First, you must be upright and aboveboard. Confucius believed: "People are born upright, and they are spared the consequences of being reckless." ("Yong Ye") In Confucius' view, a person must be upright, and only uprightness can be aboveboard. However, dishonest people can survive in our lives, but only by luck and avoid disaster. According to the logical reasoning of the development of things, people who rely on luck to avoid disasters will fall into trouble sooner or later.

Second, we must pay attention to "benevolence" in life. This is one of the issues that Confucius emphasized most on how to be a good person. In Confucius' view, benevolence is the foundation of life and comes first. Confucius said: "When a disciple enters, he is filial, and when he leaves, he is a younger brother. He is sincere and trustworthy, loves others universally, and is benevolent. If you have enough energy to do, study literature." ("Xueer") He also said: "People who are not benevolent are like What is the etiquette? What kind of happiness is there if a person is not benevolent?" ("Eight Yi") This shows that it is meaningful to study etiquette and music only on the basis of benevolence. Confucius also believed that only benevolent people can treat others selflessly and be praised by people. Confucius said: "Only the benevolent can do good to others and do evil to others." ("Li Ren") "Qi Jinggong had thousands of horses. On the day of his death, the people were praised for their lack of virtue. Boyi and Shuqi died of starvation under Shou Yang, and the people came to It is called today." ("Ji Shi") fully illustrates the value and power of benevolence.

So how can we be considered benevolent? Yan Yuan asked about benevolence, and Confucius said: "Restraining oneself and returning to propriety is benevolence. For one day to restrain oneself and return to propriety, the world will return to benevolence." ("Yan Yuan") In other words, only by restraining oneself and making words and deeds conform to propriety is benevolence. Once your words and deeds comply with etiquette, people in the world will praise you as a benevolent person. It can be seen that "benevolence" is not innate, but the result of acquired "cultivation" and "self-denial". Of course, Confucius also put forward the external standard of benevolence, which is "hardness, perseverance, wood, and restraint are close to benevolence." ("Zilu") That is, a person who is strong, decisive, simple, and modest in speech is close to benevolence. At the same time, he also proposed five standards for practicing benevolence, namely: "respect, tolerance, trustworthiness, sensitivity, and benefit" ("Yang Huo"). That is, respect, generosity, faithfulness, diligence, and kindness. He said that if you are respectful to others, you will not be insulted, if you are kind to others, you will gain everyone's support, if you are trustworthy in your dealings, others will trust you, if you work diligently, you will be successful, and if you are kind to others, you will be able to handle people well. Confucius said that those who can practice these five virtues can be regarded as benevolent.

Of course, in Confucius’ view, it is extremely difficult to fully achieve benevolence. Therefore, the way he teaches people to pursue benevolence is to "be knowledgeable in literature and use etiquette to make appointments, and you can live with your husband!" ("Yan Yuan") That is, study cultural classics extensively and use etiquette to restrain your behavior. In this way Then you don’t have to deviate from the right path. At the same time, we should also pay attention to learning from benevolent people and use benevolent people to help cultivate benevolence. A virtuous person should be able to stand up for himself and make others stand up, to help others achieve what they want to achieve, and to be able to push others forward in everything they do. That is to say: "If you want to establish yourself, you can establish others; if you want to achieve something, you can achieve others. Being able to draw examples from close friends can be said to be the way of benevolence." ("Yong Ye")

Thirdly, as a person, you must pay attention to the all-round development of self-cultivation. . Zeng Zi said: "I have to reflect on myself three times every day: Have I been unfaithful in my plans for others? Have I not believed in my friends? Have I learned to teach others?" ("Xue Er") That is to say: I have to reflect on myself over and over again every day: Are I helping others with things? Have you tried your best? Are you trustworthy when interacting with friends? Have you reviewed the studies taught by the teacher? Emphasize the importance of cultivating moral character from oneself. On this basis, Confucius emphasized that a person should also pay attention to all-round development. Confucius said: "Aspirations are based on Tao, based on virtue, based on benevolence, and wandering in art." ("Shu'er") That is: the ambition is based on Tao, the basis is based on virtue, the basis is based on benevolence, and the activities are based on the six arts (ritual, music, Shooting, imperialism, calligraphy, and arithmetic), only in this way can we truly be a human being. So why did Confucius emphasize that a person should develop in an all-round way? This reflects Confucius's understanding of human sociality and the mutual restraint of personal cultivation. He said: "It is based on poetry, established on etiquette, and achieved on music." ("Taibo") That is, poetry can inspire people's emotions. Spirit and etiquette can strengthen people's sentiments, and music can promote the success of people's careers. Therefore, for personal cultivation, all-round development is extremely important.