Why do children who have just entered primary school from kindergarten have so many problems? What can be done to help children adapt to primary school life quickly? This is the topic I am talking with you today: all for the children.
1. Changes faced by children in the connection between childhood and childhood
Children in the connection between kindergarten and primary school usually face six problems:
1. Changes in teacher-student relationship:
In kindergarten, teachers take more care of children's lives, and the relationship between teachers and children becomes a kind of family relationship. The requirements for children in learning activities are relatively simple, and children's learning activities are very relaxed and enjoyable.
But entering primary school is different. Teachers and parents have very high expectations for their children's learning, which makes them have a certain pressure and burden. Because the primary school teacher wants to complete the teaching task, she should focus on teaching, and have less opportunities to care about students' life. The communication between teachers and students is mainly in the classroom, and the time for individual contact between teachers and students is very small, so the new children may not adapt.
2. Changes in classroom teaching < P > In kindergarten, games are the main activity mode of kindergarten education, and what is advocated is to play while learning.
In primary schools, it is a formal classroom teaching method, which focuses on written language, emphasizing systematic education of cultural knowledge and training of basic skills such as reading, writing and calculation. The break and game time are very short. Children are faced with classroom teaching of four classes in the morning and two classes in the afternoon every day, and they have to complete a certain amount of homework after class.
3. Changes in behavior norms
In kindergartens, children have many time and rights to choose their own activities. The head teacher of our school will conduct special code of conduct training. )
4. Changes in interpersonal relationships
After children enter primary school, they are separated from their peers who get along with each other day and night in kindergarten and come to a new environment. This requires re-establishing new interpersonal relationships, making new friends on their own initiative and integrating into the new class atmosphere as soon as possible.
5. Changes in expectations of parents and teachers
Parents and teachers mainly consider their children's nutrition, mental health, mental health. Once a child enters primary school, the expectations of parents and teachers will change greatly. In addition to hoping that the child will be healthy and happy, he hopes that the child will have excellent academic performance. In order to study, the time for children to play games and watch TV will be reduced.
6. Intersection of learning environment
When entering primary school, the free, lively and free learning environment in early childhood is transformed into a learning environment with subjects, homework and teachers' control. If children can't adapt to this environment quickly, it is easy for them to have learning disabilities.
Therefore, solving these problems is the key to make a good connection between young and old.
Due to these changes, it is normal for children to have some maladjustments after entering primary school. We parents should treat them correctly, patiently and meticulously help their children get through the transition stage from childhood, and make them adapt to primary school life quickly.
second, what preparations should parents make in the connection between children and young children
The connection between children and young children is not only a matter for kindergartens and primary schools, but also influenced by family and social factors. Among them, the role of parents can not be ignored. Because children's living habits, self-care ability, physical quality, learning attitude and ability, and social adaptability are all inseparable from their parents' words and deeds. Parents are their first teachers. (Public service advertisement: A child's mother washed her mother's feet, and the child took the initiative to bring water to wash her mother's feet when she saw it. When the childish little boy said "Mother washed her feet", I don't know how many parents in the world were touched. This is a model of teaching by example.)
1. Psychological preparation
(1) Overcoming anxiety. The anxiety of new parents is often caused by paying too much attention to their children's enrollment. Children are going to primary school, which is a very important and common thing in the process of their growth. Most children will adapt smoothly with the help of teachers and parents, so parents should not worry too much. In addition, our primary school life is rich and colorful, and there are many colorful activities, which are far from being as boring and hard as imagined. Parents should not give their children too much negative reinforcement of "hard work". Learning should be a kind of happiness, and parents should tell their children with their own relaxed mood that primary school study and life is pleasant and worth yearning for.
(2) keep up with the joneses. Due to the fierce competition, colleagues and friends will inevitably compare their children's schools and teachers. Parents should carefully grasp the scale of comparison. Otherwise, it is easy to cause psychological imbalance, and the so-called distance produces beauty. What you get is always not as good as what you can't get. Believe in your own judgment and choice, which will lay a good foundation for children and parents to integrate into school culture faster and better in the future.
(3) know how to appreciate. Children are going to primary school, and entering a new environment will inevitably lead to many obstacles. Instead of nagging about him all day, it is better to observe and appreciate his progress from little details, give him a support and confidence, and let such confidence encourage him to solve more and more difficult problems himself. (praise should be specific. If you praise your child's progress, don't say it in general, but specifically what he has improved, such as: your handwriting is really beautiful, you really love working, the teacher praises you for listening to a lot of people, and so on. Give children the right direction. He will know how to do it and do it better in the future. )
(4) Wait patiently. There are differences among children, such as heredity, age, gender, family education and so on. Parents can't expect their children to be all right, no one is perfect, let alone children. Otherwise, you will only see the shortcomings of your children. For children's shortcomings, parents should not only persevere in guiding, but also wait patiently. The growth of children needs a process. It takes ten years to grow trees, but it takes a hundred years to cultivate people.
(5) Pay attention to interpersonal communication. Parents lay a good foundation for education by establishing a good parent-child relationship with their children. Parents should pay special attention to getting along with their children and cultivate their interpersonal skills by example. If children are required to be polite, parents should also respect and be polite to others; Parents should first ask their children to care about and help others. In short, parents who ask their children to do it must first do it. Only in this way can children quickly like primary school teachers and classmates, thus enjoying learning and primary school life.
In addition, parents should chat with their children more often, especially in the first month of their new school, so as to help their children understand the school correctly and know that primary schools are places for learning. Pupils are mainly engaged in learning, doing homework, taking exams and studying hard, so as to gain something and become an excellent pupil.
