1
One Saturday, my son invited his classmate Shirley to the Science and Technology Museum. As soon as they entered the exhibition hall, two little boys who love to explore were immediately attracted by all kinds of new technologies, and almost every project was so excited that they couldn't leave.
Shirley's mother and I followed, chatting one build and one build. We talked about our children's learning, the ups and downs in the process of raising children, and then somehow we talked about ourselves.
It's the end of the year again. It turns out that we are all daughters who are far away from home-her home is in Sichuan and my home is in Shandong. Because we are far away from home, we seldom go back to our parents' home once a year. She hasn't come back for two years because of the epidemic. This feeling of mutual appreciation suddenly brought us closer.
Shirley's mother gave me an excited hug and suddenly said, "Oh, by the way, my name is Ethan. You can call my name later. "
I also signed up and couldn't help laughing. I said to her, "Well, we have known each other for a year or two. Almost every weekend, we have an appointment to bring our children to play together, and we don't even know each other's names. "
Shirley's mother also smiled and said, "Yes, I've been a nobody since I had a child. She has been called Shirley's mother since she came out. Ma Bao, who often stays with us, seems to be like this. They are all' so-and-so mothers' and never know their last names. They became a group of unnamed women ... "
That's true. Since I had children, most of my circles have been Bao Ma, and their names have naturally become "children's names+mothers". Few people asked his real name, and he forgot to tell him.
Even if the children grow up together, we don't know each other's real names. As soon as we met, we shouted "Hey, whose mother-". Everyone seems to be used to this appellation from children and completely forget that they are also people with names.
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After that Saturday, Shirley's mother agreed with me, and we will all be called by our real names in the future. When you contact on WeChat, you also call the other person's name instead of "child's name+mother". We must remember that we are a person with a name, not just someone's mother.
I can't help thinking of my mother. As long as I can remember, my mother's name only exists on her ID card, and I seldom hear being called up in my life.
For decades, "Little Red Mother" was my mother's name and was named after my nickname. I am the eldest in my family, so even if I have a younger brother and sister later, the villagers are used to calling me mom like this. I used my nickname as my mother and accompanied my mother for most of my life.
Most of the mothers in the village are like this, such as "stone mother", "osmanthus mother" and "Mel mother" ... As for the real name, no one knows it except myself and my family.
My mother just learned to write her name a few years ago, because she set up a card in the town bank, and I need to sign the deposit and withdrawal. At that time, my mother, who was nearly sixty years old, finally learned to write her own name.
She writes slowly, but she is extremely dedicated. Make sure she writes it correctly. She smiled and showed it to me. In that excited smile, there is a little shyness and a little pride.
I praised my mother for her good writing, and she smiled more brightly. The mother who lost her name because of her child finally found her real name with a pen and wrote it down.
Although few people know my mother's name now and still call her "Little Red Mother", her name has been deeply engraved in my heart.
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In this world, how many mothers have become "nameless" women? They changed their names to children and became "so-and-so mothers", in the name of maternal love.
Even many mothers not only "lost" their names, but also "lost" themselves. There are countless dreams, but there is only one left: "be a good mother."
There is a saying in The Art of Love: "If a person can love others productively, he will love himself;" If a person only loves others, he has no ability to love at all. "
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As a woman, especially a mother, it is instinctive to love children, but we should also remember to love ourselves when we love children. After all, we should love ourselves before we can love the people around us.
For example, if you take good care of your body, you will have more energy to take care of the person you want to love; Only by taking care of your emotions can you take care of the people you care about with a gentler mood.
Therefore, women who are "ruined" because of their children should remember that they are also worthy of being loved; Remember your name-poetic or slightly tacky, but all of them have been loved and given good wishes by our relatives.
Remember, when we are so-and-so mothers, we are still ourselves.
Source/Semimonthly Talk (ID: banyuetan-weixin), read; Text: Reiko Kobayakawa
Picture/photo network