. ”

In practice, it is very valuable to use your eyes skillfully. If you want to leave a deep impression on the other person, you should stare at him for a longer time to show confidence. If you want to make a deeper impression on the other person, If you win an argument with your opponent, never look away to show your determination.

If you don’t know why someone is looking at you, you have to pay a little attention to his facial expressions and eyes in order to find countermeasures. If you meet someone and feel uncomfortable, look away to reduce the discomfort. If you are talking to someone and he or she is inattentive or keeps closing his eyes, you need to stop. Why eye contact is important 3

The importance of eye contact during speeches

The importance of eye contact during speeches: Many factors can make public speaking more effective. They can interact with the audience, express themselves clearly in a professional tone, and even have the same charisma as Jobs and Richard. What doesn’t change is eye contact. Almost all of the best speakers use eye contact for whatever reason, so let’s take a look.

1. Eye contact can help you concentrate

There are many kinds of pictures after your eyes look at the entire room. All those colors and shapes slow down the mind because you're trying to pay attention to what you're saying as well as what your eyes are seeing. Making eye contact from time to time will make your brain focus only on what you are saying.

2. Help others focus

Making eye contact with others is also a good way to get others to pay attention to you. Today’s smartphones, pre-wired Wi-Fi for computers, and other distractions can make it easy to lose focus. You can change this by making eye contact. If you look at them, they will look at you. This approach works especially well for those small groups. This is a very simple truth. If you look at them, they will look at you, and if you don't look at them, they probably won't look at you either.

3. It will make you look more professional

After reading an example, this is easy to understand. Police officers and those who are parents know this. If your child doesn't look you in the face when he says something to you, he might be lying or being shy. The same can be said for public speeches. If you cannot make eye contact with your audience, the audience will subconsciously lose confidence in your speech. This is why tech companies choose to have charismatic people give presentations.

4. Continuous eye contact will increase your confidence

In movies, you will see similar situations. The man and woman stare at each other for 30 seconds, then they can't help but kiss each other. We're not talking about those people coming up to you and kissing you, because that would be unreasonable. But when you make eye contact with someone, you become more confident.

5. Engage your audience gradually

When your audience notices that you are looking at them, encourage them to respond to you with some body language. If you're talking to someone, or if you see someone frowning, you realize you've made a mistake. This will also give you some opportunities to adapt. Watch them, see their facial expressions, and slowly adapt your speech to interact with your audience.

Eye contact skills in speech

Friends, during speech training, eye communication training will definitely be involved. Speech experts give the following advice: The eyes must communicate with the audience, but they do not necessarily have to look at each other all the time. Whether it is a speech, an interview or daily communication. Many people like to look down at the ground,

or treat the audience below as wooden stakes. These are very bad methods.

When giving a speech, you must maintain communication with the audience through your eyes. There are three ways of making eye contact: false gaze, staring, and looking around.

Looking around means looking from left to right, from front to back, taking care of the entire venue. At the beginning of your speech, it is better not to rush into speaking, but to pause and look around with a smile. Using this method can make the whole audience feel close to each other.

However, it must be noted that the overall situation must be taken into consideration and the audience in any corner cannot be ignored; at the same time, the head swing should not be too large and the eyes should not turn around wantonly.

False vision means looking directly at the audience in a certain area, but not actually looking at that person. This should be the most common in speeches. The sight range of the speech is on the audience, which is suitable when the audience is large.

Staring is looking at someone specifically and making eye contact. The general time is about 3 seconds, try not to exceed 5 seconds. Choose one person as your focus, and then slowly move your eyes from one to the next, lingering on each person for two to three seconds. Look directly at the audience, or at the bridge of their nose or chin.

Find the friendly-looking members of the audience and smile at them one at a time; then target the more skeptical members of the audience and smile at them gradually; if you feel nervous, imagine that the audience is wearing a bathrobe.

Use this method to express praise and gratitude to the attentive and enthusiastic audience; to guide and inspire the audience who have questions and confusion; to provide support and encouragement to the audience who want to ask; to give support and encouragement to those who affect the order of the scene. The audience stops it and makes it converge to achieve the purpose of controlling the scene.

