1. It is very important to let others remember who you are and what you talked about when you first met. If you get off to a bad start in conversation, it will take a lot of effort to save this disadvantage, and it is not necessarily useful. Therefore, when meeting with others, as a "self-introduction" at the beginning, you must never be careless. So how should we "introduce ourselves"? First of all, smile, a smile will make the other person feel warm. If you don't smile, you can't create a harmonious and harmonious atmosphere. When you meet, look at each other and smile at each other, then there is the self-introduction of "My name is XXX". The main point of this introduction is to make it clear. If the other party calls you by mistake because you don't understand your name, they will feel very embarrassed and easily lead to unpleasant scenes. Therefore, when introducing yourself, besides making it clear, it is best to add a sentence such as "The king is the king of the king." This will not only make the other party misunderstand, but also deepen the impression. Another point is very important. Self-introduction is of course to make the other person remember his name, but at the same time, you must also remember the other person's name. If you don't remember clearly, it will not only disappoint the other party, but also be impolite. Is there any effective way to remember each other's names? The best way is to find an opportunity to say each other's names, which will help you remember. Furthermore, if you often mention the other person's name in your speech, the other person will feel that you attach great importance to him and feel happy, so it can promote the exchange of feelings. This is a common method in social communication in Britain and the United States and is worth learning.

2. The best way to promote yourself is to let others accept it easily and unconsciously: praise each other and praise themselves secretly. When it comes to selling yourself, if it is too explicit, it will not be liked; Besides, it's very hard to boast! Just like hearing about other people's affairs, there won't be much joy. However, as long as you are a person, you still have the problem of showing off. When talking about your own personal things, you still want to talk about boasting, so it is necessary to know the saying of boasting. So, what can I say? There are two best ways. One is, don't brag about yourself all the time, but rap while flattering each other. For example, when you want to brag about your fur coat, you say, "This is a fur coat. It's very warm! Do you like it? However, the buckskin-like fabric on your body is good for everyone! Especially the dark green, so beautiful! Whenever you wear it, I appreciate it. " That's enough to say. Another way, maybe to make someone's face shine! After all, some things can't be done by yourself, but only by relying on the strength of others. For example, if you want to boast a little about your qualifications as a dance teacher, don't forget to add another sentence: "Because my mother is also a teacher, I was forced to study at an early age ... It is also my mother's fault! Actually, if you think about it, you can't do much by yourself. And personal talent is limited, and there is always something powerful beyond it, isn't it? Therefore, if you want to boast to others, you must think thoroughly and have something to boast about yourself. In this way, you won't hate your boasting.

3. honorifics are a sign of a person's self-cultivation. If you use honorifics incorrectly in social situations, it will be very embarrassing. For example, when you ask someone to serve you, you should add the word "please" or "Mr. A". Especially in conversation, when addressing each other's parents, you should say "uncle, aunt", and directly say "your father, your mother" is certainly acceptable, but it lacks elegant temperament. A well-educated person should not ignore these things. The same sentence will give people a completely different feeling because of different ways of saying it. For example, someone in front of you is blocking your way. Of course, you don't have to ask him to get out of the way. At this time, if you say, "Get out of the way! Get out of the way I want to go over there! "Maybe for just dismissive supercilious look. If you can use honorific words, say politely, "Excuse me, sir, would you please make way? "The other party will immediately get out of the way and let you pass with a smile. Moreover, honorifics should also be used appropriately, otherwise, the opposite effect may be obtained. This habit should be well cultivated in ordinary times. For example, in a crowded bus, you accidentally stepped on someone else's foot. If you don't get into the habit, you will fly into a rage. If you apologize to the other person naturally and gracefully, say, "I'm sorry! "The other person just smiled and said," It doesn't matter! "In fact, as long as you get into the habit and always have the idea of respecting others, then respect will naturally come out and you don't need to use too many honorifics. For example, the boss of the company has something to call you. You don't need to use honorific words, just nod your head with a smile naturally and ask, "What can I do for you? "Then your respect will naturally come out.

