Careful selection
Kill the panda with 1, and I will be a national treasure!
Watching the excitement here is really not too big.
Congratulations, my friend! Ah, can I wear it? You see, it's just different Much poorer than before.
I miss you so much that I can't eat. It's disgusting!
I hate myself, this little tree can't stay, a bird like you.
If I win10 million, I will rent the house to others and collect the rent once a day. Wow Kaka-enrichment!
I'm sorry to make you laugh.
Zhuge Liang had never led a soldier before he came out of the mountain! Why do I need work experience?
Harmonious society emphasizes calmness.
10 Hold your hand and you will know that your son is ugly and his face is full of tears.
1 1 I'm not RMB. Why does everyone like me?
12 How to lose weight if you are not full?
13 If you see a shadow in front of you, don't be afraid, it's because there is sunshine behind you!
14 I like you so much that you will die if you like me?
15 The most touching sentence my father said: "Study hard, son. Dad used to play mahjong in blocks, but now he plays mahjong in blocks for you to learn. "
Selected specimen collection
1 My name is God, my name is Jesus, my English name is God, and my dharma name is Tathagata.
I just chopped thorns and dragons on the road, swam across the river, climbed to the top of the tower and kissed your princess.
Take off your clothes, I am an animal. Put on your clothes, I am the devil wears Prada!
The story of Meng Mu's three moves actually shows that she has a good son. If I were you, it would be useless to move it a hundred times!
The only difference between a marriage certificate and a production license is that it is not hung on the wall.
I don't know whose wife is in my bed, and neither does my wife!
The Internet is like a prison. You stole a wallet in, but you know everything when you go out.
My ID card is fake. Don't believe that I am a liar.
My buddy and his girlfriend are busy with production every day after they get the production license.
10 I thought about having a holiday every day when I was at school, but now I have a complete holiday and want to go to school again!
1 1 Status quo: I'm wasting time, I'm wasting time, I'm blurring the present, and I'm afraid of the future.
12 love is like a fart, with a high profile at the beginning and a low profile at the end.
13 Valentine's Day confession, people don't listen; April fool's day confession, people do not believe; Qingming confession, people should not. Alas.
14 in today's society, it is useless to cook raw rice into cooked rice. Even if it turns into popcorn, the runner will still run.
15 In every dormitory, there is one who grinds his teeth, one who talks in his sleep, one who snores and one who sleeps very late.
collected works
1 People never know who inadvertently said goodbye to you and then really disappeared.
In fact, I used to be quite tall, but later I often took a shower and shrunk.
You are wearing my collar shirt, and that's Yi Zhongtian standing there; Put on my Chinese tunic suit, and you will soon become Feng Xiao. Wearing my leather jacket, sprint champion Bolt; Wearing my black vest, US President Barack Obama! You wear my leather jacket, movie actor Ge You; You wear my t-shirt, CCTV host Lao Bi.
You underestimate me, Feng Gong. I am an artist in Feng Gong, and real art is priceless. You think about a pile of money, think about a pile of money. That depends on how much it costs, right?
I became a buttonwood tree, and even the phoenix came to me. I don't believe it. I can't let you come back, a bird!
Six people are not smart, and they are all bald like others.
Jiaozi needs this clove of garlic for such a big plate, so stay!
The physical education teacher in junior high school said: whoever dares to wear a skirt to my class again will be punished for handstand.
Speak louder. You don't need electricity!
10 Don't ask, the room is rented. If you call again, you should hit the child.
1 1 Count the stars with me. If your IQ is low, count the moon!
12 You won't be lonely if you want to make chopsticks!
13 I not only have a car, but also work by myself. ...
14 Even if it is a piece of shit, I will meet dung beetles one day. So you don't have to worry too much about yourself today.
15 I never hold grudges, but I usually report them on the spot.
16 has become a butterfly, and it is still flying in Doby.
17 is not sleeping in class, but getting drunk on the wine table.
18 If you don't have medical insurance and life insurance, don't try to be brave after dark.
19 No matter how much water you have, you can't drink enough loneliness.
Don't be as optimistic as a fart, thinking you can shake the world.
Brother 2 1, where to fall, where to lie down.
After watching all the porn in the world, I naturally feel * * *-
People say things and fart. Like farting, talking is just a breath.
You are such a big turtle, how can you compare with me?
I am in a bad mood today. I only have four sentences to say, including this one and the first two. I've had enough.
Love, say it out loud, because you never know which comes first, tomorrow or accident!
Why do I always feel unhappy? Is it because I wasn't at home when I was chasing Happyness?
Please don't speak English in front of me in the future, ok?
Why can't the men's soccer team even rush out of Asia? Because there are 1 1 women on the court.
Nowadays, many noble daughters with blond hair and blue eyes on the other side of the ocean are crying to get the China green card and throw themselves into the arms of unmarried men in CCTV Spring Festival Evening.
Classic humorous signature sentence