The use of this method is more targeted, the meaning of the gaze should be clear, and at the same time, it should be limited and avoid direct contact with the audience's eyes for a long time, so as to avoid the audience being stared at becoming uncomfortable and other audience members being left out.

How to solve the problem of eye gaze during speech

In public speaking, those master speakers can interact well with the audience with just one eye look and trigger the audience to scream. For us, how do beginner speakers train their eyes to communicate with the audience?

If you want to have rich eyes, you should first improve the reaction speed of your eyes. Improving the reaction speed of your eyes can help us broaden our horizons and enable us to When certain emotional scenes change, our eyes can quickly make corresponding adjustments to better convey emotions.

Let me share with you three methods on how to train your eyes.

Training method one: Improve the reaction speed of the eyes

Every morning, stretch out your index finger and move it in the four directions of southeast, northwest, and follow the direction of the finger with your eyes and make corresponding movements. . Do it for three minutes each time. After a week of persistence, speed up the movement of your fingers, thereby increasing the speed of your eye movements and increasing the reaction ability of your eyes. If you persist, you will see results soon.

Training method two: Improve the concentration of your eyes

In life, we can use small games to improve the concentration of your eyes. You can look at each other with your friends. , keep looking into the other person’s eyes without blinking. Practice 5 groups every day and try to increase the time of each eye contact. If you can keep looking at your friend for one minute without blinking, it means that the concentration of your eyes has been greatly improved.

Of course, if you prefer to practice alone, you can also look in the mirror every day and focus your eyes on one point. Through such training, your eyes will be more focused and more "lethal". "Strength"

Training method three: Improve life experience

If you want to truly develop emotional and talking eyes, what you really need is from the opponent. Life observation, experience, observation and analysis.

In order to play a good role in the movie "The Grandmaster", the famous Hong Kong actor Chang Chen learned boxing from Wang Shiquan, the eighth generation successor of Bajiquan. After three years of hard training, he finally successfully portrayed the master of Bajiquan in the movie. The image of Yi Yin Tian. In the scene of the fight with Ip Man, Yi Yin Tian's fierce eyes are vividly and accurately displayed, leaving a deep impression on people.

How to use your eyes during a speech

First, focus. A sense of firmness and stability.

Maybe it’s because of my introverted personality and lack of confidence in my heart. There is a story about a person who is very introverted and self-isolated. He is usually afraid of looking at other people's eyes. He always looks a bit "evil" or even "vulgar". Because he was bored that night, he wandered on the street. Because he was autistic, he always walked with a hunched back, and looked at passers-by with wandering eyes. ——At first glance, he really looks like a thief.

As luck would have it, there was a policeman on duty nearby. When I saw his image, I stared at him for a while. It didn't matter what he saw. The student became unconfident. He glanced at the policeman and immediately looked away.

The more the policeman looked at him, the more he looked like someone with a problem, so he took a step toward him. As a result, the classmate became even more nervous and turned around to run away. When the police saw him, he wanted to run away, but there was no way. He immediately shouted and chased her. The student actually ran away. The two of them ran out of breath. Finally, the police caught him and asked for his ID card and work permit.

The police asked him: Why did you run away when you saw me? Tell me honestly. He said pitifully: I am a good person. Why are you chasing me like this? If you don’t chase me, I won’t run away. Everyone, this is a true story! - Unsteady eyes and lack of confidence will be a burden for your life!

Second, live and express yourself.

Some people’s eyes are bright and lively, while others’ eyes are dull and lifeless. Therefore, “eyes” are the radiance radiating from the eyes, or the look of the eyes. People may have dull eyes when they have poor vision (such as myopia), are distracted, are tired, or are in poor physical condition.

However, through exercise, the eyes can be bright and bright, giving people a radiant look. For example, Peking Opera actors have a special method of training their eyes to focus their eyes. With your eyes fixed on a target, there are two ways to fix your eyes: the upright concentration method and the oblique concentration method. Through eye-fixation training, you can definitely make your eyes brighter and brighter.