The correct way for parents to discipline their children
The correct way for parents to discipline their children. Children are the top priority of mothers. As parents, we need to take the responsibility of educating children. Educating children is Very important. Next, I will take you to understand the relevant content on the correct methods for parents to discipline their children. Methods for parents to correctly discipline their children 1
1. To discipline children, you must do what you say
When scolding loudly, the child can be frightened into crying "as you wish", but after too many times, , he got used to it, and his attention wandered every time he was scolded, and he was not listening at all. It is said that "when you enter an abalone house, you will hear it for a long time without realizing its smell."
Therefore, when disciplining children, you must do what you say and do what you say. Threats will be ineffective if they are used too often.
2. Yelling and scolding your child is a waste of time
The disadvantage of scolding your child is that when he becomes nervous, his brain will automatically switch to an escape mechanism and all his attention will be lost. All the efforts were focused on how to escape, and the parents wasted their time.
In addition, imitation is a child's nature. If you yell at him loudly, he will yell at others outside in the future. This will make him unpopular and unable to make good friends, and he will be very lonely in his future life. And if you yell at him, he will continue to yell at your grandson in the future.
People are curious. The more unclear they are, the more they will pay attention to listen. Therefore, if you want your child to pay attention to what you are saying, you don’t have to yell loudly, as long as it arouses his motivation. The less you want him to hear, the more he will pay attention. In fact, the best way to communicate is to teach by example, because children who are too young cannot reason yet. When adults show it to them, they will naturally learn it.
3. How to discipline children without yelling?
1. Listen patiently
When parents who are angry and frustrated face children who do not listen to discipline, Usually the most immediate response is to yell. But this doesn't solve the problem at all. The key to disciplining children is to find out the reason why the child made the mistake, start at the source, and eliminate the cause.
At this time, parents should calm down first, be more patient, and ask their children why they did this. When parents focus on understanding their children's thoughts and finding ways to help their children solve problems, they may find that their children's behavior is actually excusable, and they have released a lot of negative emotions.
2. Put down your status
Negotiate with your children. Some parents always like to remain dignified in front of their children and are used to treating their children with a superior-to-subordinate attitude. However, doing so often intensifies conflicts. , told him not to want it but he insisted on it. At this time, parents may wish to put down their posture and not always order their children, but to negotiate with their children. It may be a good way for each of them to take a step back.
For example, when a child wants to jump on the sofa, but the parent has something to think about, you can ask the child to jump on the bed in the bedroom, or ask him to wait for a while before jumping, or wait for the parent to handle the matter. After that, take the children to the park to dance as much as they want.
3. Let the children experience the consequences
If the children always cannot listen to adults, it is useless no matter how much you yell. So on the premise of ensuring safety and no bad consequences, parents can also let their children "eat their own consequences." Through their own practical experience, children will be able to deeply understand how correct and important their parents' teachings are.
4. Reasoning with children In addition to usual warnings, parents should also teach their children certain principles in actual situations.
Let your child have empathy, let him experience it from the perspective of others, and truly understand how his behavior affects others. As for the way to explain the truth, the depth of explanation can be selected according to the age of the child. For particularly young children, storytelling can be used.
5. Give the child another choice. When the child makes a mistake, you don’t just yell at the child and preach the truth, but give the child another choice.
In other words, don't just say "no", please point out a possible way for him to take.
The brain is like a prairie. There is already a road from A to B. If you don't want him to take this road, you have to hold his hand and take another road that can also lead to B. After walking for a long time, a new road will appear. When the grass is trampled down, a new road is formed, while the old road is not visible for a long time and is covered by the growing grass. Methods for parents to correctly discipline their children 2
Have rules
Rules determine success. Rules cannot be broken. Systems are indispensable. Without rules, there will be no success.
On the road of education, we need to be a "ruthless person" and not always feel sorry for our children and let them indulge.
As the saying goes: "Without rules, there is no rule."
There are many things in this world that require compliance with rules. When parents do not strictly control them, children will only be loose and difficult to discipline.
As parents, we must always remember that it is the parents' responsibility to strictly control their children so that they can understand sense and distinguish right from wrong.
Don’t always satisfy your children
Parents should selectively satisfy their children’s requirements and resolutely refuse inappropriate requests. Principled parents , in order to cultivate a child who knows how to control desires.
