Only those who live in humble circumstances have the opportunity to see the true nature of the world. ——Yang Jiang

Once I saw an interview with Hu Ge, the host asked him: I heard that after you finish filming in the grassland, you will talk to every staff member, including the driver. We all toasted a glass of wine, why do you do this? "

Hu Ge replied: "Everyone made the movie, and only the actors are famous. This is unfair in itself, so we should respect everyone. "

Now everyone understands: Why Hu Ge is becoming more and more popular! If you are unsuccessful in life, no matter how successful you are, you are unlikely to be popular.

In this interview, I saw a Remarkable character - empathy.

What is empathy? It is the ability to stand in the perspective of others, understand their inner emotions and difficulties, and empathize with the unknown. It’s easy to respect everyone from the bottom of my heart.

No wonder Hu Ge has been respected by many people in the entertainment industry.

Even Yang Liping, who has always been aloof. He praised, "Hu Ge is a very well-educated and gentlemanly boy. This actor is one of the rare people I have seen in China with good moral character and good artistic ethics." "

I often answer: Maybe you lack empathy, don't know how to understand others, and don't think from others' perspective. When you think about problems from others' perspective, you will change your way. Communicate instead of being self-righteous.

My aunt and uncle have not been on good terms in recent years. My aunt often complained to me that my uncle was not considerate and did not feel sorry for her. But one time I found my aunt at her house. There is something wrong with the relationship between the sexes.

My uncle is a salesman in our city with a monthly income of over 10,000. When he came home from work in the evening, my aunt looked at her uncle with a Zhou Chang face and felt in her heart. Displeased.

They started to quarrel like this.

I later told my aunt:

My uncle is a salesperson outside. If he runs around looking at people's faces every day and sells products in a lowly manner, he may not only fail to sell the product, but may also be abused by others with dirty words. Salesmen are paid based on performance, and high salaries are accompanied by high pressure. He must have suffered a lot of grievances.

He has no place to vent the grievances he suffered outside. He has a straight face when he comes back. It is not necessarily because he is dissatisfied with you, but because he does not know how to treat others. Say.

At this time, you blame him for being inconsiderate, uncaring, and noisy. Can you live like this?

Later, my aunt suddenly realized that it turned out that Many of their conflicts were not just because his uncle was inconsiderate to him, but because she was always unable to stand from his uncle's perspective and consider the difficulties of his work, which led them to communicate in a resentful way instead of in a mutually understanding way.

Many conflicts between couples are mainly caused by the inability of two people to think in each other's shoes, understand each other, understand each other, and care for each other.

People with strong empathy know how to protect. The interests of others, and a person who lacks empathy must be a selfish and narrow-minded person who always likes to get benefits from others.

A few days ago, a classmate complained to me about her. A friend said that every time she ate with this friend, even if she was doing a favor for her friend, she was the one paying for it, and that her friend always liked to choose expensive meals and never mentioned paying the bill.

In the end, my friend said: My money is earned through hard work, it does not come from the flood, or it falls from the sky. I don’t owe her, so why should I pay for it every time? Is it me who pays for it?

Later, I gave her the advice that it is better to stay away from such a friend, because she never considers your interests, your feelings, and your difficulties, she just Thinking of taking advantage of you.

The more empathic people are, the more comfortable they are to get along with them, because they will respect even those with humbler status.

Feng Lun once mentioned in an article a meal with Li Ka-shing. They originally thought that it was common sense for a business leader to leave after the meal.

When we arrived at the scene, we never expected that Li Ka-shing would hand everyone a personal business card, and the dining seats would be arranged according to the drawing of lots.

At each table, Li Ka-shing will set aside 15 minutes to communicate with the guests. When leaving, he shakes hands with everyone present, including the waiters next to the venue.

A dinner party taught many people a lesson: pursue selflessness, put others in mind, consider other people's feelings, and learn to respect others.

Dong Qing interviewed an old translator on the show, squatting and kneeling for 3 minutes. Shen Mengchen, who was also the host, imitated Zhang Jiayi's hunchback walk at the award ceremony. One out of respect for the old man, the other out of respect. For ridiculing actors with physical disabilities.

If Shen Mengchen had considered the inner feelings of a physically ill person being laughed at before she pranked her, she would not have acted like this. She obviously did not stand in other people's perspective and understand other people's inner feelings. , making an undisciplined act.

This is the difference between people with empathy and people without empathy. One makes you feel comfortable getting along with each other, while the other makes you feel disrespected and unhappy.

I saw a news before. Because of the heavy rain, the delivery boy was late in delivering the food. He kept apologizing to the customer. The customer didn't say anything and just put the food on the delivery boy's face, and then I slapped the delivery boy several times to vent my dissatisfaction.

I was very angry when I saw the video on the news. No matter how dissatisfied you are, you can't hit people casually or trample on other people's dignity. This is a typical self-righteous person.

They take themselves too seriously and don’t take others seriously.

Others regard him as God, but he really thinks that he is God. He drags him as hard as 2,580,000 people. He never considers the difficulty of other people’s lives. He always acts domineeringly and tramples on others ruthlessly. the dignity of others.

To judge a person’s character, you must look at his attitude towards the weak. Yang Jiang once said: Only those in humble circumstances have the opportunity to see the truth of the world.

A person with strong empathy has a softer heart. He can empathize with and understand the suffering and difficulties of others. They will not be selfish, narrow-minded and full of resentment, but live a sunny, peaceful and contented life, thereby treating those around them well. people!

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Introduction by Luan Xi: Look at the workplace from a male perspective and look at life from a female perspective. He can not only analyze the complexity of human nature, but also write about the warmth and coldness of time. His personal official account is "涔玴" (ID: zhangcenxi99), Weibo @张涔西, personal WeChat: cenxi9966