As for EQ, you just see that he doesn't have many friends at ordinary times. That's all. Why? Just because we are all mediocre, who will have many friends? In our minds, people with many friends are often good at words, but what they say has no gold content. It seems that everything can be involved, but they only know a little, and they have not reached the point of perfection in a certain aspect. Such people seem to be very popular, but they are often at the bottom of society, and most of the people around them are mediocre. True emotional intelligence can't be judged by the number of friends. What is high emotional intelligence in reality? It is often people who know how to retreat for progress, who know how to make concessions on certain things, and when to retreat rather than advance. Like Sima Yi, can you say that his emotional intelligence is low? Although the emperor rejected him on the surface and his ministers snubbed him, his former generals still supported him convincingly, and finally he decided the world. This kind of talent belongs to high emotional intelligence. When the emperor doesn't like you, he knows how to retreat, keep a low profile and make a big splash at the critical moment, which belongs to high IQ.
As for a person who does things, there are no friends, which is only the surface of the problem, but what we want to know about a person is often lack of substantive analysis. Because we just saw his superficial behavior and the superficial phenomenon we heard from others. But if we communicate deeply with ourselves, we can understand that such people are often much more powerful than we think.
I am a loner. I got married at 17 and divorced at 22. My ex-husband left a son and a daughter. Since then, I have started a lonely life with my children. After a long 44-year lonely life, I became everything Dont Ask For Help. I have an independent personality. Hard-working and kind. I have lived well in recent years and I am willing to help people who are not as good as me. But I really don't want to make friends. I don't like people coming to my house to play. I am sharp. Withdrawn personality. But I'm not introverted. I also like to travel alone. Go every day; walk Long-term loneliness has caused me to tolerate no one. No matter who I contact with once or twice, I can tell what will happen if I continue to associate with him. Where is the destination? Happiness is sorrow. Take in everything in a glance. This is probably clear water without fish. I live a happy life now. The children grew up and my grandchildren were brought up by myself. I have no worries about food and clothing now. I dress myself up every day. Although I'm not perfect. But I really can't accept anyone. I don't think a low-quality marriage is as good as a high-quality single. It is better to be happy than to please others. I don't want to make trouble for myself. If a woman can live independently, she will have a lot of troubles. Parents are princesses, men are princesses. I am the queen by myself. Depend on parents, parents will grow old. Shit, a man can run. ......
I agree with this sentence.
With the increase of age and daily affairs, many people will eventually become "unsociable".
to tell you the truth, I'm becoming a loner.
Let's not talk about the time before school. I joined the work in 2. After taking part in the work, work 8 hours a day and take a day off every week. In those years, after work every afternoon, I always went home for dinner first, and after dinner, I found friends from the same village to play games (arcade) in the game hall. Later, after playing the game, I have to find a restaurant to go home after dinner. With the increase in the number of meals, sometimes, after work, I make an appointment with my friends to go to a certain restaurant for dinner in the evening. It is inevitable to drink a little wine when eating. Later, with the passage of time, friends would get together every three or five days.
Later, when I got married and had children, I had to arrange my family affairs before going out for dinner. If I had something to do at home, I wouldn't go out. In the years when my children went to kindergarten, it was easier and I was free to go out and get together with my friends.
Later, my child went to primary school and had homework every day. I always had to finish tutoring my child's homework before going out.
when friends start drinking, they can control the amount and never faint. Later, with the increase of drinking times and friends, the amount of drinking is also increasing, and sometimes I have to drink twice a night. When I arrived here, there was a "drinking dizzy". Drunk to sleep in the flower bed, drunk to ride a bike and wrestle, drunk to lose your mobile phone, drunk to lose your wallet, drunk to find a home, etc., all these situations have happened to friends. Then I began to be afraid of drinking gradually, in fact, I was afraid that my friends would faint (including myself).
I have a problem with drinking. If I only drink half a catty of white wine, that's fine. Nothing will be delayed. But if I drink white wine until seven or eight, I can fall asleep at night, but I can't fall asleep deeply. The next morning, the class meeting will be particularly "sleepy", and I want to slow down until the next afternoon, and the next night I am still "sleepy" and will go to bed early to make up my sleep.
