Requesting funny text messages, QQ signatures, or short stories

Funny text messages:

1. You are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am sad because you have lost weight, I have lost weight because you are sick, and I laughed. Because you are strong and I am rich because I sold you... pig!

2. If there is no wind, the clouds will not move; if there is no water, the fish cannot swim; if there is no sun, the moon will not have light; without you... Idiot will not exist.

3. When I was in poverty, you were by my side; when I was sick and injured, you were by my side; when I was frustrated in love, you were by my side. ...What a bad luck to be with you!

4. Please look... please look... keep looking... look down... keep looking... look carefully... idiot! Just watch it if I ask you to watch it? !

5. I want to wish you a happy Valentine's Day but no one is with you. I want to wish you a happy May Day but you are unable to work. Finally, you can feel proud on Women's Day, but you don't have the right!

6. I am very ugly, 1.49 meters tall, with primary school education, rural registered permanent residence, no house built, no savings, wandering around, working to make ends meet, nothing to do, just drink some wine and make a fortune. Text messages and tease the puppy.

7. I wish you: "Night Banquet" every day, make money by watching "The Promise", love like "The Great Sage", righteousness like "Fearless", strong body like "King Kong", everything goes well Super "Myth"!

8. What’s going on? ! I dialed your mobile phone just now. After the ringtone, the mobile phone prompted: You are looking for a pig from out of town. Please dial the pig pen area code before the number. I can't believe it! ! ! He dialed again and said: Sorry, the user you dialed is being slaughtered! ! !

9. If you receive this message, you will like me. If you delete it, you will have a crush on me. If you reply to this message, you will marry me. If you don’t reply, you will marry me. If you modify it, you will be mine. Save Then the next life will belong to me. You just have to figure it out!

QQ signature:

1. Please don’t call me a otaku, please tell me to stay at home; please don’t call me a otaku, please call me Madame Curie.

2. Make your debut at the age of 0, make progress every day at the age of 10, have lofty ideals at the age of 20, work hard at the age of 30, basic orientation at the age of 40, be popular at the age of 50, play mahjong at the age of 60, and hang out at the age of 70 , 80-year-old Lala doing her homework, 90-year-old hanging on the wall.

3. When I woke up, it was dark.

4. I don’t tidy my room, I am the beauty in a messy room!

5. I smoke because it hurts my lungs, not my heart.

7. I am nostalgic because I cannot see the future.

Small story:

1. Zhang Jie and Xie Na were swimming in Zhouxing Pool. Suddenly a strong wind blew and a heavy rain began. Wu Qilong jumped out of the water. Wu Qilong was holding Zheng Yijian. , riding Huang Jiaju, snatched Xie Na, Zhang Jie held Zhou Hua Sword, rode Zhou Jielun, passed Zhao Benshan, passed Jolin Tsai, jumped over Pan Changjiang, snatched Xie Na back, returned to Aaron Kwok, and hung up a side in the city Ren Xianqi!

2. There are three little pigs. Pig A’s name is “Who”, Pig B’s name is “Where”, and Pig C’s name is “What”. One day, Pig A and Pig B were standing at the door, and Pig C was on the roof. A wolf discovered them and wanted to eat them, so he rushed to Pig A...

Wolf: Who are you?

Pig A: Yes!

Wolf: What?

Pig A: What’s on the roof.

Wolf: I asked you what your name is?

Pig A: Who am I calling, what is on the roof.

The wolf asked Pig B again.

Wolf: Who are you?

Pig B: Who am I not, who is it (pointing to Pig A)

Wolf: Do you know it?

Pig B: Yes.

Wolf: Who is it?