Parents carefully create educational traps for their children. Many parents tend to turn a blind eye. They only see the advantages of other children, but they don't see the disadvantages. It is easy to create traps for children in education. The following is an educational trap that parents carefully create for their children!
Parents carefully create educational traps for their children 1 There have always been many misunderstandings and blind spots in education. Teachers and parents will enter this misunderstanding and even go to blind spots ... which is very unfavorable for children's growth.
In the education of children, we often think that children are too young to learn anything, or that children will be under pressure if they learn too much, so some parents like to adopt "stocking" education for their children, especially some parents think that boys should be "stocking" to avoid feminization, because mothers are in charge and kindergartens are all female teachers.
In fact, children's "stocking" education is based on children's consciousness. If your child is really sensible and has a strong learning ability, he can basically learn it as soon as he learns, so don't bother. Children are willing to learn whatever they like, and they don't feel compelled to listen, because their understanding is very good, and they will learn even if they don't listen carefully.
However, if your child is a naughty child, or has a bad impression on learning itself, then it is necessary to train your child in a planned way, which is still a "stocking" type. Children will become unruly and disorganized, just like being placed in a deep forest. Except for crazy play and aimless watching and listening, there will be no good learning effect. When it is necessary to follow the rules like a primary school student, it is too late. Naughty boys are born with a sense of "barbarism", so children will not become "mothers" because of your control. Only quiet boys are easy to be feminine.
What parents call "study pressure" is actually caused by parents themselves. Many parents like to follow suit. When they see other children learning piano, ballet and martial arts, they feel elegant and powerful. Without considering the suitability of their children, they hastily signed up for various interest classes. Let children learn what they don't like to learn. This is the "pressure" of children. They were forced to study helplessly. If it is something that children are interested in, even if they enroll in three or four subjects, they will learn with relish and never feel tired, just as people who love chicken legs are never tired of eating them, and those who don't like them will not be ungrateful if you send them to eat them, and even if you barely eat them, you will feel sick.
Many times, when you need to create something, first think about whether your child is interested in it. Just as you love to wear skirts, you won't be afraid to wear them even in winter. People who don't like to wear skirts will leave them at home even if they give a priceless skirt. So are children. You can choose more interest classes for your children and let them cultivate their specialties in their own interests. Parents who don't like interest classes really have to choose, waste financial resources and prevent their children from learning a good result, which hurts both god and money. However, on the other hand, whether children are interested or not, we should let them learn in principle, just as we still insist that children should learn to walk and run no matter how afraid they are of falling, otherwise they will never walk. For example, in kindergarten, we must let children learn etiquette, know how to respect and filial piety their elders, and know the concepts of personal hygiene and time. These are all things that children should learn in principle. As the saying goes, there is no Fiona Fang without rules. However, parents often feel that their children are still young and very distressed. They often make their children late. When the nails grow out, I always say that I am too busy to forget, but I will never cut my nails tomorrow, including politeness. Many parents know that their children will not take the initiative to greet their elders or remind them. Even if they remind their children, they won't bark or criticize them, they will only get away with it ... Many children are used to forming all kinds of bad habits, and parents are always thinking about things. Looking down, I don't think it is necessary to be strict with such a small child everywhere. In fact, it is a kind of harm to children. Children often don't get the wrong correction and attention, and begin to think that these are insignificant and nothing remarkable. They gradually became more serious, began to rebel against their parents, talked back to their parents, refused to wash their hands and take a bath, refused to get up at school, and always didn't want to go to school.
Therefore, during the period when the child can still correct it, it must be strictly controlled. After preschool, children's habits will become natural, and it will be difficult to educate children. Children will also have independent thinking and will not listen to their parents everywhere. At this time, it is useless for you to scold the child desperately or even hit the child. Blame yourself for creating an educational "trap" for children in their childhood, so parents and friends must communicate with teachers more, read more books and read more newspapers.
Parents carefully create educational traps for their children. Speaking of family education, every parent has a clear idea, and they are educating their children wholeheartedly, hoping that their children can be better than blue in shine on you. However, every parent's understanding of family education is different, and it is inevitable that they will do bad things with good intentions and try their best to keep their children away from themselves.
Zhou Yang's mother likes watching mobile phones. At home, she often stays with her mobile phone. Zhou Yang is doing his homework, and his mother is brushing videos and laughing from time to time. When he heard his mother laughing, Zhou Yang wanted to see what was in his mobile phone, and he was inevitably distracted. Seeing that the child doesn't study hard, the mother will inevitably scold the child.
Zhou Yang's homework is messy, and his mother is often called to school by the teacher. Her mother admitted that she didn't pay so much attention to the teacher's office at school, which made her son lose face.