Now, it's tiring to work all day. I have to help my children with their homework when I get home, and I want to write two questions and answers to earn money for cigarettes. If you drink alcohol at night, you must control it within half a catty, and go home to wash and sleep before 1 o'clock. Only in this way can you not affect your energy the next day. But this is especially difficult when my friends are drinking now. So now my friends ask for drinks, and I always hide. I don't go if I can, and I don't drink if I can.
I don't go drinking with my friends many times, and a friend said to me, "You haven't followed the group recently, so you can't go on like this."
it's not that I don't want to meet my friends, but I'm afraid that drinking too much will affect my normal work and family affairs the next day.
two months ago, I was thinking, is the highest level of drinking "drinking by yourself" at home?
when my dad was young, he was in business, and there were a lot of wine fields. I didn't work in the company ten years ago. In the past seven or eight years, I haven't gone out to play with my friends, nor have I gone out to drink with my former friends, that is, I have stopped following the group. I always drink two ounces at home at noon and three ounces at night. Is this really the highest level of drinking?
when I used to like to cajole and drink with my friends, I changed to drinking alone at home. This is all a manifestation of "not following the group". I'm gradually getting rid of my friends' "wine field" and becoming a "loner"!
Therefore, I agree with the saying, "The highest state of life is to be unsociable". With the increase of everyone's daily affairs and age, many people will become "out of group"!
The highest state of life is being unsociable. I don't quite agree with this statement.
I'm an ordinary person. As an ordinary person, if I don't get along with my family at home, it's hard to be at home and do everything. If you don't fit in with your colleagues in the work unit, it will affect your work at a small scale, and it will affect the work of the whole unit at a large scale. I am still in favor of the saying that comrades should be treated with warmth like spring. As long as they are comrades, everyone should get along well. Even those who have opposed themselves, as long as they are not sincere, should unite with them for the sake of work. When I was a deputy company commander in the army, a monitor once contradicted me. Later, I became an instructor and became the head of the company. He was afraid that I would give him little shoes to wear and repeatedly asked me to admit his mistakes. I told him that I am not a narrow-minded person. As long as you work hard, we are still good comrades. He put down his ideological burden and did a good job. At my suggestion, he was transferred to a volunteer and became the backbone of the company.
People are gregarious animals. Whether in life or at work, it is inevitable that you need me, and I need you. It is very important to get along with others. Even people who have opposed themselves, if you can repay evil with good, still regard him as a comrade, which is good for the relationship between people and work.
As the saying goes, the police with the highest gambling skill just don't go, and the highest police in life is unsociable, all of which are words of wisdom. The person who really doesn't get along with others is not cultivated at the beginning, but the strength and courage that he has experienced success and failure on the road of life makes him feel guilty, and he feels inferior and waits for success to come back with time spirit, so this is the reason why he doesn't fit in. Take myself as an example. For more than 2 years, if I had to spend most of my time at home at the mahjong table except sleeping from dawn to dark, I could really talk about the life of the emperor. If I had friends at the wedding banquet, there would be 8, but later, because my business changed and I became greedy and poor, I had less contact with them for ten years and eight years and thought that I was different today. Their grades didn't even call. Now I can watch TV and news at home without going downstairs all day. Sometimes I go to the street to buy food and meet ordinary friends and say hello. I've been used to it for nearly ten years, but one thing I haven't changed is going downstairs to exercise for half an hour every morning. I always think that people have a future with health.
Hello, everyone. I'm a miscellaneous talk. I'm going to talk about my personal views, and I'm waiting for you to comment on my shortcomings to increase my advantages in answering questions. Thank you
for your personal recognition. I have always been introverted and not good at communication. No matter at school or at work, I have less contact with people, so that I have fewer playmates, and I am basically alone. Perhaps it is because a person is used to it and introverted that he finds that he doesn't like to join in the fun. No matter whether classmates, colleagues or friends call out to play, they will refuse to go out. I don't want to go out and listen to what they say. I just want to stay in my room and watch movies and play games.
With the passage of time and the growth of age, I feel more and more lack of self-confidence and more inferiority. When I really want to communicate with people, I am afraid that others will not look down on me and feel inferior to others. Under this kind of thinking, I dare not take the initiative to make friends with people, but I am even more afraid of interacting with people and being alone in my spare time.
