1. Being able to give love is blessing, and being able to eliminate worries is wisdom.

2. Loving you is my patent, let’s see who dares to do illegal things?

3. Either love it or hate it, don’t pretend to be pitiful for me!

4. Sister is not a diamond, but sister is the light that you cannot afford.

5. If God still lets you live, then he must still have his arrangements!

6. I don’t do things that I regret, I only do things that make you regret.

7. Live in your own heart, not in the eyes of others.

8. A woman outside an umbrella is destined not to go out on rainy days.

9. You can pinch off the flowers, but you cannot kill the entire spring.

10. Sir, why are you always wandering between silly A and silly C?

11. Self-esteem, but not narcissism; self-confidence, but not arrogance.

12. Is there anything sad? Say it to make everyone happy.

13. I am not the Mona Lisa, and I will not smile at everyone.

14. You can’t be eaten as food, but I feel full when I see you.

15. Just because we have a holiday, you can’t treat me as a holiday.

16. Only if we don’t get entangled with each other can we live a good life.

17. I smiled desperately just to cover up the slightest pain.

18. The peach blossom blooms in the left eye! The chrysanthemum blooms in the right eye.

19. Fate is responsible for shuffling the cards, but it is ourselves who play the cards.

20. If you are well, it will be sunny. If it is sunny, I will be well.

21. I am a civilized person, and all swear words have been disinfected with saliva.

22. As a person who has been through this, I tell you, don’t come here.

23. When the mistress becomes a regular person, she loses the charm that the mistress had.

24. If you don’t cherish me, I will leave, even if I like you very much.

25. Don’t think that just because you have a bird feather on your body, you are an angel.

26. The brilliance of your dawn will never illuminate my sadness.

27. Women are easy to be satisfied, but they are also easy to make you stumble.

28. Either you love me or leave me. Don’t bother me.

29. Failure is not terrible. What is terrible is that you believe this sentence.

30. You are the water I throw out. Whoever can pretend can pretend.

31. I asked the old lady to put on red lips and give you some color.

32. I am not a good person, but I will try my best to be a good person!

33. If you take black tablets during the day, you will fall asleep, but if you take white tablets at night, you will not be able to sleep.

34. I will work hard to save money and try to buy an ATM.

35. Seeing that you are a little happy makes me a little nervous.

36. People or dogs, get out of my sight.

37. Dreams are very light, but they have the power to fly into the blue sky.

38. Teacher, I met a robber, but my homework was robbed.

39. I don’t care about money. I have always liked money since I was a child.

40. When a man becomes rich, he changes into a car, when he becomes rich, he changes into a house, and when he suddenly becomes rich, he changes into a wife.

