People in ancient times were very wise, and they also showed great wisdom when it came to educating children. Therefore, there are countless examples of successful education of children that have been passed down through the ages. The following is the information I shared with you about the successful cases of educating children in ancient times. I hope it can help you!
The successful cases of educating children in ancient times
Zhuge Liang teaches his children? Should we aim high?
Zhuge Liang served the country and the people throughout his life, self-denial and devotion to public service, and set an example for future generations. He taught his children to have lofty aspirations. When he was fifty-four, he wrote the famous "Book of Commandments" to his eight-year-old son Zhuge Zhan. This is not only a summary of Zhuge Liang's life experience, but also his requirements for his children: "A gentleman." During this journey, you can cultivate your character with tranquility, and cultivate your virtues with frugality. If you are not indifferent, you will not be able to clarify your ambitions, and if you are not tranquil, you will not be able to go far. Learning requires tranquility, and talent requires learning. Without learning, there is no way to expand talents, and without ambition, there is no way to achieve learning. ?Warn children that if they want to become morally cultivated people, they must first meditate, constantly cultivate themselves and reflect on themselves; they must exercise self-restraint, not indulge themselves, and cultivate noble moral character and integrity. If you don't be indifferent to fame, you can't have clear and firm ambitions; if you don't have a pure heart and a pure heart, you can't realize your lofty ideals. Realizing your ideal requires continuous learning of knowledge. Only through meditation and hard work can you learn true knowledge. Without a firm will, you cannot succeed.
Zhuge Liang had high hopes for his children. Later, his children were indifferent to fame and fortune, served the country loyally, and made contributions to the country and the country. This is the meaning and value of "Tranquility" and "Zhiyuan".
Kou’s mother teaches her son? Cultivate all people?
In the Northern Song Dynasty, Kou Zhun lost his father when he was young, and his family was poor. He relied on his mother’s weaving to survive. Kou’s mother often spun yarn late at night. Teach Kou Zhun how to read, and supervise Kou Zhun to study hard and become successful. Later, Kou Zhun went to Beijing to take the exam and won the Jinshi. The good news was conveyed to his hometown. At this time, Kou Zhun's mother was seriously ill. Before she died, she gave a painting she drew by herself to her family, Liu's mother, and said: "Kou Zhun will definitely become an official in the future. If he makes mistakes, you will do it." Give him this painting!?
Later, Kou Zhun became prime minister. To celebrate his birthday, he invited two theater troupes to prepare a banquet for his officials. Mother Liu thought the time had come, so she gave Kou Mu's painting to him. Kou Zhun unfolded it and saw that it was a picture of "Lessons in the Cold Window", with a poem written on it: "Studying in Gudeng's class is hard, I hope you can cultivate yourself for all people; the family tradition of diligence and thrift, the kindness of your mother, don't forget it when you are rich and powerful" poor. ?This was clearly his mother's legacy. Kou Zhun read it over and over again, tears welling up in his eyes. So the birthday banquet was immediately withdrawn. Since then, he has been clean and caring for the people, impartial and selfless, and has become a famous virtuous prime minister in the Song Dynasty.
Ancient methods of educating children
1. Educational methods that highlight kindness and severity
Leniency and strictness are a pair of contradictions in family education. Because parents and children Because of the blood relationship, parents are more effective and direct in educating their children than school and social education. At the same time, it is this relationship that often makes parents love their children too much, resulting in laissez-faire and doting, which in turn harms the children. This is family education. The contradiction between love and education is also a difficulty in family education. In terms of dealing with the contradiction between love and education, the educational method of combining kindness and severity was formed in ancient Chinese family education.
