A: I am funny, he is flattering
B: We are partners
A: The following is a paragraph for everyone The traditional cross talk is called Lun Peng Dou, performer Jia Ling, thank you for this cross talk. .
B: What about me?
A: Aren’t you here?
B: Why didn’t you repay me when I was here?
A: Hug? Hug you? You want me to hug you in front of all these people?
B: What? What I’m saying is that when you reported the actor’s name just now, you didn’t report it to me.
A: Oh, you’re such a compliment, why do you still need to report it?
B: How fresh
A: OK, OK, let’s start over. What follows is a traditional cross talk, performed by Jia Ling and others
B: I've been waiting for a long time, and I'm still waiting. No, why are I waiting?
A: Don't forget that I am teasing you, and you are the one who admires me.
B: I don’t even have a name as a flatterer
A: Ouch, you are a complimenter, how can I compare to you?
B : Where does ratio come from?
A: You are deaf ears - match the match, marry a wife and play flags - join in the fun
B: Let everyone listen to what this is called, there is a saying that is good , red flowers need green leaves as lining
A: Are you the only one who still has green leaves? It’s just a rotten vegetable leaf
B: No, if my leaf is a rotten vegetable leaf, then your flower is just a popcorn
A: Oh, you’re the only one holding it, Dare you talk to Douche like that?
B: Oops, there is a famous saying in our cross talk circle, which is called 30% funny and 70% flattering. I hope I can have sex with you
A: 30% funny and 70% flattering. What do you mean?
B: That is to say, you, the funny one, account for 30%, and I, the flattering one, account for 70%
A: Let’s put it this way, we, the funny ones, account for 99.9% %, your praise accounts for 0.1%.
B: Still weak?
A: You are just a layer of distilled water
B: If you want to talk like this, we are 100% flattering. You have no distilled water, you have nothing, you have nothing at all. Just
A: No, why do you look so anxious?
B: Can I not be in a hurry? You look down on me so much
A: Didn’t I just kid you?
B: I was kidding
A: You can’t leave, my little red flower has to rely on your rotten vegetable leaves. . How about your big green leaves?
B: Oh, let’s put it this way, today my big green leaves will definitely set off your popcorn. .
No, little red flower
A: Let’s continue acting
B: Act
A: But if we have to act again, we can’t act like we did just now
B: Ouch, how should we act?
A: It depends on what the audience likes to watch
B: What does everyone like to watch?
A: Let me ask you first, what do your family members like to watch?
B: Our families all have different preferences. My mother likes to watch romantic dramas, and my father likes to watch martial arts movies. Especially my wife likes to watch Korean dramas. They are all so different that it is difficult to agree on them
A: Not necessarily. Today we are going to do a live show in front of so many audience friends, with new tricks to satisfy friends of all tastes
B: How can you be satisfied
p>A: Let’s make fun of the discussion just now and interpret it into various versions
B: What versions are there?
A: What did you just say? What does your mother like to watch?
B: Romantic dramas, especially Qiong Yao’s ones
A: Then let’s do a Qiong Yao version of Lun Peng Tiao
B: Qiong Yao’s version of Lun Peng Tiao?
A: Qiong Yao’s version can’t be called Lun Peng Tiao
B: Should it be called then?
A: The compliments deeply amuse Mengmeng
B: It sounds quite poetic, let’s try this feeling, okay?
A: Let’s both Let’s play again
B: Come on
A: Let’s play again
(Love is deep and rainy music plays)
A: Wow, isn't this my brother?
B: Aren’t you my sister?
A: Uh-huh
B: How did you come here?
A: Yes, I came here to perform
B: What a coincidence, I’m here to perform too
A: But, I’m here to make fun of you, and you’re here to praise me
B: Is it true that praise is just a matter of praise? Isn't it important anymore?
A: Brother, please, please don’t argue with me, okay?
B: It’s not good
A: Well, since this is the case, let’s show it off. On the stage, I am a little red flower, and you are just a mess. Just vegetable leaves
B: What, you, how can you be like this, you can't be like this
A: Then what should I do?
B: If I’m a rotten vegetable, then you’re a popcorn
A: That’s enough! I don’t want you to teach me a lesson, you damn 38
B: What are you talking about? Are you calling me 38? Wrong, I am not 38, not 38, but 37. Haven’t you heard of the saying, 30% of the time you are funny and 70% of the praise?
A: Why are you trying to get in trouble with me? Why? You want to deceive your own conscience, why can you only be a compliment?