4. don't treat people lightly when you meet them for the first time, exchange names after greeting, and then hand in business cards to each other. Such a small action as submitting a business card should also attract attention, and proper methods should be used. 1) Business cards should be placed in the business card folder, not in other ticket folders, and should not be randomly placed in small notebooks, which will be rummaged everywhere. 2) The business card holder should be put in the inner pocket of the suit, not taken out of the pants pocket. 3) Because each clip will be used for a long time, buy a good quality as much as possible. 4) If the other party holds out his left hand to submit a business card, he should hold out his right hand to pick it up, and the left hand should also submit a business card, so as to exchange it with each other. 5) When accepting a business card, the right hand picks up the other person's business card and the left hand holds its own business card holder. 6) If there are any illegible words in the names on each piece of the other party, please ask them politely. 7) If the other party has more than two people, arrange their business cards and talk to them respectively in the order of business cards. 8) If people sit in a chair, they should carefully put away their business cards, and then greet each other and say goodbye. For the method of submitting business cards, the following is also explained for reference. Requirements: take the lower end of the business card to make it easy for the other party to pick it up; Position to the other person's chest; Just when receiving the other party's business card unilaterally, you should extend your left hand and right hand at the same time.

5. Don't talk about nicknames in the first meeting and formal occasions. In some places, when some people introduce themselves, they often even say nicknames, for example, "My name is boss, which is what universities usually call me, so you can do it! "But in our country, the use of nicknames is limited to close friends. It is harmless for close friends to call each other nicknames. However, if there is a third party present, we should pay special attention. If you always call each other or other people who are not present by nicknames, it will make the third party confused and feel alienated. If your friend takes you home for the first time, then you suddenly say to him, "San Mao! I think what your family is, and I like it very much ... ",when you say this, it will definitely make your friend's family feel disgusted and think that you are not dignified and polite. Therefore, you'd better call him by his first name and don't use nicknames. Also, you should not use nicknames when giving a speech at the wedding ceremony. Because, on this occasion, there are many people, especially many relatives of both sides. When they hear nicknames, they must have a "don't have a taste!" "On the other hand, for your own sake, you shouldn't abuse nicknames on this occasion, because among the young people of the opposite sex present, some may become your first love, and when you hear your speech, you may be deterred. In short, nicknames are not unusable, but consider the place and environment. Otherwise, it is inconvenient to destroy the atmosphere of the environment and even lose your own temperament.

6. Open the gap with harsh words and let the silent person speak. It is better to say something that he has to refute. The interviewee is silent, so you might as well throw a few harsh words. As long as he opens his mouth to refute, he will easily fall into your trap and finally tell his true thoughts. For example, for employees who are inefficient in the company and don't obey the orders of their superiors, you can say something rude: "You must not get along well with your wife. "Hearing this kind of family evaluation that has nothing to do with work, even people who keep their mouths shut will feel hurt by their self-esteem and angrily deny it." There is no such thing. "At this time, we should pursue 56-point thrashing." How can you be so confident? "He may fall into the trap and tell the truth about his dissatisfaction. Make it impossible for him to refuse to turn the reason why the other party refused you into the reason why you sought him. The editor of a magazine is a master at inviting writers to write articles. He doesn't belong to the eloquent man. He only said to the writer "I'm too busy to write a manuscript …": "I know you are busy, and because you are busy, I invited you to write a manuscript. People who are too idle will not have good works. "His practice of inviting busy people to write articles has never failed. Generally speaking, it is quite difficult for a person who has strong reasons to refuse to accept. Because this kind of person is fully prepared psychologically, pleading words such as "Please help …" will make him feel bored. To deal with this kind of people, we should follow the precedent and praise the other party's reasons before making demands, which may be effective. The most handy person to apply this method is the cosmetics salesman. When they meet users for the first time, most housewives will not buy them. At this time, the salesman will say, "I know that you don't need cosmetics to see your thin and tender skin. "Few women are indifferent to this, and then the salesman adds," But the hot summer sun … ",so the housewife will happily pay for it.

8. Open the topic of silence. Take the subconscious actions of the other party as the topic of opening silence. When two people who don't like talking sit side by side, the scene will be quite embarrassing. Especially for people who meet for the first time, is there a magic formula to make the conversation go smoothly? Yes, this is to take the subconscious behavior of the other party as a topic. If the other person just smokes blindly, and you find that he has a certain habit when turning off the firewood, immediately ask him: "Your action of turning off the firewood is very interesting, and it will go out with a flick. "When you see two and a half spoonfuls of sugar in each other's coffee, you can also ask," I'm sorry, why do you have to put two and a half spoonfuls of sugar ... "Usually, in the face of such questions, the other party will have to speak, and maybe it will arouse the other party's endless memories.