41. No matter how high the sky is, standing on tiptoes will bring you closer to the sun.

42. The love you gave me was filled with regret on the day we broke up.

43. Children treat toys as friends, and adults treat friends as toys.

44. You don’t have to study hard, but you can’t not review well.

45. Some things don’t need to be forced, and some people don’t need to be forced to stay.

46. When you go out, please remember: you must return the cow B to the cow!

47. What is your lung capacity? How can you boast so much?

48. I am not a genius because I have never worn Quesnel diapers.

49. Gao Fu Shuai refers to a tall, rich and handsome man.

50. Disease enters through the mouth and disaster comes out of the mouth, so it is safest to shut up!

51. I feel a little happy when I miss you, and a little sad when I miss you.

52. Please put away your attitude and don’t think you know me very well.

53. If life is a one-way ticket, I will take it!

54. Men are all hooligans! It just depends on whether you are good at performing.

55. Life is so damn fun, because life keeps playing tricks on me.

56. How can I let others bully someone who I can’t bear to bully?

57. Who can be as loyal to their partner as they are to RMB?

58. At the end of the road, the dust is shattered, and the resentment and vision of the other side are blooming.

59. If you really can’t bear it, I will rape you my rag doll.

60. It’s good to know what you are.

61. If there were no perverts in the world, would beauties still have value?

62. While loving you, this is the beginning of my challenge to fly into the flames.

63. If you don’t eat, you won’t eat for free. If you eat, you will eat for free. Who doesn’t eat for free?

64. I can choose to give up, but I can’t choose to give up!

65. It is not the years that make people grow old, but the loss of ideals.

66. I am not familiar with Wu Bai, but his younger brother Erbai Wu is very familiar with me.

67. Brother, you have won, the people on earth can no longer stop you!

68. Your fans are flies, because flies love shit.

69. Believe that it’s not that you can’t find it, but that the fate has not arrived yet.

70. In front of you, I lost my pride.

71. There is no such thing as eternal life, and it is pure nonsense.

72. Study hard for China! A pack of Chinese is a lot of money!

73. What a mistress, he is just a human being at best.

74. Before marriage, love is a myth; after marriage, love is a joke.

75. Sometimes, I ignore you because I want you to pay attention to my existence.

76. Old men are lustful because young girls are short of money.

77. Do you believe that I love you, or do you believe that there are ghosts in the world.

78. The blue sky has begun to become turbid, how can the tears become clear?

79. People just fight for a breath, but what they force out is a piece of shit!

80. Alas, my family can no longer afford the heating bill, so we have to burn money.

81. Who is the queen of a famous family? Your father is Marshal Tianpeng!

82. Your shameless look has the charm of my youth.

83. If there is no equal love, then let me love more.

84. Why do you have more nonsense than Hunan TV’s advertisements?

85. It’s not that I look down on you, but I’m simply too lazy to care about you.

86. A friend is someone who sees you through and still likes you.

87. I don’t have to laugh to let you know that I am arrogant by nature.

88. Everyone says I’m ugly, but in fact I’m just more obviously beautiful.

89. Men are easy to use with a mouse, but women are a complicated keyboard.

90. I will let the old lady touch the red lips and give you some color.

91. I am a killer, if masturbating counts as killing someone!

92. Many people have jumped off buildings recently, please be careful not to get hit.

93. There is a kind of love called letting go. After letting go, please leave quickly.

94. Just let me lose my memory and disappear into your world.

95. You shine when I love you. If I don’t love you, you are nothing.

96. Now I realize that streaking in childhood is so bold and unrestrained.

97. Don’t call me arrogant, I just refuse to deal with animals.

98. A woman who pretends to be better than that is called capital, and a man who pretends to be better than that is called perversion.

99. It’s nothing to wear couple’s clothes. From now on, you’ll be more domineering if you drive a couple’s car!

100. It is better to make him feel uncomfortable when he is drunk than to let him feel aggrieved without drinking.

101. Although mistresses need to be new to be interesting, old friends are better.

102. There is no other half with 100 points, only two people with 50 points!

103. When you die, you lose everything, but when you live, you have infinite possibilities.

104. The son born to two people with blood type B will definitely be 2B.

105. Is your coffin a flip-top or a sliding-top?

106. I never hold grudges. I usually avenge them on the spot.

107. Make decisions with a pat on your head, make promises with a pat on your chest, and leave with a pat on the back.

108. No matter how awesome Chopin is, he can’t express the sadness of a woman’s psychology!

109. Girls who are full of swear words are more serious than girls who pretend to be cute.

110. I am the kind of person who is not afraid of death or pain, only afraid of losing you.

111. I am the most honest person. Never tell lies. Except this sentence.

112. Give up your broken tree, and I can get the whole forest!

113. Don’t say love easily, the promise you make is the debt you owe!

114. When external pressure increases, internal motivation should be enhanced.

115. Life without creation cannot be considered life, it can only be considered alive.

116. If I were a princess, I would save a frog.

117. God will definitely forgive me, because that is his profession.

118. If your mind is not as big as the sea, how can you have a career as big as the sea?

119. As a handsome guy, my handsomeness is a pain that you cannot look at directly.

120. If something sad happens, cry it out and let everyone laugh! Humorous words

1. A pair of fly mother and son were having a meal. The son frowned and asked the mother: "Mom, why do we eat poop every day?" The mother said: "Don't say such disgusting words while eating. If so, eat it while it’s hot! ”

2. I look forward to it every day and think about it all the time. I stare at you during the day and see you in my dreams at night. My thoughts are spinning around you, why are you still there? Don’t come to me—five million!

3. Starting tomorrow, the city will decide to get rid of all the mentally handicapped young people who are ugly and detract from the appearance of the city! Pack your things quickly and go out to avoid the limelight. Don't tell anyone that I informed you. Remember! No need to say thank you!

4. From knowing you to this day, you should be very clear about your position in my heart. Except for you, everyone else is a pile of shit in my eyes, but you are different, because you are, two pieces of shit.

5. I can’t resist my longing for you. I can only express my love through images. Don’t laugh at my obsession with you, just because of the wise saying - since ancient times, whoever has no shit in life has to keep a photo. Make toilet paper!

6. Without Pangu, there would be no chance for apes to evolve; without oracle bones as stationery, history would be lifeless; without Daiyu and Baoyu, how could the Red Mansion be passed down for centuries? Without me sending you a message, who knew a pig could look at a cell phone?

7. Occasional forgetfulness does not mean eternity. During the busy period, a faint longing lingers in my heart; during the lonely journey, please accept my ardent care and sincere blessings; I miss you, please let me Let’s eat!

