A: Make a small request to the other party first, and then make a big request.
B: Make a huge request to the other party first, and then compromise into a big request.
Both methods have successful cases.
The former can be mentioned, let people living on the side of the highway sign the "fasten your seat belt" leaflet, and then ask for a giant ugly warning sign on his roof, so that more people will agree to set up a giant ugly warning sign. This is called the foot-in-the-door effect in psychology.
The most famous example of the latter is that Mr. Lu Xun mentioned that to open the window, the house should be demolished first. Professor Robert Siodini called it the refusal-concession strategy in his book Influence. This strategy has been used incisively and vividly by China people in bargaining.
To find out which of these two methods is better, perhaps we must first find out why these two methods are effective.
The former is to let the other party inadvertently change their cognition of themselves, and they are also embarrassed to refuse the second related request. In the example, "I" signs the seat belt leaflet, so "I" is a person with public morality and dedication, so "I" should promise to establish a brand.
The latter is a common skill in bargaining, and everyone can meet each other halfway, which is conducive to making a satisfactory result. This is usually done when there is a conflict of interest between the two parties.
If the former is not used well, it is called "pushing your luck".
If the latter is not used well, the first step will be called "wishful thinking" and then be driven away.
Therefore, only when the "request" can change the other party's perception of themselves can the A mode be used.
When there is a conflict of interest, it is best to choose mode B.
In addition, when the goal is difficult to achieve, it is best to choose mode A and implement it in multiple steps.
Example of Mode B: We ask our parents for money to go out to play, and we intend to ask for 100 yuan. What should we say? Say 50 first, then 50? This will obviously be rejected, and then ask for 200, and then my parents say no, just 50, and then they say no, at least 150, and my parents say 100, no more.
Example of Pattern A: Suppose I am a poor painter, and I have a crush on the princess of a neighboring country and want to marry her. If I go to the palace of a neighboring country to meet the king and queen, I certainly can't marry the princess. Not to mention that I will kill the princess and compromise and marry her. I had to tell the king first that I would give my painting to the queen, then send one to the princess for the second time, then ask to draw one for the princess, then ask to teach the princess to paint, then ask to take the princess out to teach painting, and finally ask to marry the princess. At this time, I am no longer a poor painter, but an artist who often goes in and out of the royal court, and also a teacher of the princess and a royal painter. It's easy to have a princess now.