“If you blame yourself with the same intention of blaming others, you will have few faults; if you forgive others with the intention of forgiving yourself, you will be all friends.” This is a sentence from Lin Bu’s "Province Heart Record" of the Tang Dynasty.
It means "If you hold yourself to the same standards as you hold others, you will have few mistakes; if you hold yourself tolerant of others, you will have many friends."
Original text Selected from ancient series such as "Songshu Ji", "Baichuan Xuehai", "Jintide Secretary" and so on. Obvious textual errors have been corrected.
The traditional culture of the Chinese nation lasts for a long time, and the historical classics are vast. The long river of history rolls by, and the great waves wash away the sand. The documents that have been deposited and preserved are pieces of gold and silver, which are particularly precious.
The instructive and admonishing documents handed down by our country's folk (private and family) directly reflect the moral ideals advocated by people at that time, and more directly and truly reflect the characteristics of Chinese culture than those grand official Confucian classics. feature.
Extended information:
Historical allusions about if you forgive yourself with a heart that forgives others, you will all be friends with others, and if you blame yourself with a heart that blames others, you will have few faults:
1. Fan Zhongxuan Gong Fan Chunren, the second son of Fan Zhongyan, a famous minister and great writer in the Northern Song Dynasty, once warned his children: Although a person is extremely stupid, he will be wise when he blames others; although he is smart, if he forgives himself, he will be stupid. Er Cao always blames himself with a mind that blames others, and forgives others with a mind of forgiving himself, so that he will not lose his status as a sage. What he is saying here is: No matter how stupid a person is, he is very good at criticizing and making demands on others.
The core of this sentence is what we usually call "be strict with yourself and be lenient to others." When you find that others have made mistakes, if you can advise and correct them with a sincere, truthful, and tolerant heart, I think the person involved will be grateful; if you find that others have problems, you can criticize, accuse, and be cruel and brutal. Trying to lecture others with attitude will definitely not produce good results.
2. Zigong asked: "Is there anything you can say that can be implemented throughout your life?" Confucius replied: "Forgive me!" It is not difficult to forgive one's own mistakes, but it is not easy to understand the situation of others. A "forgive" "", the essence is to compare one's feelings with one's own, think in others' shoes, put oneself in other people's shoes in interpersonal communication, and be less aggressive in everything and more "seeking others in return".
Even the most shrewd people seem confused when it comes to forgiving their own mistakes. As long as you always ask yourself with the same thoughts you ask of others, and forgive others with the same thoughts that forgive yourself, you don't have to worry about not reaching the realm of a sage.
Baidu Encyclopedia - Worry-Free Record