If you are honest with yourself, you may find that your life is external to his existence. One is to live for responsibility, the other is to live for others, and the third is to live unconsciously. A parent has devoted his life to his children, which is not a quality worth promoting. Sometimes, for children, this kind of effort is a great depression and a siege of life. Unless she can turn her sacrifice for him into an intrinsic element of her own existence, and in this existence, she can light up her own path and gain the joy of realization, otherwise, her sacrifice can only be for him and she is responsible. Only when she regards the child as a stage in the process of life, a temporary moment, not all of her, and does not sacrifice herself for the realization of the child's life, her responsibility is internal and for herself. The sacrifices we used to praise are unnecessary. There is no need to be the existence meaning and motivation of parents in the world (especially in China). In the final analysis, you still have to live for yourself. Every mother should be Wang Qiyao in Song of Eternal Sorrow or Scarlett in Gone with the Wind.

We are used to treating the unconditional sacrifice of our parents as the practice of great love, but we don't want to regard it as the unconditional fulfillment and fulfillment of our responsibilities. Yes, there is love, and blood is thicker than water, which is undeniable. However, responsibility has also been immersed in their flesh and blood. This is the responsibility of life, the sacred duty. They believe that the child is their own, no matter how he is, no matter whether they love him or hate him, there is no doubt that they should bring him up and give him the best. This is the responsibility of nature. People have been doing this for thousands of years. This is love, responsibility and the order of life. So parents often sacrifice themselves to achieve their children. We always have wrong prejudices when dealing with children. The truth was evaded by us. In the name of love, we are doing everything: nurturing, educating, toiling and sacrificing until we die. How much love is there? Maybe when children are young, they have heartfelt love. When he is old, love will gradually disappear, and reason and inertia will continue to raise children in the name of love. Instinct certainly works, but it soon disappears, leaving only responsibility. It is it, not love, that maintains family stability and order. Because love is not the rule, responsibility is. Only mandatory norms can maintain stability, not consciousness and instinct.

As long as you do it, the practitioner of responsibility will suddenly find that there are so many other values and happiness in life, just like discovering a new world, and she has gained unprecedented happiness in life. Living for others means living in a system of prejudice and evaluation, living in laws, orders, norms and countless rules and regulations. The only thing to follow is the inner impulse and spiritual desire, not the external rules and regulations. Nothing can bind a free mind unless you are willing to abandon it for some worldly interests. No matter how heavy your body is, your heart should always be dancing and singing lightly. In this way, your existence is meaningful. Just because you don't live for duty or others doesn't mean you live with awareness. You may still be ignorant, empty and tired. You only live for yourself. You remember this and remind yourself all the time, but it doesn't really make you enjoy it. Because you are not happy, you haven't really found your own way, and you don't know what you have to do to be happy. So in order to deceive yourself and transfer self-doubt, you will indulge in games and hobbies that you are not interested in, and kill time in this hopeless immersion. It brings you more pain, but nothing. To get rid of it, you must open your heart and accept yourself as Osho said. This is the first step, and then go into the center of the world to experience it, so that you know what you should do and where to go.