The tradition of combining kindness and severity in Chinese family education mainly originated from Confucianism. Confucius once put forward the view that "being a father should stop at kindness". There is a saying that "a strict father is more important than a worthy father". It can be seen that Confucianism not only emphasizes kindness, but also stresses strictness, and emphasizes "the combination of kindness and severity". Yan Zhitui clearly combined "kindness" and "sternness" and proposed that "if parents are majestic and kind, then children will be cautious and filial". He also said that "the strictness of father and son does not allow for sexual relations, and the love of flesh and blood does not allow for love." Jane, Jane means kindness and filial piety, but love means neglect.
Sima Guang further developed this aspect of thought. Regarding the contradiction between love and teaching, he advocated equal emphasis on kindness and training, and the combination of love and teaching. He said, "Being kind without training is disrespectful. Training without being kind is harmful to relatives. Kindness and training are complete, but respecting relatives is everything." That is to say, if parents only talk about kindness but not strict discipline, they will lose their righteousness as elders. If they only teach strictly but not be charitable, they will harm the principle of loving each other between flesh and blood. Only by combining kindness and strictness can we have righteousness and family affection. Complete tutoring.
When dealing with the relationship between leniency and strictness in family education, scholars in the Qing Dynasty emphasized that "teaching children should be strict", but "sternness" does not mean beating and scolding at every turn, but strict requirements. "Strictness" includes not only treating children The strictness of children also includes the strictness of parents. As a father, he must be strict with himself and lead by example. This more comprehensively elaborates on the educational idea of ??combining kindness and strictness. Therefore, the education method of combining kindness and severity has become a fine tradition in family education in my country.
2. Educational methods that focus on personal example
Since family members live together for a long time, parents play a special role in the education of their children. As Yan Zhitui said, "People always believe what they say, believe what they are close to, do what they are told, and do what they obey." That is to say, with the same word, people always believe those close to them and the same order. , people always listen to the people they admire, and the words and deeds of parents play a vital role in their children.
In the Confucian theory of self-cultivation, family order, country governance, and world peace, self-cultivation is the foundation. Therefore, Confucianism attaches great importance to the cultivation and shaping of personal personality and influencing others through personal personality. Confucius advocated: "To correct others, you must first correct yourself. If your body is upright, you will not do what you are told. If your body is not upright, you will not follow orders."
Mencius continued to develop this idea. He said, "I have never heard of anyone who can correct others by wronging himself." In family education, he even put forward the idea of ????changing children to teach. A gentleman does not teach his children. , why? Mencius said: "If the power is not upright, the teacher must be upright. If uprightness fails, anger will follow, and anger will lead to rebellion. Master, teach me to be upright. Master, if you do not come from uprightness, then This is because father and son are hostile to each other. If father and son are hostile to each other, it will be evil. That is to say, the reason why a gentleman does not teach his son is because of the situation. The teacher must use the right way. If the son refuses to obey, the father will be angry and hurt his son's feelings. When the son's feelings are hurt, he will blame his father. You want me to leave. Righteous way, but you yourself are not like this. In this way, the son will hurt the father's feelings, causing the father and son to hurt each other, and the relationship will deteriorate. This shows the importance of the father's words and deeds to the education of his children.
Yan Zhitui widely used the method of teaching by example in family education. He said: When a person is young, his expression is uncertain, what he pays is unrequited, his words, laughter and actions are not interested in learning. , subtle and natural. ?That is to say, children receive education in the family, mostly unconsciously during activities. The words and deeds of parents play a subtle role in nurturing the children. Therefore, many family mottos and family letters written by many people in ancient my country are more commonly used. It is a way of educating children based on their own personal experiences and feelings.
Since ancient Chinese family letters and family precepts are educational materials written by respected elders in the family for their children, many of their opinions are based on their own personal experiences, which invisibly serves as a role model for future generations. role model.
