Text/Huo Hui

Luo Zhenyu said: "If a person is still good friends with his friend ten years ago, it means that this person has basically made no progress in these years."

In other words: If your friends haven’t changed in 10 years, then it’s not that you haven’t made progress, you’re simply going backwards.

Don’t always think that strong links between relatives, friends, classmates and colleagues are the best and most effective.

In this society where you have to run with all your strength to stay where you are, if you don’t make new friends, come into contact with new things, or learn new knowledge, when the time comes, the times will abandon you without even saying hello. beat.

There is a paper called "The Price of Friendship" by Harvard University. The author examined more than 3,000 venture investors and more than 10,000 projects they invested in over the past few decades.

It was found that partnering according to ability can increase the success rate of investment, while partnering with acquaintances will extremely significantly reduce the possibility of investment success.

The reason is simple. Most of your friends are at the same level as you. They know people and things, and their way of thinking and behavior are similar to yours.

When you are with them, they have similar values ??and the information they convey to each other is similar, so it is difficult for you to have new ideas and new breakthroughs.

No wonder there is a famous saying in "Chinese Partner": Never start a company in partnership with your best friend. Because friendship will make you lose more possibilities of success.

On the contrary, those weak relationships - strangers who meet a few times, people you meet on the Internet, friends of friends at dinner parties... may bring you unexpected success.

Mark Granovetter, a well-known sociologist, has studied how professionals, technicians, and managers in suburban Boston find jobs.

He found 282 people and randomly selected 100 people for face-to-face interviews.

It was found that less than half of the people applied through formal channels, such as reading advertisements and submitting resumes, and found jobs; while 45 out of 100 people found jobs through personal connections.

What is even more surprising is that most of these personal connections are "weak ties". That is to say, people who rely on introductions from relatives and friends usually cannot find jobs, but people who are casual acquaintances and not familiar with them can. Help you.

Because these weak links have different resources, when they meet each other, they will bring new information and new opportunities.

? Strong links provide resources, and weak links bring opportunities. In many cases, opportunities are more important than ability and effort, and weak links are more effective than strong links.

Speech coach He Jia once told his lucky story.

He once published an article on his official account "How to use growth hacking to sell 60,000 copies of a book."

This article happened to be seen by an employee of NetEase Cloud Classroom. He contacted He Jia, and then He Jia was invited to open an online class "Learn Speech with He Jia" in NetEase Cloud Classroom. Short More than 1,000 copies were sold in just one month.

What’s even more interesting is that because the marketing director of NetEase Cloud Classroom signed up for He Jia’s speech class, he thought it was good and invited He Jia to give a special speech to the middle and senior management of NetEase Group’s marketing department. training.

? Opportunities in life are hidden in these weak links inadvertently.

Because of weak links, I have also benefited a lot.

I like writing. I often publish short works and gradually get to know some people, including writing partners, readers, editors, and public account directors.

Because of weak links, I know a lot of things I don’t know.

My writing partner Qingyou told me: "People have dark energy; Feng Shui is also a science."

Book editor Yao Yao told me: "Educate children, No discipline is better discipline."

Reader Chunjie told me:

Last year, the Nobel Prize in Chemistry was won by three physicists, and the boundaries between science and disciplines have crossed. It’s getting blurry...

Because of writing, I also got many unexpected opportunities.

A book editor saw my short work and thought it was very consistent with the theme of her new book, so she sent me her new book and asked me to write a review.

Under the introduction of a public account founder, I met the planner of an online course, and I began to plan online courses in my professional field...

In the past year of my amateur writing, I have gained many new friends in my circle of friends. These weak links have created a large network. My circle continues to expand, and my connections are constantly being upgraded and iterated.

All of this is an experience I have never had in the workplace. It turns out that there are still so many possibilities in my life.

There was once a popular article "Different circles, no need to force integration". I have a different view.

Many opportunities in life are found in various circles, hidden among people with weak links. How can you remain indifferent?

If you are still out of reach of this circle and such people, then you should work hard to get closer to them.

Wendi Deng is a master of this, and will not let go of any opportunity.

She was originally the daughter of a factory director in Guangzhou. She married in the United States and obtained a green card; then she went from California State University to Yale University Business School; from an ordinary intern at Hong Kong Star TV to meeting a "world media tycoon" "Murdoch got married, had children, and got divorced.

The reason why her life is so cheating is because she seized the most important weak link opportunity, which was a turning point in her life.

After graduating from Yale, Wendi Deng wanted to develop in Hong Kong. On the plane flying to Hong Kong, she happened to sit next to the director of Murdoch News Corporation. At that time, the director was preparing to go to Hong Kong to serve as the director of Star TV Deputy Chief Executive Officer.

Wendi Deng seized this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Although she lacked experience in the entertainment industry, she had advantages such as an MBA degree from Yale Business School and proficiency in English, Cantonese and Mandarin. The plane had not yet arrived in Hong Kong. , she easily got a job as an intern at Star TV headquarters.

If Wendi Deng remained silent because of different circles, she would lose this job, and then lose the opportunity to get to know Murdoch, and her life path would be completely different.

Therefore, although the circles are different, you should try to integrate. Here is your opportunity to change your destiny.

Of course, if you are unable to enter a better circle or meet better people because of your insufficient abilities, then improve yourself first. When you are good enough, these people and circles will come to you. you.

The Internet has expanded our circle of friends, allowing you to meet more friends with weak links.

Your opportunities are hidden among these friends, so you must carefully build your circle of friends.

Break out of the original rules and regulations, use a more open mind, make friends with more outstanding people, and establish weak links with them.

Weak links with outstanding people are the “shortcut” to our rapid growth.

Weak links also require time and effort to maintain.

Send him a blessing during the Chinese New Year; add a comment to his share; see that he is collecting likes, so click one for him; vote for his child's composition contest... some casual things Even a little effort can make the other person feel grateful.

Your precious people are hidden among those who pass you by, please take good care of them.

Perhaps, the turning point in your life lies in the comments you wrote with care to share the article, and in the friend request you made seriously.

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