8. Next is the moment to witness the miracle. Press the scroll button once and you will smile; press it twice and you will giggle; press it three times and you will laugh happily; press it four times and congratulations, A fool is born!

9. Someone told me: Sending text messages to the most talented, healthy, honest and kind person is the noblest thing; after thinking about it, I think this person must be you! If you feel the same way, please send me a reply!

10. On behalf of the Party Central Committee, the State Council, the National People's Congress, the Central Military Commission, and the Hong Kong, Macao and Taiwan Office, I would like to make a strong protest to you: Why is there no Taiwan on the map of China you left behind when you wet the bed last night? Remember to make up for it tonight.

11. One monk has to carry water to drink, and two monks have to carry water to drink. This classic story is unforgettable and deeply imprinted in my heart. Now, there is also a temple in the mountain, and there is also an old Taoist in the temple, but the old Taoist is holding a mobile phone and giggling.

12. Top-secret documents of the 16th National Congress: In order to improve the quality of the people, the State Council decided to eliminate a group of ugly and imbecile young people. You should pack your things and go out to avoid them. Don’t thank me, leave quickly and pay attention to safety!

13. You were dragging a pig shopping, looking very happy. I passed by and said with sympathy: "The quality of a person depends on who he is with." Before he finished speaking, he Look at that pig abandoning you with disdain!

14. In order to thank my friends for their love, we now provide a weekend one-day trip, with a full round trip by bus. The activities include cleaning the floor and kitchen oil stains in my house, scrubbing the toilet, washing clothes and bedding, and providing lunch for 210 people. , sign up as soon as possible!

15. A cheer awakens a dream! Say hello and dispel a bit of loneliness! A greeting warms a heart! A blessing and a feeling of concern! A word of "nothing" comforts a feeling of hesitation! A text message can wake up a pig!

16. What to do if you are thirsty? Go to the beach for a walk; what should you do if you are hungry? Let’s have hot pot and shabu-shabu; what to do if you don’t have money? Find a fool to lie to you; what should you do if you don’t have the guts? Go to the cemetery to practice; what if I miss you? So send a text message and give it a try.

17. You and I are both single-winged angels. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. It is said that people come to the world to find their other half. I finally found you after all the hard work, but I found that Our wings are parallel to each other.

18. Judging from your almond-shaped eyes, cherry mouth, curved eyebrows, slender hands, tall figure, charming curves, and pretty face, you must have had your whole body plastic surgery. Allow!

19. Except for the wind, no one will understand the sadness of this city; except for the rain, no one will see the end of this story; except for you, no one is worth letting me care about and follow. ;Dear, I want to say to you: It’s time to pay back the money!

20. According to your birth date, you will definitely make a fortune in the near future. Please follow the tips immediately: get an explosive hairstyle, wear patched clothes, hold a stick in your right hand and a bowl in your left hand, walk along the street and Spell: OK, OK!

21. With you, I forget about food and sleep. Without you, I don’t think about food and drink. With you, my heart is concerned. Without you, I worry about gains and losses.

22. Don’t be discouraged when you encounter setbacks, work hard and don’t let go, strive to be strong and strong, avoid being upset and don’t get angry, be optimistic and live a happy life, don’t be discouraged in places with many people.

23. Friendship is full of meaning to me. When you cry, I cry too. When you laugh, I laugh too. When you jump out of a tall building, I will stick my head out without hesitation. : "Wow, it would be strange not to die!"

24. When I met God that day, he promised me a wish. I said I hoped for world peace, but he said it was too difficult to handle.

I took out your photo and hoped that He would make you more beautiful. God took your photo and said, "Take the globe and let me look at it again."

25. Men, be more loving to your wife, be kind to your children, be filial to your parents, be loyal to your friends, be careful with your work, and be ruthless to yourself. After reading this Please hit your head with the phone in your hand!

26. A cricket made a bet with a pig: If I jump into the grass, you can’t see me. The pig said: What if I can see you? So the cricket jumped into the grass. The pigs are watching, the pigs are watching! The pig is still watching! Why are the pigs still watching?

27. I have been your friend for so long. You have always cared about me, but I often cause you trouble. I really don’t know how to repay you. Therefore, I will definitely do anything in my next life. I will pull weeds for you to eat.

28. The most romantic thing is to walk slowly with you and watch the eighty-year-old man being gentle with the old lady on the roadside; the happiest thing is to walk slowly with you and watch Your cheerful gait is my enjoyment! My pet dog is running around again!

