Second, understand children's feelings. Parents should not only take care of their children physically, but also care about their children psychologically and understand their feelings. When the children come back from school and talk to you excitedly, are you interested in listening? Have you ever scolded your child in front of others and compared your child's weaknesses or shortcomings with the strengths and weaknesses of other children? Do you respect children's right to privacy? Would you like to be with them? Children not only have physical needs, but also psychological needs. We should respect them, share their happiness and pain, and become children's bosom friends. To this end, we must first attach importance to children like friends, carefully understand their feelings and understand their ideas; Commitments to children must be made, and don't break your word easily; Master the methods of emotional communication, such as looking at children with gentle eyes, smiling and nodding to encourage them. These are very conducive to the development of children's love.
Third, don't trade love. The child is disobedient. Some parents are used to threatening them with love. For example, if you can't finish your homework, you won't come back. If you don't do well in the exam, we won't recognize you as a child. The result is that children are afraid, uneasy and rebellious, which not only fails to achieve the expected purpose, but sometimes leads to serious consequences. Children will think that parental love is conditional and unreliable. How can this cultivate children's love? Therefore, if you love your children unconditionally, they will feel the value of their existence and the warmth of love. Only in this way will they have enough energy and time to create their own future and will not feel the crisis of love. Therefore, in life, parents should let their children understand this and believe that their love for their children will not change at all because of their mistakes. On this basis, parents help their children to correct their mistakes and develop the habit of reasoning.
Fourth, give children the opportunity to give love. Many parents only know how to love their children blindly, but ignore the opportunity to give them love. The implementation of love and the acceptance of love are mutual. If children are only allowed to accept love, gradually, they will lose the ability to give love. They only know how to take it, but they don't know how to give it. They feel that it is natural for their parents to care about him. Some parents think they should give their children more care and love. When he grows up, he will respect and love his parents. Actually, this is a misunderstanding. How can children care about their parents if they are not given a chance to learn to care? Other parents think that children's task is to study, and nothing else is important. Only by studying hard can there be a good future, so everything is for the sake of children, clothes reach out and mouth open. Learning is important, but children's personality, habits, quality and psychology are more important to their growth and success, which need to be cultivated in life and study, and will not be achieved overnight. In order to cultivate children's feeling of love, parents should provide children with opportunities and conditions to give love. For example, let them do some simple housework and educate their children to take care of their sick relatives; Educate children to greet the elderly every day; Give a seat to the old man; Help the fallen child up, etc. The news reports that some people are short of money for surgery and their lives are dying. Parents bring their children to donate money to offer love ... Only by putting love into concrete things and people can we get timely reinforcement and feedback, feel happiness and happiness, consolidate the behavior of love and enrich the feelings of love. When parents create opportunities and conditions for their children to express their love, they should give timely encouragement to their children's loving behaviors such as helping others and being compassionate, so that their children can feel infinite happiness. As a song goes, "Please take my song home, please leave your smile".
Fifth, learn to accept children's love. Many parents are used to paying for their children. In the face of children's love, they will make a "refusal" behavior because they are distressed by their children. As everyone knows, this not only can't make children feel the love of their parents, but sometimes it will deeply hurt their enthusiasm for expressing love. Parents should carefully protect their children's first love. It is called "first love" because children's ability to actively express love is still very fragile, and it is easy to shrink back because of adults' rejection, and they dare not express their love again, or even do not want to express their love again. In order to avoid these problems, when children actively express their love, parents should accept it gladly, so that their love can be fully exerted. Sometimes, due to busy work or other reasons, parents turn a blind eye to their children's love, or reprimand them, killing their children's love in the bud. For example, a little girl poured a cup of tea for her mother who just got off work, but her mother said anxiously, "Go, go, who will pour your tea?" Do your homework quickly! "Another example is a child eating an apple peeled by his mother while watching TV. His mother is doing housework, which makes him sweat. The child said to him, "mom, have a rest. I'll help you with your work. You can have an apple." Mom said, "I'm not tired, you eat." The child was very disappointed. In fact, what mom did was inappropriate. She loves her children, and the children love her, so she is invited to eat apples. However, the child has her love, but she doesn't accept it. Perhaps in this rejection of love, she restrained the bud of children's love and made them think that their parents didn't need their love. Parents must not forget that love is a two-way emotional communication. Children want to love others while accepting love, so as to get emotional satisfaction.
Sixth, spending some time with children is the most effective way to cultivate children's love. No matter how busy they are at work, parents should always take some time (preferably every day) to play, entertain, exercise or study with their children, develop feelings with them, understand their psychology and feelings, and form a harmonious parent-child relationship with them. For example, going out with children, while enriching children's knowledge, educate children to cherish every grass and tree and strengthen their feelings for their parents. When communicating with children, we must devote ourselves wholeheartedly and treat them equally. We can't force ourselves or treat our children condescendingly. There are many opportunities to be with children, such as watching TV, playing games, exercising and telling stories. In short, as parents, we should strive to create a harmonious family atmosphere, spend more time with our children, communicate with them emotionally and cultivate their love. As long as we pay attention to the cultivation of children bit by bit in our daily life, we will plant the seeds of "love" As children grow up, this seed will take root in their hearts and grow into a towering tree. Lu Qin, a famous child psychologist and educator, said: "Children's love is immature. If you care about it, it will grow up. " If you ignore it, it will wither; If you hit it, it will die. "So, if you want a caring child, please cherish it, find it in life and cultivate it.