On the other hand, Chen Peng likes reading. He gets up early to read every morning. At first, my mother would accompany Chen Peng to study in the morning. Later, the children gradually developed the habit of asking for early reading.
Now I have just entered the third grade of primary school, and I have memorized almost half of the ancient poems and accumulated many famous sayings and aphorisms. Chen Peng's composition is an example in the class almost every time, and it is circulated by the students.
Different parents choose different ways of education, and different ways will have different effects on their children. The wrong way of education will make children feel inferior and timid, which will affect their lifelong development.
Many parents unconsciously fall into the trap of family education. Are you there?
1, compare other people's children with your own.
Many parents tend to turn a blind eye. They only see the advantages of other children and don't see the disadvantages. When they look at their children, they only see their shortcomings and don't see their advantages. They will also compare the shortcomings of their children with the advantages of other children.
Obviously, they have worked hard, but they are not good enough in the eyes of their parents. Many children will inevitably have resentment and think that their parents look down on themselves, which may lead them to think that their parents don't love them.
2. Stick education
Speaking of stick education, we are all familiar with it. Many families are promoting stick education. If the child is disobedient, he will start to fight until he is obedient. Perhaps in the eyes of parents, it is natural to educate their children, but they ignore their feelings.
Under the threat of parents' force, the child reluctantly gave in, but left a shadow in his heart. They will choose to close their hearts, refuse to communicate with their parents, and even think that their parents will only beat themselves, and they simply don't understand their feelings, regardless of their own life and health, which will inevitably misunderstand their parents' painstaking efforts.
The absence of a father when a child is growing up.
In many families, men are responsible for making money to support their families, and women are responsible for taking care of children and families. So many men think that it is a woman's business to help their children with their homework and play with them, and they are preoccupied with money. In fact, the father plays a very important role in the growth of children.
In the process of communicating with her father, the girl learned how to communicate with the opposite sex. Her father taught her children to be brave and let them face the unknown. Therefore, the role of the father is irreplaceable by anyone. In the process of children's growth, the father must not be absent.
What effect will the wrong concept of family education bring to children?
1, lack of confidence
Many children lack self-confidence when they grow up because they are not affirmed by their parents when they are young. They feel that they are not worthy of good things. Even if they do well, they still feel inferior and dare not speak in front of everyone.
I hope I can become a dust, not be found by others, and habitually hide in the corner. I don't want everyone to be self-centered, habitually being invisible, habitually following others, and being a shadow people.
2. Lack of the ability to perceive happiness
If a person doesn't know what happiness is, how can he perceive it? Children are unhappy in childhood, insecure about everything around them, don't believe that they will be happy, and don't believe that someone will bring them happiness.
Obviously, I had a good life, but I felt unhappy and even said a lot of irrelevant words. Lack of the ability to perceive happiness often leads to the loss of the happiness that has been obtained.
3. Like to control others
Because of the lack of inner security, children habitually control the people around them, hoping that people around them will always turn around themselves and hope that they can become the center of each other. In fact, this idea is unrealistic.
After all, everyone has their own life and things, and it is impossible to always revolve around one person. And like to control others is bound to cause the other person's disgust, and it is likely to lose this relationship.
To give children the right family education, parents should pay attention to the following aspects:
1, give children a peaceful growth environment.
With the fast pace of life and unprecedented economic pressure, many parents are not happy. Their minds are full of unfinished homework and the mortgage to be paid soon, and their hearts are full of anxiety. In this case, it is difficult for parents to provide a peaceful growth environment for their children.
In fact, parents should learn to release their pressure. When they are in a good state, they can pass on this happiness to their children, create a good environment for their growth and give them a good family education.
2. Parents learn to let go
Many parents are worried that their children are doing something wrong, that their children are in danger, and hope to help them do things. Over time, children will become dependent on their parents. Therefore, parents should learn to let go and let their children do it without worrying that their children will do something wrong. In the process of making mistakes, children will make rapid progress.
3. Take time to get along with your children alone and communicate actively.
Parents are busy at work and children are busy at school. They meet every day, can't say a few words, and it is difficult to communicate with each other. Parents don't even know what their children are thinking. Parents should take time out to get along with their children alone every day, actively communicate and promote the healthy development of parent-child relationship.
In the process of communication, parents understand their children's inner thoughts, adjust their own educational methods, and formulate new educational policies according to their wishes, so that children can feel their parents' care and love for their children.
abstract
Parent-child relationship will affect children's life development. Therefore, parents should attach importance to family education, create a happy family atmosphere and promote the healthy growth of children.