29. If being beautiful is a mistake, I have made a big mistake; if being smart is a sin, I have committed a heinous crime. Being a human being is really difficult. But you are fine, you are right and not guilty, I really envy you!

30. I really miss you! I call for dawn at night, and the stars in the sky understand my heart. There is only you in my heart! How can thousands of mountains and rivers block my love for you! I really miss you, my dear...RMB!

31. The weather is hot and cold. In this season, I feel calm and always miss you in the distance. I am willing to raise a homing pigeon and let it fly to you every day, even if all it can do is A simple action: shit on your head!

32. I haven’t seen you for a while, but I really miss you! How are you over there? Did the tiger bully you? Do lions scare you? Have tourists thrown anything at you? Are you used to holding your phone with two little hooves and reading text messages?

33. Thank you for being willing to listen to my complaints, because with you, I can get rid of all my unhappiness! Thank you for every minute and second you have walked with me. Because of you, my life is no longer lonely! Wangcai, I can no longer live without you in my life. Humorous and ridiculing words

Humorous and ridiculing words

1. You took a pig shopping and looked very happy. I passed by and said with sympathy: "It depends on a person's grade. It depends on who he is with." Before he finished speaking, that pig abandoned you with disdain!

2. You and I are both single-winged angels. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. It is said that people come to the world just to find their other half. I finally found you after all the hard work, but I found that Our wings are parallel to each other.

3. Occasional forgetfulness does not mean eternity. During the busy period, a faint longing lingers in my heart; during the lonely journey, please accept my ardent care and sincere blessings; I miss you, please let me Let’s eat!

4. From knowing you to this day, you should be very clear about your position in my heart. Except for you, everyone else is a pile of shit in my eyes, but you are different, because you are, two pieces of shit.

5. If being beautiful is a mistake, I have made a big mistake; if being smart is a sin, I have committed a heinous crime. Being a human being is really difficult.

But you are fine, you are right and not guilty, I really envy you!

6. Men, be kind to your wife, be kind to your children, be filial to your parents, be loyal to your friends, be careful with your work, and be ruthless to yourself. After reading this Please hit your head with the phone in your hand!

7. Top-secret document of the 16th National Congress: In order to improve the quality of the people, the State Council decided to eliminate a group of ugly and imbecile young people. You should immediately pack your things and go out to avoid them. Don’t thank me, leave quickly and pay attention to safety!

8. The weather is hot and cold. In this season, I feel calm and always miss you in the distance. I would like to raise a homing pigeon and let it fly to you every day, even if all it can do is A simple action: shit on your head!

9. I look forward to you every day and think about it every night, I think about it all the time, I focus on you during the day, and I meet you in my dreams at night. My thoughts are spinning around you, why haven’t you come to me yet - Five million!

10. In order to thank my friends for their love, we now provide a weekend one-day trip, with a full round trip by bus. The activities include cleaning the floors and kitchen oil stains in my house, scrubbing the toilet, washing clothes and bedding, and providing lunch for 210 people. , sign up as soon as possible!

11. On behalf of the Party Central Committee, the State Council, the National People's Congress, the Central Military Commission, and the Hong Kong, Macao and Taiwan Office, I would like to make a strong protest to you: Why is there no Taiwan in the map of China you left behind when you wet the bed last night? ! ! Remember to make up for it tonight.

12. A pair of fly mother and son were having a meal. The son frowned and asked his mother: "Mom, why do we eat poop every day?" The mother said: "Don't say such disgusting words while eating, hurry up Eat it while it’s hot! ”

13. One monk has to carry water to drink, and two monks have to carry water to drink. This classic story is unforgettable and deeply imprinted in my heart. Now, there is also a temple in the mountain, and there is also an old Taoist in the temple, but the old Taoist is holding a mobile phone and giggling.

14. A cheer awakens a dream! Say hello and dispel a bit of loneliness! A greeting warms a heart! A blessing and a feeling of concern! A word of "nothing" comforts a feeling of hesitation! A text message can wake up a pig!

15. A cricket made a bet with a pig: If I jump into the grass, you can’t see me. The pig said: What if I can see you? So the cricket jumped into the grass. The pigs are watching, the pigs are watching! The pig is still watching! Why are the pigs still watching?

16. Friendship is full of meaning to me. When you cry, I cry too. When you laugh, I laugh too. When you jump out of a tall building, I will stick my head out without hesitation. : "Wow, it would be strange not to die!"

17. Someone told me: sending text messages to the most talented, healthiest, most honest, and kindest people is the noblest thing; think about it. , I think this person must be you! If you feel the same way, please send me a reply!

18. I haven’t seen you for a while, but I really miss you! How are you over there? Did the tiger bully you? Do lions scare you? Have tourists thrown anything at you? Are you used to holding your phone with two little hooves and reading text messages?

