Most of us are secretive about our attitude towards life and death. When you are young and curious, you don't know what is innate. When we grow up, we have to face the elders getting old or even leaving. More often, we all hold the most ideal state, and they will accompany us all our lives. But when death is inevitable and comes as scheduled, we often suffer a heavy emotional blow without preparation.
A long time ago, I thought that death would only appear in memories, only in the news, and probably not around.
What we often see is that these are a little far from us, and now they will appear more in the reading comprehension of textbooks and Chinese exams. Some poems are used to chant ambition, some essays mourn or record one's life, and some works miss the past.
And these life and death never seem to appear in our lives.
The first episode of the second season, the topic of life and death, let us feel life and death in the form of letters, so far away, but so close.
The two sides of communication are far apart. In order to exchange feelings and thoughts, they wrote these letters, long or short. Regardless of the location, distance, postage and other restrictions, both sides hope to let the other side directly understand their thoughts and feelings.
It indirectly determines that letters may not have so many fancy languages, or not so many emotional essays or literary competitions, but more is to let you understand, not only the literal meaning, but also the joys and sorrows between the lines.
Life and death, between the lines of this letter, have also become simple.
Disasters, unexpected troubles ... these unexpected scenes of life and death arrival, life and death just crossed the line. On the line of life and death, everyone is the same, waiting for the arrival of the final fate, but in the end, some people live and some people die.
No matter life or death, it is sad.
"Why did I (you) survive?" People who survived, even if not questioned by others or relatives and friends of the deceased, will constantly remind themselves of that moment and ask themselves why I survived.
And this kind of guilt, even if it is not the weight of life and death, often lurks in our lives. When I was particularly poor, I didn't know how to support myself at all, but my mother was burdened with a heavier burden than her peers. At that time, she will doubt herself. Would she be better off without my burden?
What's more, facing the fate of life and death, this MISS ZHOU may be even more painful. Why did my cousin, who knew how to swim, leave, and I, a person who can't swim at all, survived? I don't want to die, but I am more afraid to face such a lonely life. I want to be accused of a self-incriminating life that is not my responsibility.
When the will to live arises, I am so eager to live; And when people I know around me passed away one after another in the same disaster, but I survived alone, I felt extremely guilty. Why, I'm still alive. What's wrong with my desire to live? If I die, will I not have to face those who care about each other and are silent? Perhaps, they will ask me in their hearts, "Why aren't you dead?"
I am eager to live, and I am constantly criticizing "why am I not dead, why am I still alive?" I am out of breath for the crush of life and death.
I want to live, and I really survived. But:
"What can I do to comfort her?"
This is a special letter.
A letter to my son who committed suicide a year later.
A letter that expresses the most complicated feelings in the simplest language.
A letter is neither "white-haired people cry black-haired people" nor "I haven't seen the last time", nor "I was sorry for many things before my death". It is neither nor a letter from a father to his son.
See this sentence, the first reaction is a subconscious retort, after careful aftertaste, aftertaste, is bitter and helpless, but also more distressed to admit-
Yes, mom was born to cook.
Or to put it another way, my mother has been sheltering me from the wind and rain since I was born.
In my impression, my mother seldom shed tears. She has always been a strict mother in my heart, and she has never spoiled me according to the usual understanding.
When I first left home to study, I was too weak to face it. I hugged her and cried. She was still holding the ledger and the old calculator in her hand. She worked over and over again, patting my back and laughing at me in a low voice. "What a shame to cry like this!" But when she said this, I secretly looked up at her and found.
It turns out that my mother has always been the pillar of my life. It turns out that my mother was born to give us free physical and mental support.
With their strength, with their unspeakable loneliness, with their extremely strong heart for difficulties.
Most of us work far away, and every time we talk on the phone, it seems to give each other a beautiful lie and the motivation to continue to support. My mother knows that I will go home for dinner on holidays, and she will tell me that my family will always be fine, not letting us know that they are cold and lonely, watching TV alone, playing computer silently and eating simple meals every day; So do we. We go out early and come back late. When we step on the stars and go back to the humble rental house every day, we will tell them with a smile, I am fine, I work well and I am in good health. Don't worry.
Because we can still care about each other, we still have such strong obsession and hope that we can be together one day.
And one day, it is also the driving force that supports us to run around in life under various difficulties. But it's so sad that life and death seem to be each other's bottom line in the distance.
It seems that only by touching or approaching such a bottom line can we push each other to cross such a geographical distance and be together regardless of life or death.
How much love can I have?
Aunt Qiong precious jade wrote in this letter to her children:
This is the latest letter we can read about how to deal with our own life and death, and it can also be said to be an open will.
Aunt Qiong Yao stood on the leading role in the choice between life and death, hoping to die with dignity at the end of her life, and choose nature without too much physical pain and torture, without intubation and surgery. ...
She wants to choose her own death.
And this kind of death is not an escape or a prevarication. When it is inevitable, I hope to face it according to my own wishes.
More than a year ago, I saw a similar debate about life and death in The Seven Overlords. "The terminally ill patients in pain want to give up their lives. Should I encourage him to stick to it? "
Teacher Gao condensed this topic into a discussion of "free will" and "quality of life".
Teacher Cai Kangyong said from another angle, "We should practice and learn to say goodbye to this matter", because life can't stay.
Teacher Ma Dong said that three years after his father died, he dreamed that his father said goodbye to him. "I am very happy to be a father and son with you for life, and we are destined to meet again." His interpretation of the dream is that this dream released himself subconsciously.
There were many discussions about life and death at the scene, such as Uncle Insect's "Don't chase" and Uncle Police's "We are not qualified to convince others because we are not experienced people". ...
As for me, it suddenly occurred to me that in a novel I read a long time ago, there was such a description in Muyuan's Sleeping Rabbit:
I don't know what kind of life and death we will face in the future, and I don't know how we will look at life and death. Maybe we don't have time to think at all. Our feelings dominate all of us.
However, this kind of mood is similar to wanting to stay with the closest person and accompany him (her).
Maybe I will keep you and advise you to stick to it; May support your decision, let you quietly, without too much pain, and face it with your own dignity; Maybe I will silently endure the sadness of separation in my heart and tell myself "stop chasing"; Maybe I'll be happy to say goodbye to you, let you go and let me go by myself. I'm glad that we have a lifelong fate and are destined to meet again. ...
I don't know how to face farewell, and I hardly even think about the distance between life and death.
Between the lines, we listen, appreciate and think.