B: Why why, tell me why
A: Okay, I know, you always like to tease in your heart
B: I have Tell me
A: Stop deceiving yourself. Whether you admit it or not, your eyes have betrayed your heart, do you know? But if you like to tease, it's just wishful thinking, because you don't deserve it, you only deserve to be a compliment
B: No, no, this is not true, you are talking nonsense and nonsense
A: Calm down (knock B down)
B: Wait a minute, why are you still beating people
A: No, isn’t this Qiong Yao’s version, it seems more sensational
B: You slap your mouth for being sensational, you
A: Qiong Yao, why don’t you make some sacrifices for Qiong Yao Mini
B: No, I am easily hurt by you. Do you have any other version? How about we change it to one
A: OK, what do you want to change it to?
B: Then change it to one that my dad likes to watch
A: He likes to watch it What is it
B: A martial arts movie
A: Then let’s do a Jin Yong version of Lun Peng Tiao
>B: Jin Yong’s version of Lun Peng Tiao? What should it be called?
A: It’s called Stage Hero Legend: Praising Evil and Poisoning
B: Oh, it doesn’t sound easy to offend, so let’s see what it feels like
A: Play again
B: Come
(The music starts)
A: Who is it
B: This is not Leader of the Ping Nie Clan, are you kidding me to be a hero?
A: Who do I think I am? It turns out to be the leader of the Peng Nie Clan, a hero with bad feet. What do you want from me today?
p>B: I heard that the leader of Dou Gang was rude to us, so I came here today to ask for justice
A: Yes, this is what I said. In our martial arts world, you These compliments are just side followers and rotten leaves. Only by making fun of us can we be called martial arts heroes
B: But someone asked me to give you a message
A: What are you talking about?
B: The general trend in the martial arts today is that one-third of the time is funny and seven-pointed is support. Your teasing gang is just expired popcorn
A: Okay, let’s give in today I'm here to teach you a lesson like a rotten vegetable
B: I didn't expect you to be so heartless. Today I want to clean up the martial arts world, please take action
A: Then don't Blame me for being rude, overwhelming (knocking down B)
B: Stop, stop, stop
A: Why did you stop again
B: Why do I always suffer?
A: You are not happy with this version either. What do you want?
B: You just have to change to a version where I don’t get beaten. Is there any more
A: Then let’s change to the one your wife likes to watch, the Korean drama version of Lun Peng Dou
B: The Korean drama version of Lun Peng Dou?
A: Yes
B: What should this be called?
A: Call it my savage tease
B: No, I will get beaten again after hearing this name. This is not okay, you have to act like a lady in Korean dramas. I won’t get beaten up
A: Okay, okay, now please enjoy Dae Jang Geum’s version of Peng Dou, which is called Peng La La Dou La La
B: I see. This trip
A: Come on again
B: Come
(Dae Jang Geum’s music starts, the two dance Korean dance)
A and B kneel down, A: #¥@......amp;
B: @# You speak Chinese, who can understand this?
A: I am Dou Ni~~
B: I am Peng Ni~~
A: I am Honghua~~
B: I am a green leaf~~
A: You are a rotten vegetable leaf~~
B: You are a popcorn~~
(Both stand up )
B: Changjin, please remember that three points of teasing and seven points of support
A: Sir, are you talking about three points of fun and seven points of support? Are you talking about the legendary three points of teasing and seven points of support?
B: Yes, Janggeum, this is the legendary three-point tease and seven-point support
A: Are you really talking about the legendary three-point tease and seven-point support?
B: Yes, Janggeum, this is really the legendary Three-Point Dou-Qi.
A: Really? Sir, then why is it called Three-Point Dou-Qi? What about the cents
B: Yes, Janggeum, because it is composed of three points and seven points
A: I have never thought of hurting anyone. It's funny, I've been walking on the path I should take, but now I feel like I can't hold on anymore, I can't stand it anymore.
It was because of the admiration thing and the fact that we were partners together that brought me to this point, but sir, do you think it’s okay to treat Jang Geum like this? Do you really think it doesn't matter? Do you really think it doesn't matter? If you do this again, I will sever ties with you
B: You should sever ties with me. It will be more uncomfortable for you to act like this than to hit me just now
A: Really? Is this true? Are you really, really upset? But what does this have to do with me?
B: I beg you, I can’t stand it anymore
A: Really? Is this true? Are you really unable to take it anymore? But what does this have to do with me?
B: Can I stop talking about this cross talk?
A: Really? Is this true? Are you really not talking about cross talk? But what does this have to do with me?
B: Help
A: Do you want to die? Really? Is this true? Are you really desperate for your life?
B: Really!
A: But what does this have to do with me?
