As the saying goes, "Where there is oppression, there is resistance", but forcibly suppressing the way a child grows up will greatly destroy her body and mind. On the surface, she is a good student, but she has long been ignorant behind her back.
I have a friend who has played the role of a good girl since she was a child and has never done anything out of line, but since she graduated from college, she has wanted to ride a motorcycle, go to a bar and try many new things she has never tried, which is somewhat rebellious and crazy.
As parents, we should not only look at the surface of children, but try to have potential communication with their hearts and learn to guide them instead of being their class and enemies.
2. Suppressing education is easy to cultivate children with hollow disease.
What is hollow disease? It is a psychological obstacle caused by the defect of values. The symptom is that life is meaningless. People are confused about life and don't know what they want.
Children trained by repressive education have an unconscious mental dependence, and all things and decisions are arranged and planned by their parents. Such children are easy to lack values and choices.
She doesn't know what the right choice is or what the right direction is. Everything she is doing now is what her parents want her to do, not what she wants to do. After obeying her parents' rules and arrangements, she will fall into unprecedented confusion and even feel that life is meaningless.
3. Repressive education is easy to cultivate children with inferiority.
The so-called inferiority complex is more serious than the lack of self-confidence. People with inferiority complex are unwilling to test their inferences about themselves, do not believe in their own self-worth, and are too sensitive to interpersonal relationships and society.
They will think that they are useless, that everything they do is wrong, that they are sensitive, self-abased, suspicious, unconfident and even in a state of depression and anxiety for a long time.
Parents of repressive education: "How can I have such a stupid child like you? Nothing is like others. "
The suppression of words.
4. The original intention of suppressing education is good. Parents want to urge their children to become better, not only because of their immediate achievements, but the reality is often the opposite. Some children will question themselves or misunderstand that their parents don't approve of them after being stimulated by their parents' words. After a long time, it will affect the establishment of children's self-confidence and even produce a psychological tendency of inferiority. The influence of education can even run through a person's life. From this perspective, repressive education is not good for children's sound personality.
Repressive education is not equal to provocation, because the characteristics of repressive education are mainly comparison, neglect and incomprehension.
There is a universal and hidden education mode in contemporary society, which is mainly manifested in parents suppressing their desires through verbal stimulation to achieve the effect of promoting their children's growth, so it is also called "suppression education". This educational model is rooted in most families, but it is only expressed in a subtle and hidden form: as parents often say, "How many children are there in other people's homes ... Look at you ..." "Why can others ..." or their attitude towards children. Is this deformed education really good for children, or will it only make children lack self-confidence?