There is a sentence in "The Courage to Discipline":
Educate children to discipline them harshly when they are young and give them wings when they grow up.
But the biggest tragedy in education is that no one takes care of it when we are young, but no one can take care of it when we grow up.
On the road of life, parents need to guide their children to do the right things.
Be a role model for your children
Dong Qing said: What you want your children to become, you must first become.
Tolstoy once said: "All education, or nine hundred and ninety-nine percent of education, comes down to role models." This is the principle of educating others first.
Children are like a blank sheet of paper. Parents are the first to write. The appearance of parents is the appearance of children.
French child education expert Mark Renaud pointed out two crucial factors in early childhood education. One of them is to establish the authority of parents and be good at saying "no" to children's "willfulness". Because sometimes, children don't know what's best for them, and it's the parents' responsibility to teach them right from wrong.
As parents, we are the guardians of a family. We need to weigh all aspects of life, make correct decisions for the development of the family, and make reasonable plans for the future of our children. However, these are based on the needs of our children. Cognition, they are difficult to understand. Therefore, we can listen to our children's distress, allow them to express their thoughts reasonably, and give them the right to make appropriate choices in certain matters, but we do not have to deliberately pursue equality, discuss everything with them, and listen to their opinions.
When a child is born in our lives, before he is 18 years old, we are the authority and guardians, and we are responsible for him. Our attitude will directly affect the child he will become in the future. What kind of person.
If we only emphasize complete "respect" and neglect to discipline them, we will completely lose the opportunity to educate them. The result is a person who does not respect authority, has no rules, is uneducated, and is selfish. Such children will suffer greater and more blows in school and in the workplace in the future.
Upholding the duties and roles of parents, helping children establish boundaries and rules, and completing the discipline of children without hurting or humiliating them is the greatest responsibility for their future. 3 ways for parents to correctly discipline their children
1. Be friends with your children and do not take drastic actions
To educate your children correctly, you need to put down your attitude and take the initiative to be friends with your children instead of always Acting superior. Parents should often have in-depth and intimate conversations with their children to convey their love for them.
In addition, when children make mistakes, parents must first calm down their emotions and avoid taking excessive actions against their children. No matter how indiscriminate they are, they must first use a stick to teach them. Instead, they must calmly help their children analyze and solve problems. .
Treating children roughly will not only prevent them from realizing their mistakes and correct them, but it will also leave a shadow in their hearts and their personalities will become extreme.
2. Give your children more company
No one can replace the love and companionship of parents. Only with the careful teaching and companionship of parents can children receive a better education. , develop good habits.
However, in real life, many parents are forced to ask grandparents to come over to help look after their children or simply leave their children in their hometown due to the pressure of life.
In this case, parents cannot give their children enough companionship, which will have a negative impact on his growth.
Therefore, parents should treat their children more attentively, communicate with them more or make more videos or make phone calls to keep abreast of their life and study situation, so that they can feel that even if their parents are not around, I still care about and love myself.
3. Parents should set a good example
Parents are their children’s first teachers, and every word and deed will have a subtle impact on their children. Therefore, parents You must lead by example and set a good example for your children.
There are many scholarly families like this. The parents are of high quality and good moral character, and the children are naturally well-educated.
On the contrary, if children grow up in a chaotic family environment, it will be difficult for children to develop good behavioral habits.
4. Learn to respect children
Although children must depend on their parents to grow up, they are also independent individuals and need respect from others, such as:
Respect Children's interests - Interest is the inner driving force that continuously stimulates children's creativity. When children show interest in a certain aspect, parents should not stifle it, but should encourage it so that interest can help children learn a new skill;
Respect children's personality - when children make mistakes, parents should not scold them excessively, but should help them realize their mistakes and guide them to make corrections to avoid making them again next time;
Respect your children’s opinions – When important decisions need to be made in the family, don’t forget to ask your children’s opinions, especially decisions that relate to their lives. In this way, children can feel respected and grow more confident and outstanding in the future.
Children are like a blank sheet of paper. Their growth and success depend entirely on their parents’ careful education and training. Parents who learn the above four points can not only help their children develop physically and mentally healthily, but also establish a close parent-child relationship so that their children can grow up in a warm and harmonious family atmosphere.