(7) Effective communication:
Educating children depends on communication 8% and guidance 2%. First, parents should make clear the purpose of communication:
1. Satisfy children's desire to be understood.
2. show care and give spiritual encouragement.
3. release the pressure.
4. Guide correctly.
communication methods:
1. Learn to understand, respect and get along with children on an equal footing
When I was teaching grade one, a parent in our class told her that her children were a headache because she always didn't want to do what she asked her children to do, or even if she did, she was reluctant. I asked her how to get her children to do things. She said that at home, she often said, "Go, bring the cup." "Bring the newspaper." "Go and do your homework." I suggest that she might as well change her way of speaking when she asks the children to do something again: help mom get the cup, will you? "",I believe it would be much better to change the tone of the order to the tone of euphemistic discussion. Later, the parent did this, and the child really became willing to do things. "Bring the cup." And "help mom get the cup, will you?" Two sentences sound similar to adults, but children's feelings are very different. Although children are young, they also don't like imperative tone, but like being entrusted. "Being entrusted" will make children feel respected and needed, which is one of the basic psychological needs of people, and so will children. When a person is respected and needed, his heart is warm, safe and relaxed, which can well narrow the psychological distance between people. Therefore, when parents ask their children to do something, as the nurturers of children, if it is always difficult to forget their role as "educators" and condescending, it will be difficult to maintain an equal position when communicating with children. It can be seen that only by understanding and respecting children can we truly live in equality and harmony.
What children don't like to hear:
Why are you so stupid? If you don't study well, don't think about anything good.
You lazy bastard, you never do anything for me. What's the use of learning music well?
If I get 1 points in the exam, I will give you 1 yuan to study. Don't worry about other things.
Children's favorite words:
Be brave, children, it doesn't matter if you make mistakes, as long as you correct it, you are still a good boy.
Children, the teacher praised you for listening carefully in class. Mom is so happy for you.
Your handwriting is correct, clean and beautiful. That's great. You are a good boy.
"You are a good boy" is a favorite sentence for children.
Parents are willing to give their children all the good things in the world, but think about it carefully, have we given him this sentence that children like to hear most?
Man is an animal who likes to be loved and understood by others. Children whose hearts are as transparent and fragile as glass need our care and appreciation more. For children, it is important to have the spirit of self-confidence and self-love. This spirit is like the root of a plant. The deeper and wider it is, the greater the fruit will be.
a word can change a child's life!
So how should parents communicate with their children when they come home from a day of school? I often hear some parents say that when I go home, I just ask: Have you finished your homework? Are there any wrong questions? Can such a question arouse the children's favor? Son, is he willing to communicate with you? He'll think you look like a policeman. I suggest that parents should start with the following questions in order to really communicate effectively with their children:
1. What good things did you see at school today? (positive guidance)
2. What did you do well in school? (praise in time)
3. What did you gain today? (encourage in time)
4. Is there anything I can do for my mother? (eliminate psychological pressure)
2. Learn to listen and learn to tell the truth
When parents communicate with their children, they often only care about "speaking freely", which is actually blocking their children's ears or shutting them up. If it develops, it will become a common mistake-preaching, and it is empty preaching. Children also have a desire to communicate, and they also want their words to be listened to well.
Whenever a child talks to his parents, parents should put down what they are doing as much as possible and concentrate on what the child is saying, which can make the child feel that the parents care about listening to him, and the child feels respected and encouraged, and will be willing to express his feelings. This is parent-child communication. Communication between parents and children is very important, but in this kind of communication, we should pay attention to one thing as parents: talk less and listen more.
being good at listening doesn't mean blindly accommodating and letting go without criticism and education. When talking to children, parents should be good at accurately conveying their inner thoughts and wishes to children, so that children can feel the care and goodwill contained in their parents' "criticism" and "education" and avoid causing children's resistance. It's better to tell children a story that explains the truth than to criticize them. Introduce the series of books, such as Little Story, Chicken Soup for the Soul, 1 Stories that Touched Primary School Students, and so on.
3. Learn to hug and whisper
Have you ever seen such an article "Have you hugged and whispered?" It says: "In the hug, people can get a sense of security and trust, which is a whole-hearted rest. Anxiety can be alleviated and calmed down. People are the most rational when they are emotionally and psychologically stable. " "Whispering is more convincing and more touching than the expression at normal volume. Because only the whispering gesture has already indicated a special intimate relationship between the two. "
Most parents love their children deeply, but because the way we express our feelings in China is still a little implicit, this kind of love for our children is often manifested in material things, rather than spiritual care. For children, especially those who have just entered school, we should always use language, movements, expressions and gestures to let children feel the love of their parents. Especially when the child encounters difficulties and setbacks, put your hand on the child's shoulder, look him (her) in the eyes and say to him, "No matter what happens, mom and dad love you, and we know you can do it!" When a child is rewarded for his progress or achievements, he should give a thumbs-up and sincerely praise the child: "Son, you are really the pride of your mother. Well done!" You know, it is such a seemingly casual action, and a simple sentence will bring great comfort and warmth to the child's mind. (Educating people should cultivate the mind)
2. Preparation for learning < P > It is not those children who lack knowledge before entering school that make teachers feel headache at school, but those children who are not interested in learning at all and do not like to think. How to make your children knowledgeable, interested and capable? I think it is necessary for us to understand the necessary abilities and qualities in learning. If children have these abilities and qualities, they will greatly promote learning.
(1) Cultivate children's listening ability. Good listening will be an important guarantee for children's high-quality learning efficiency in the future. Therefore, parents should pay special attention to cultivating children's listening habits in their daily communication with their children.