Confucius also said: "If people are heartless, what is a gift? People are heartless, so what are you happy about? " (The Analects of Confucius Bashu) On the surface, the rules of rites and music are the rules of silk books and bells and drums, but Confucius clearly pointed out that its essence is people's moral cultivation, and external etiquette is just a form. If people can't do good, they will lose their souls. It can be seen that benevolence and ceremony are unified, ceremony is the external expression of benevolence, and benevolence is the essential requirement of ceremony. One of the most important reasons for the collapse of etiquette at that time. Therefore, Confucius put benevolence above ceremony and endowed it with moral connotation. In the eyes of Confucius, human nature is good, and the key to moral cultivation lies in the cultivation of the day after tomorrow. In daily life, we should follow the standard of "courtesy" to restrain ourselves, so as to achieve "benevolence" and earnestly practice the requirements of "benevolence" in order to achieve "benevolence" "Benevolence" is a kind of self-cultivation, which requires us to combine "self-denial" and "complex ceremony", starting from strict demands on ourselves, starting from small things, being generous to others, not being influenced by external conditions, and not asking others for anything. Confucius emphasized "self-denial" and specifically required himself to strictly abide by etiquette norms in four aspects: seeing, listening, speaking and moving. Only by combining "self-denial" with "courtesy" can we achieve the realm of seeking benevolence and benevolence. Source: Communication research.