9. Use "we" more than "I" when you speak. Everyone has the feeling that when riding a bicycle at a red light, if you run together, you will be less afraid. This shows a kind of public psychology, that is, if several people face danger together, the feeling of danger will be weaker and even a sense of security will be generated. For example, in Japan, there is a notorious "sex tour group" in Pupu. Male members of this tour group travel around Southeast Asia, mainly to visit brothels. Those gentlemen who seem honest and kind in Japan, once they join this group, suddenly become men who are hated by people. This is also the "collective consciousness" at work, that is, the burden of one thing is diluted to everyone, and the personal burden is much lighter, so there is no longer guilt. This method of diluting pressure or risk is suitable for any occasion. When the unit encounters difficulties or pressure, if we emphasize everyone's consciousness and use "we" more than "I", it will not only help convince the other party, but also enhance confidence.

1. Don't belittle your habitual modesty, but make people think that you are a "grouchy" and enterprising person. Some people like to belittle themselves, for example, "people like me are just poor wage earners!" "Or:" As you can see, I just don't have it! "Although your starting point is modesty, if you don't want others to think that you are a gloomy person, you'd better not talk about yourself in this unfavorable tone. Of course, it doesn't matter if you say it occasionally, but it will become a habitual saying over time. As long as you observe people who like to say this kind of words, you can find that they often use it. As for the other party's reaction? Maybe I didn't pay special attention to it at first, but if you listen to this tone every time you meet, you will gradually find it boring to meet such people. What's more, it will also give people an idea that this is not modesty, but that there is really no; This is what psychology calls "cumulative suggestive effect". If you often say "you are really not" or "you are so stupid" to your child, even if the child is perfectly normal, you will feel really useless over time. Just like this, what you often hear will be considered right, which is one of the characteristics of human nature. Therefore, belittling your own statement will not only be of no benefit to yourself, but will also be self-defeating and make others think that you are really as you say.

11. Find a high hat for someone to wear and secretly give them a casual high hat, even if they nag, they will listen. Once, a friend who was a section chief in the company told the author that no matter what questions one of his subordinates raised, he would start with the statement "Can I ask you two or three questions?". Although most of what this man said was against the opinions of the section chief, the section chief could not refuse to listen to his questions because of his wonderful way of asking questions. It is also a good practice to adopt this method when direct refutation is easy to cause friction. That is to say, asking questions to pose for advice from the other party can stimulate the other party's sense of superiority, thus reducing the other party's dislike of you and not leaving the other party with the impression that you are arrogant.

12. Eliminate the strangeness of first acquaintance as soon as possible. Meeting is predestined relationship, and try to avoid irrelevant boring words. When people meet for the first time, they always choose some irrelevant topics, such as the most typical conversation: "It's a nice day today! ""yes! It's sunny in the morning! "This kind of formulaic dialogue can't leave a deep impression on people at all, and the same people can't remember your impression. Such a conversation is a waste of time and energy. Some people may think that speaking at the first meeting is too presumptuous because they don't know social etiquette, so there is no need to think so much about it. For example, you can say, "My mother and I didn't get along very well recently, but yesterday we talked happily for an afternoon, and the misunderstanding was completely solved ..." Or say, "It's so hot these days that I just cut my hair short that my friends don't recognize it ...". It is a good opening remark to take your own recent situation as the theme. When choosing the content of your speech, you should consider the living conditions of the other party. Only when you speak according to the situation can you deepen your impression on each other. If you want to impress others when you meet for the first time, you must first eliminate the distance between them. A certain unit once invited a gentleman to give a speech on the stage, and his self-deprecating speech eliminated the distance from the audience at the beginning. He said, "I met you for the first time today, and it happened that I wore a pair of beautiful new leather shoes, but because of the crowded bus, the new leather became old and my feet were blistered ..." In short, only by eliminating the strange consciousness of meeting for the first time as soon as possible can the other party leave an indelible impression. Because we all live in a certain environment for a long time, sometimes speaking becomes a mere formality. How to attract the attention of the other party lies in how to choose the topic. Smart you, why don't you use creativity to create a miracle of conversation?

13. before you speak, you can give people a clear and orderly impression by talking about the main points and the important ones. Make others talk.