Male, I am a bird. A bird that looks like a human, but definitely not a bird. This year is the Spring Festival Gala of the Year of the Rabbit. I am called Bugs Bunny. My biggest dream is to be on the stage to welcome the new year, but My master, her dreams, her dreams always disturb me. She often dreams. When she dreams, she always takes me with her. In her dreams, she doesn’t let me say a word. Everyone, look at her coming
Every woman Well, today I want to tell you my story. Some women like to dream. Some women chatter all day long. Some women are silly and naive. And I am exactly the kind of woman who likes to dream and chatter all day long. I have been a silly and naive woman since I was a child. She is just an ordinary girl. When I was little, everyone called me the Ugly Duckling. When I grew up, everyone called me Cinderella, whose nickname is Hui Hui. Oh, and I have always dreamed of meeting the Prince Charming in my heart. Finally one day, I had such an opportunity. I took Little Red Riding Hood and put on the glass slippers to attend the night banquet hosted by the prince. My dancing finally impressed the prince. But when I looked up at the watch, it was already 12 o'clock in the middle of the night. My mother told me to rush back before midnight to take the taxi and run home. Because Zou's wife was too late. In such a hurry, I actually lost one of my glass slippers! ! ! My shoe~~~What should I do if I change it? Fortunately, the prince cut off my shoe. In order to find me, the prince asked girls from all over the country to try on this shoe. After going through many rounds of auditions and the final selection, I finally got my wish. After winning the championship, the prince took me into the palace. But after entering the palace, I found that the prince was not interested in me at all. I really felt so bored. Finally one day, I found that the whole city was filled with golden armor. It happened a kilometer away. There was a coup, the queen usurped the throne, and she killed the prince again~~~ She killed the princess again. "Misery" Oh my god~~~ Just when he wanted to kill me, an accident happened. No, I know whose money is most at stake. At that moment, a 5 cent coin was enough for me, but I knew the queen would never let me go. She returned to the palace and put various poses in front of the magic mirror. "Cai Ming" Magic Mirror, Magic Mirror, tell me who is The most beautiful woman in the world laughed wildly, but the magic mirror said that she was Sister Furong on the Internet and Huihui in the kingdom. So the queen chased me everywhere and I hid in a forest. There I unexpectedly met seven dwarfs. I lived a happy life with the dwarfs, but I knew the queen would never let me go. She dressed up as an old grandmother and ran into the forest. While walking, she talked about the troubles she had in the past, eating apples one bite at a time, and now she is gone. One bite of the latest upgraded version of the apple is better than five bites. The highly nutritious apple flavor is very effective. Hahahaha. I couldn’t resist the temptation and took one bite of the apple. Then I passed out and turned into Sleeping Beauty. I don’t know how long it took. A hero named Guo Jing passed by me when he was wandering around. He used sunflower acupuncture hands to help me unblock the acupuncture points. I woke up and Guo Daxia asked me if you were my Rong'er. I said "Sing", I am not,, love, but Guo Jing was right I said hahaha. Do you like green peppers?
I want to be an animated superman, haha. Why is there Huang Zhihua's version of Guo Jing, and Zhang Chi Wing's version of Guo Jing? And I met a Crayon Shin-chan version of Guo Jing. We boarded a ship called Titanic together. On the ship, we learned that beauty and wisdom are equally important. Tang Bohu, the incarnation of hero and chivalry, male haha ??female Tang Bohu male hahaha female Tang, male hide, we meet each other late, we talk about everything, we ride the wind and waves together to the other side of happiness "Titanic Style Interlude" Suddenly the ship sank I bumped into an iceberg Bohu,,, Bohu helped me climb up a wooden board Bohu, come up, come up! Bohu applied to hide from me and said "Northeastern Dialect" Ash, don't be stupid. I usually ask you to lose weight but you won't lose it. Just you. I was so good with this physique. After saying that, Bohu sank to the bottom. I was floating, floating, hungry and tired. At this time, a person came over. She gave me a piece of donkey meat for roasting. Thank you. In return, I married this roasting guy. Vendor, this is our wedding photo, eggplant. Is this the marriage I want? Finally one day, a handsome guy passed by my window in "The Scream" Ximen Daguan!!!!hahaha In order to attract Qingzai's attention, I came from I picked up a guy behind me and hit Qingzi on the head without any bias. I saw Ximen Qing covering his head and said to me coolly: Pan Jinlian threw a bamboo pole, but you actually threw a shovel... It's all over and I'm dead. I got into trouble again. I don’t know who dialed 110. The one standing to my right was the king. The one standing to my left was the prince. The one standing in front was the queen. Oh my god~~~The one standing behind was the princess~~~~~~~~ ! ! ! I gritted my teeth and stomped my feet and jumped out of the window. I heard a "clunk" sound and fell off the bed. It turned out to be a TV serial dream. This is my dream. I believe everyone here has their own dream. Huh? Bugs Bunny, you have dreams too, right? What is your dream? Oh, tell me, what is your dream?
Male, if you really can go to the Spring Festival Gala, can you let me say something~! ! !
Oh, this is all what I heard and typed. I’m so tired. You have to perform well