3. Advocating the educational method of teaching students in accordance with their aptitude
Teaching students in accordance with their aptitude is to implement education according to the different characteristics of children's personality and ability development. Confucius paid great attention to teaching students in accordance with their aptitude. According to the "Advanced Analects of Confucius", Confucius's student Ran Qiu was timid and timid, while Zhong You was bold and aggressive. Confucius adopted different educational methods for their different personalities. Encouraging him to dare to move forward, Confucius taught Zhong You to take a step back first and not to act rashly. These two students asked Confucius the same question, and Confucius gave different answers. Some disciples didn't understand why. Confucius said: "To seek is to retreat, so to advance, because it is also to attract people, so to retreat." ?
The method of teaching students in accordance with their aptitude is also highly praised in family education. Yuan Cai in the Song Dynasty put forward the idea that "sexuality cannot be forcibly combined". He believed that the most intimate relationship in the world is that of father, son and brother, but why still Will it cause family discord? One important reason is that you don't pay attention to each other's personality. If their natures cannot be reconciled, then their words and deeds cannot be reconciled. This is the source of the discord between father, son and brothers. Since fathers, sons and brothers have different personalities, they should not be forced to do so. Instead, they should seek common ground while reserving differences and teach students in accordance with their aptitude. Those who are fathers and brothers are sympathetic to their children, but do not blame their children for being the same as themselves. Those who are children look up to their fathers and brothers and do not expect their fathers and brothers to listen to themselves. Then they will be in harmony with each other when doing things, and there will be no danger of quarrels. Education is an individualized practical activity, because any educational activity must work through the educated themselves. In this sense, any educational activity requires self-education to be completed, and should be based on the educated person. Implement education based on the characteristics of the individual.
Famous sayings about educating children in ancient times
1. Personal appearance
You must wash your hands and rinse your mouth in the morning.
《Disciple Rules》
After getting up in the morning, you should wash your face and rinse your mouth to feel refreshed and have a good start.
The crown must be straight, the buttons must be knotted, and the socks and shoes must be tight.
《Disciple Rules》
Be careful to wear your hat correctly, button your clothes properly, wear your socks flatly, and tie your shoelaces tightly.
Wear your crown and clothes in a certain position, and don’t mess around and cause filth.
"Disciple Rules"
Clothes and hats that are carelessly taken off must be placed in a fixed place and cannot be thrown around to avoid soiling the clothes and hats.
2 Verbal Expression
Avoid harsh words, dirty words, and market mentality.
"Disciple Rules"
Be careful not to speak vulgar words, and do not be contaminated by cunning language, obscene and dirty words, and the vulgar tone of street gangsters.
Be patient with your words and let go of your anger.
"Disciple Rules"
If you can hold back your anger when speaking carelessly, unnecessary conflicts and resentments will naturally disappear.
Be loyal in words and respectful in deeds.
?"Revelation of Bailudong Academy"
Careless words are loyal and trustworthy, and actions are honest and respectful.
3 Daily Actions
Don’t be slow when your parents call you; don’t be lazy when your parents order you. Parents must listen to their teachings; parents must obey their responsibilities.
《Disciple Rules》
When my parents call me, I must agree immediately and don’t wait for a long time before agreeing. When my parents ask me to do something, I have to do it immediately without delaying or being lazy.
Everyone who makes mistakes must be reported, and those who rebel must be confronted.
"Disciple Rules"
If you are careless, you should tell your parents when you go out, and when you come back, you should inform your parents so that your parents can feel at ease.
4 Interpersonal Communication
When I sit with my husband, he will ask me what he wants, and he will answer the question in the end.
"Book of Rites"
I was with my teacher. When the teacher asked a question, I had to wait until he finished speaking before answering.
When people are not idle, don’t disturb them with things; when people are uneasy, don’t disturb them with words.
? "Disciple Rules"
What should you do when you want to trouble others? When others are busy and have no time, don't bother them because you have something to do. When others are uneasy, don't bother them just to talk to them.
Don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you. If you are unable to do something, you will seek others from yourself.
? "Revelation of Bailudong Academy"
Don't let others do what you don't want to do. If you fail to achieve your goals by doing things, you should look for the reasons from yourself.
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