In fact, whether you are gregarious or not, it doesn't matter. It's important not to care about other people's eyes, be yourself, and there is no need to associate with them. Continue to work hard towards your life goals.
I am an unsociable person. When I was young, I suffered a great blow from my personality, and I developed a profound understanding of my outlook on life and the world. Often, 99% people said that it was right, but I gave different opinions. One day, ten days or even ten years later, I proved that the truth was here. How can I get along with others? But I'm not lonely or introverted. Even hit the village head and mayor. Although I am not big, I never lock the door when I sleep alone at night. I firmly believe that as long as I am right and not afraid of ghosts knocking at the door in the middle of the night, my life will be short and happy, and my children will have careers and real estate in first-tier cities. I, a little old man in a remote rural area, should know enough. Now the old rural houses have been taken care of by me for more than ten years, with flowers and green trees all year round. But I still don't want to get along with the children. I'm going home to raise chickens and fish, learn a driver's license to travel by car, and pick up the lost past again.
have you ever seen tigers in groups? In droves, that's sheep!
about gregarious, you have to understand it the other way around.
there is nothing wrong with gregarious, because human beings are social animals. Some people are extroverted and like to find a pleasure in the crowd, which is nothing and understandable.
but!
some people like noise, others don't want to be disturbed.
it's your freedom to fit in. It is people's freedom to be unsociable.
It's your business if you like it yourself, but you can't tie people up, put the knife holder around your neck, and then carry them over to accompany you.
Everyone is driving in his own lane and has his own life track. Therefore, everyone should know how to respect and give way, instead of just stepping on the accelerator and bumping into it head-on.
This is a private life perpetrator.
you can't say that TA looks down on you just because people don't drink, and you can't say that people don't understand amorous feelings just because they don't go to karaoke together. People who don't participate in group activities are monsters, and people who don't follow the drama say that they don't have emotional appeal.
Actually, people really don't drink, don't like singing, don't watch the series you watch, and really like silence.
People's mood may be much higher than yours. People actually have their own groups, but you are not in their groups.
Freedom is priceless. You can't exclude people and question them just because they don't fit in. No matter what you think or do, you have no right to kidnap anyone.
don't let gregarious become a kind of blindness.
socializing should be beneficial! Be gregarious and effective!
There's a saying in Luo Yonghao: "People with ideas don't fit in anywhere."
people who want to talk about everything and make a noise are actually the least attractive. People who want to participate in everything and refuse everything, in fact, what do they want? I have no idea.
Loneliness is not the same as loneliness, let alone a concept. Not all loners are lonely, but lonely people are definitely loners.
Carina Lau once said that Tony Leung Chiu Wai could stay in a corner of the house and be silent all day and all night, saying that he didn't like publicity and attending activities.
But Tony Leung Ka Fai and Liu Qingyun still celebrate his birthday every year, and Chow Yun Fat and Felix Wong Yat Wa often go fishing with him in Dongshatou, New Territories.
Being unsociable is actually just because he just wants to stay with people he likes and things he wants to do.
Even the best actor feels very tired in disguise. Have you won an Oscar? Or have you thanked CCTV and MTV? Are you tired?
even if you know all the earthlings, how many earthlings know you?
In their spare time, some people go out alone to buy food, go shopping, take a walk, dance, listen to music, read books, take a walk, keep fit and travel.
some people have nothing to do, and a large group of people push cups for a change, eat, drink and be merry. A group of people get together to discuss entertainment gossip, current affairs and politics, and study Taobao discounts.
which lifestyle is more advanced?
most pleasures are actually sensory pleasures. once the support of external objects is lost, this pleasure will not last. Therefore, the picture is a temporary pleasure.
Pleasure should be sustained. Therefore, spiritual pleasure is the highest pleasure!
People whose way of thinking is not on the same channel often have nothing in common.
the higher the realm, the more he wants, not friends, but confidants.
The reason why excellent people don't fit in well is that they know how to think about gains and losses and know how to distinguish between the serious and the bad. Because they know what they need and what they don't need better than those who work hard to get along with others.
"Loneliness is a person's carnival. Carnival is the loneliness of a group of people "
How big the carnival is, how deserted it is when it is over. Like-minded souls are truly integrated. What can make a person's loneliness feel rich is called realm!
it's really easy to try to be someone else; It is hard to be yourself with your heart.
do it with your heart.