Selected jokes:

1. A child stole a parrot raised in a brothel and took it home. As soon as he entered the door, the parrot screamed: Moving! When he saw his mother, he yelled again: The boss has changed too! When he saw his sister, he shouted again: "The lady has changed too!" When he saw his father, he yelled again: We are still a regular customer!

2. There was an American, a German, a Japanese and a Chinese on a plane. The plane suddenly ran out of fuel halfway through the flight. The captain announced that one person must jump off the plane to reduce the weight, so Then the Americans showed their personal heroism and walked to the hatch of the plane and shouted: Long live the United States and the nations! ! Then he jumped! The plane continued to fly... At this time, the captain announced again: The weight was still too heavy, so he had to jump off alone! So the Germans stood up, walked to the hatch of the plane, and shouted: Long live the German Empire! He also jumped down! The plane continued to fly... At this time, the captain announced: No, it's still too heavy, and one more person must jump out! The Chinese glanced at the Japanese, stood up and walked to the plane hatch. The Japanese quickly came over and held the Chinese's hand tightly: Good brother, I will never forget you! The Chinese people shouted: Long live the Republic of China! ! Then he kicked the Japanese down! ! ......

3. My wife played mahjong until early in the morning and came home. In order not to disturb her husband, she took off her clothes in the living room before entering the bedroom. When my husband woke up, he was so angry that he said, "This is too much!" You lost everything?

4. A gentleman went to take the driving license test. During the oral examination, the examiner asked: "When you saw a dog and a person in front of a car, did you run over the dog or the person?"

The gentleman replied without thinking: "Of course you run over the person?" It's a dog."

The examiner shook his head and said, "You can take the exam again next time."

The gentleman was very unconvinced: "If I don't kill a dog, how can I kill a person?" ?"

The examiner shouted: "You should brake.

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5. A very fat woman got on the bus and couldn’t find a seat, so she could only pull the pull ring on the bus. Unexpectedly, the driver braked suddenly and the fat woman broke the pull ring. She immediately rushed in front of the driver. The driver looked at her and the pull tab on her hand and said angrily: "If you collect three, I will give the driver a signed photo!" "

6. There was a beautiful lady who took out a tissue from her bag and wiped the seat vigorously after getting on the bus. When she was about to sit down, she farted. A gentleman next to her heard it. He said jokingly: Miss is really good at hygiene. She wiped it for so long and still had to blow it!