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2. The wolf said, "I will eat you! ! ! "Guess what?
As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.
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3. The stone fights with the rice cake, and the stone flies and kicks the rice cake into the sea. ..........
Once upon a time, there was a pair of lovers who secretly decided to live for life, but the boy needed military service, so he made an oath with the girl and gave her a diamond ring, promising to meet the girl three years later today. At that time, the ring will be used as a wedding ring.
Three years have passed, but the girl has been waiting for the boy, but she can't. She was heartbroken and desperate. She threw the diamond ring into the sea and left home. However, the boy has been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood the date place, which became an eternal regret. The boy was heartbroken ... A few years later, the boy went fishing. Guess what he caught?
Rice cake! ! !
Later, he finally caught a fish and bit something hard while eating. What do you think it is?
It's fish bones.
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Once upon a time, there was a pair of lovers who secretly decided to live for life, but the boy needed military service, so he made an oath with the girl and gave her a diamond ring, promising to meet the girl three years later today. At that time, the ring will be used as a wedding ring.
Three years later, the boy heard the news of a woman's marriage on the boat home. He was so sad that he threw the diamond ring into the sea in despair. Three days later, the ship landed. The boy went to a small restaurant in the street for dinner. A fish was brought. He picked up the fish and took a bite. He took a bite of something hard and spit it out. Guess what he saw.
Fish bones! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
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4. Is jiaozi a boy or a girl?
Answer the boy because jiaozi has a foreskin.
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5. There is a duck named Xiao Huang. One day, he was hit by a car. He shouted, "Gung!" From then on, he became a cucumber! !
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6. The matchstick suddenly felt itchy, so I reached out to scratch it and burned myself to death …
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7. Once upon a time, there was a bird.
He passes through a cornfield every day.
But unfortunately,
One day, a fire broke out in the cornfield.
All the corn has turned into popcorn.
After the bird flew over, ...
I think it will be very cold if it snows. ...
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8. When will Taiwan Province Province be reunified?
When buying instant noodles
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9. Asun and appa have nothing to talk about, telling each other that time waits for no man.
A song: "Recalling childhood, the happiest thing is Children's Day."
Apa: "Youth Day is in ten years."
A song: "Father's Day is in ten years."
Apa: "It will be the days of the elderly in a few decades."
A song: "In a few decades."
Appa: Tomb-Sweeping Day.
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10. Soldier: "Thirst … Thirst …"
Cao Cao: "Hold on a little longer! I have been to this place before, and I remember there is a merlin nearby, which may arrive in a moment. "
Soldier: "Oh! There are plums to eat! Oh! "
Half an hour later-Coss: "Master! The expedition found a lot of water! "
Cao Cao: "Ha ha ha ha, did you hear that? Finally, there is water to drink. "
Soldier: "If you don't go ... you must find Plum ..."
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1 1. A girl is lovelorn. I advised her: "Toads with two legs are hard to find, and men with three legs are plentiful!" "
12. One day, Xiao Qiang asked his father, "Dad, am I a stupid child?" Dad said, "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy?"
13. A medium-rare steak and a medium-rare steak meet in the street. Why don't they say hello? (assuming they can talk)
because ............
because ................
Because they are all strangers ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
14. Question: How to make sparrows quiet?
Answer: Click.
Reason: Silence (silence).
15. A college student was unfortunately caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, "Say, where are you from?" I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! ! ! "The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted ... He said," I am from RTVU! " "
1, it's dark and windy in the month. Daming is working the night shift at the expressway toll station alone, and suddenly the evil wind blows!
With the low engine roar, I saw a black car slowly stop at the toll gate. Daming looked up and looked intently! There is no one in the driver's seat! !
Panicked Daming quickly lifted the railing and let go! The black car passed slowly. ...
What happened afterwards? Later ... the car slowly drove into Kaifeng House.
2. On the bus, a man holds it in one hand and his fingers are separated, as if holding a bowl. When he got tired of holding it, he changed hands carefully, as if holding an invisible ball.
Everyone was curious about what he had in his hand, and finally someone couldn't help asking, "Dude, what are you practicing?"
The buddy replied, "My wife asked me to buy her a bra for fear of forgetting the size ..."
3. Cao Cao has a headache. Hua tuo thought that the root of Cao Cao's headache was the skull, so he told Cao Cao: cut his brain.
Cao Cao was furious after hearing this: I have a terrible headache. How dare you sing? Somebody, drag it out and behead it.
Hua tuo, a chess piece
4. "Doctor, I feel a lot of pressure sometimes."
"When is it usually?"
"When cooking."
"Oh, what's your name?"
"Pressure cooker."
5, customer service is actually the main cause of constipation, because they often say to users: I am sorry for the inconvenience ~
6. I took the bus yesterday, and an uncle next to me was holding a mobile phone. Suddenly the phone rang, and the uncle immediately picked it up: "Hello? Hello? "
The sound is getting louder and louder. Just when everyone was inquiring about it, he put down the phone and said to himself, "Oh, it's a text message!" "
7. The unit will hold a sports meeting, and the 400-meter race will begin soon. On the court, colleagues are optimistic about Xiao Zhang.
To everyone's surprise, Xiao Wang, who is thin, actually won the championship.
Colleagues surrounded him and asked, "What makes you play so magic?"
He said shyly, "I'm in a hurry to go to the toilet."
8. I bought fruit when I was talking to my grandmother today. Grandma asked, "Why?"
"Buy fruit"
"oh! Remember to wash before eating! "
"Nothing, I bought bananas."
"oh! Then remember to peel it before eating! "
"……"
9. I bought a car a few days ago and wrote on my QQ signature when I drove back today: I have got the car ~ ~ hahaha. . .
I don't want to have comments from netizens: it's a bit like a thief reporting to the boss.
10, I saw on TV that nutritionists said to eat fruits and vegetables first, then staple food, and finally meat, because fruits and vegetables digest fastest, followed by starch, and protein is the slowest.
I think it makes sense. After I ate a melon and a bowl of noodles, I found that my beloved roast duck could not eat any more. . .
What nutritionist? You are a liar! ! ! !