19. Don’t be discouraged when you encounter setbacks. (Classic sentence) Work hard and don’t be discouraged. Strive to reach the top and have backbone. Avoid being upset and don’t be angry. Live an optimistic life. Don’t be discouraged. Where there are many people, don’t be discouraged. Son

20. I really miss you! I call for dawn at night, and the stars in the sky understand my heart. There is only you in my heart! How can thousands of mountains and rivers block my love for you! I really miss you, my dear...RMB!

21. The most romantic thing is to walk slowly with you and watch the eighty-year-old man being gentle with the old lady on the roadside; the happiest thing is to walk slowly with you and watch Your cheerful gait is my enjoyment! My pet dog is running around again!

22. With you, I forget to eat and sleep. Without you, I don’t think about food and drink. With you, my heart is concerned. Without you, I worry about gains and losses.

23. According to your birth date, you will definitely make a fortune in the near future. Please follow the tips immediately: get an explosive hairstyle, wear patched clothes, hold a stick in your right hand and a bowl in your left hand, walk along the street and Spell: OK, OK!

24. Except for the wind, no one will understand the sadness of this city; except for the rain, no one will see the end of this story; except for you, no one is worth letting me care about and follow. ;Dear, I want to say to you: It’s time to pay back the money!

25. Judging from your almond-shaped eyes, cherry mouth, curved eyebrows, slender hands, tall figure, charming curves, and pretty face, you must have had your whole body plastic surgery. Allow!

26. I can’t resist missing you. I can only use images to express my love. Don’t laugh at my obsession with you, just because of the wise saying--Whoever has no shit in life from ancient times keeps a photo. Make toilet paper!

27. Thank you for being willing to listen to my complaints, because with you, I can get rid of all my unhappiness! Thank you for every minute and second you have walked with me. Because of you, my life is no longer lonely! Wangcai, I can no longer live without you in my life.

28. I have been your friend for so long. You have always cared about me, but I often cause you trouble. I really don’t know how to repay you. Therefore, I will definitely do anything in my next life. I will pull weeds for you to eat.

29. Next is the moment to witness the miracle. Press the scroll button once and you will smile; press it twice and you will giggle; press it three times and you will laugh happily; press it four times and congratulations, A fool is born!

30. What to do if you are thirsty? Go to the beach for a walk; what should you do if you are hungry? Let’s have hot pot and shabu-shabu; what to do if you don’t have money? Find a fool to lie to you; what should you do if you don’t have the guts? Go to the cemetery to practice; what if I miss you? So send a text message and give it a try.

31. Without Pangu, there would be no chance of ape evolution; without oracle bones as stationery, history would be lifeless; without Daiyu and Baoyu, how could the Red Mansion be passed down for centuries? Without me sending you a message, who knew a pig could look at a cell phone?

32. Starting tomorrow, the city will decide to get rid of all the mentally handicapped young people who are ugly and detract from the appearance of the city! Pack your things quickly and go out to avoid the limelight. Don't tell anyone that I informed you. Remember! No need to say thank you!

33. When I met God that day, he promised me a wish. I said I hoped for world peace, but he said it was too difficult to handle. I took out your photo and hoped that He would make you more beautiful. God took your photo and said, "Take the globe and let me look at it again." Humorously poking fun at women and emotions

1. Female: You are the only loser who wants a house but no house, and wants money but no money, but you also want to take advantage of me. Are you worthy?

Diaosi: There is no such thing as deservingness or unworthiness in the world. A lighter worth one yuan can still light a cigarette worth tens of thousands of yuan.

A banquet worth tens of thousands of yuan cannot be separated from a pack of salt worth two yuan.

2. The man said to the woman: Even if you want the stars in the sky, I will pick them for you!

The woman said: That. . . Where do I want the sun?

Male:. . . Uh, you lie down first. . .

3. I was chatting with my girlfriend last night and she said it was so cold.

I asked how cold it was?

She said: Her breasts were stiff from the cold. . .

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Humorously ridicules women and emotions

1. Research shows that women in the fog The ability to drive in haze is higher than that of men. This is due to the fact that they usually drive without looking at the road!

2. The feeling of loving someone is: you will care about everything, but you can forgive everything.

3. When I saw a young couple quarreling over trivial matters, I suddenly felt that being single was pretty good,

I could do whatever I wanted. . . Except for girlfriends.

4. If you want to chase a girl, send her a message every night to go to bed early.

If you persist for at most three years, you will succeed. If you want to break up with a girl, call her and get up early every morning.

If you persist for three months at most, you will succeed.